August 22, 2017

Eps 106: Becoming Calm Responders with Alexandra Hughes

1 hour 6 minutes

World traveler, calm seeker, mom coach, multi-lingual speaker, Alexander Hughes, brings us her methods for supporting mamas in the chaos that is parenthood. The trials and tribulations of her own experience in motherhood would eventually fuel the passion of support she gives to other moms navigating the same road. Alex has created a soft space for mamas feeling out of control to find their rhythm and calm. At her website inneressencecoaching.com one has access to her workshops, authentic words of wisdom and that much needed place to connect with someone who gets it. With three kids and a handful of international moves Alex knows what it means to feel out of control in the mama chaos – which is why she has turned over every rock to find that much needed calm. We really should just make her wear a cape.

What you will hear in this episode:

Alex’s journey into and out of chaos

An experience of transitions from a working professional to working mom to stay at home mom and back to working mom

Our vision vs. our reality

Why finding calm is so important as a mother

The importance of mother’s nurturing a relationship with self

Identifying patterns and models in current parenting

Understanding where patterns and models come from

Understanding the internal work necessary to tackle patterns & models

How we set ourselves up and why this can ultimately lead to chaos

Changing how we see the road – going from linear to cyclical

Understanding the cycles through life

Awareness of what we model for our kids

Access to tools 1) manage stress 2) manage anger 3) creating a life for yourself that are aligned with values and self loving

How our words create expectations for the inner child

Where courage lies

Summary of how Alex helps mamas on the road to calm - #1 Internal Work #2 External Work

Self Care – is about “doing stuff that lights you up”

Calm responding wisdom & tools

Quotes:

“When you have kids and you're a stay-at-home mom and you have stay-at-home parents, checking those boxes and feeling that sense of achievement doesn’t always happen”. 6:34

“Models and patterns live deep inside of me based on my own childhood and my own experiences”. 11:16

“Create a new best friend voice that is going to support us in the choices we are going to make”. 12:06

“If we can switch from that and seeing these mistakes, those blowups as opportunities to reconnect with your kid, teach your kid, learn yourself”. 20:28

“It’s your job to love yourself and to practice self care and self love because your children are watching you. AND you are a better everything when you do”. 43:04

What does Joyful Courage mean to you:

“I think that you need to be courageous to be a conscious mom, to practice positive parenting, or to take that journey toward calm responding. It’s about opening yourself up to feelings. It’s about treating those moments as learning opportunities when you do ‘make those mistakes’. When you open yourself up, you need to be courageous to be vulnerable. Once you do that it opens up this space for connection, which without there would be no joy”.

Where to find Alex:

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By Casey O'Roarty

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