In this episode of BJJ Mental Models, Steve Kwan welcomes back Sonia Sillan from Combat Arts Academy to explore the concept of the “awkward turtles:” the introverted, unsure, or atypical students who often feel like outsiders in Jiu-Jitsu. Sonya unpacks how gym culture, coaching priorities, and interpersonal communication affect whether these students feel welcome or alienated. Together, they discuss how creating an inclusive, empathetic training environment isn’t just good for business; it’s essential for building resilient practitioners and a healthy mat culture. This conversation offers a roadmap for coaches and students alike to rethink how they engage with the most vulnerable members of their gym.

Follow Sonia on Instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/soniasillan

Train with Sonia at Combat Arts Academy in Seattle:
https://caaseattle.com/


Mental models discussed in this episode:

• Jita Kyoei
  https://bjjmentalmodels.com/jita-kyoei/
  
  
• Compatible Intent
  https://bjjmentalmodels.com/compatible-intent/
  
  
• Controlled Breathing
  https://bjjmentalmodels.com/controlled-breathing/
  
  
• Staying Loose
  https://bjjmentalmodels.com/staying-loose/
  
  
• Escalation of Commitment
  https://bjjmentalmodels.com/escalation-of-commitment/
  
  
• The Golden Rule
  https://bjjmentalmodels.com/golden-rule/
  
  
  

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