everyday compassion with Henny Flynn

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This episode is a bit of a love letter to mornings. Not the jump-out-of-bed, high-energy kind where we hand ourselves straight over to others and give them our day. 

No. 

This is a paean to that liminal space between sleep and wakefulness. To gifting ourselves slow moments to enjoy the dawning day.

I’m talking about real mornings and the metaphorical ones. The ones that come after a 'dark night' or period of wintering - when the world starts to feel a little more possible again.

I share some reflections on how I learned to reclaim my mornings, during my long healing process a few years ago, and how small shifts helped me effectively rewire how I moved through the day.

There’s also a practice I used to do (and forgot about until recently) that involved silently saying “you are beautiful” to strangers on my commute. Sounds a bit odd, I know, but it was surprisingly moving. I share how this morning practice helped me meet the world with more openness... and showed me some of my own unconscious bias along the way.

As often happens with these solo episodes, this meanders a little - from dark nights of the soul to metaphorical sunrises, via gargoyles in London. 

It finishes with a poem from My Darling Girl that somehow landed in my hand just as I finished recording. It begins 'Settle to the morning', which felt pretty perfect.

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RESOURCES

My darling girl vol. 1 by Henny Flynn https://www.hennyflynn.co.uk/my-darling-girl-vol-2

Wintering by Katherine May https://uk.bookshop.org/p/books/wintering-the-power-of-rest-and-retreat-in-difficult-times-katherine-may/3408348?ean=9781846045998

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In this episode, I speak with Moe Carrick – workplace culture expert, TEDx speaker, and mother of four – about the deep, often unspoken pressures that shape our identities at work and at home.

We talk about the myth of the perfect mother, the legacy of the provider-father, and the quiet courage it takes to say, “What I’m doing is enough.” Moe shares a beautifully layered story about a gingerbread house (yes, really!) and how that moment became a metaphor for the deeper journey of letting go of perfection.

We explore the ripple effects of shame, identity, ambition and care – and how the stories we’ve inherited can limit us unless we consciously choose another way. This conversation is full of warmth, honesty and insight, and left me reflecting deeply on how we show up for ourselves, and for one another, in work and in life.

PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY WISH TO LISTEN TO NEXT:

• Empathy and Transformation: Navigating Menopause in the Workplace with Pamela Windle (S14E6)
• Burnout and Self-Compassion, with Dr. Danielle de la Mare (S14E3)
• Debunking myths: returning to work & the gender pay gap, with Amelia Miller, Ivee (S13E9)

CONNECT WITH MOE

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/moecarrick/ 

Website: https://moementum.com/ 

Moe’s latest book: https://moementum.com/when-work-is-good/ 

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Depending on the stories we each carry, Mother’s Day can stir deep and complicated emotions. 

In this tender episode, I share that I was recently invited to write an article for The Gloss on the aspects of Mother's Day, that don't always get acknowledged. 

It inspired this episode and I include an invitation to write an unsent letter as a way of exploring the truth of your relationship with your mother, whatever shape that truth takes.

This isn’t about sentimentality or simplifying what may be layered with loss, distance, confusion or grief. Instead, it’s an act of profound compassion - a way to gently honour what lives within you.

I share guidance from Letters of Love, reflections from my own experience of writing to my mother, and finish with a piece from My Darling Girl - a reminder that, no matter what our story has been, we can learn to be a loving presence for ourselves.

If this day feels tender for you -  or for someone you love - I hope this episode offers a soft place to land.

BOOKS

Letters of Love - a journaling practice for wisdom & connection, published by Inner Work Project, available everywhere

My darling girl, vol. 1, only available direct from Henny Flynn

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In this episode, I share a piece of writing I rediscovered – something I’d captured in the quiet of a long-haul flight, sitting beside Anton as he slept. I had no memory of writing it, but when I read it back, it spoke to something that still feels deeply true: the idea of rest as a form of compassion.

I explore how the energy we hold – especially in those liminal, half-asleep states – doesn’t just affect us, but also gently ripples out into the world around us. Whether we’re lying next to someone we love, resting with a pet at our feet, or sleeping alone, there’s something powerful in noticing the waves we send out... and there's power in being discerning about the energies we receive.

This is a soft, spacious reflection – a chance to consider what we’re allowing in as we prepare for rest, and what we’re offering out. A moment to remember that even in sleep, we’re connected.

To read the full piece I wrote, I've shared it on the blog: https://www.hennyflynn.co.uk/how-can-rest-be-a-form-of-compassion

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After several episodes filled with depth, wisdom and vulnerability, I felt called to share something special with you - a beautiful piece of writing from the second volume of My Darling Girl. A piece that appeared when I opened the book at random. The synchronicity feels perfect for this moment.

The passage speaks to that universal experience of returning to centre: 

"And then here we are, safe once more, the spiralling thoughts have spun out of existence, the bird in your ribs has fluttered to calm, the soft breath is now reaching your belly and peace lays on your lips like a balm." 

These words remind us of our innate capacity to find stillness amid chaos, to release resistance and discover that profound sense that "all is okay."

What makes this wisdom particularly powerful is how it honours the full spectrum of human experience. As I reflect in this episode, true self-work isn't about toxic positivity or pretending everything's fine when it isn't. Rather, it's developing the ability to acknowledge when things feel difficult while also recognising moments of light and joy. 

This balanced awareness - being able to notice and articulate both the challenges and the brightness in our lives - forms the foundation of genuine self-knowledge and inner peace. Wherever you are today, may this brief but heartfelt episode offer a moment of calm and a gentle reminder that you can always return to your centre. 

What parts of your experience might be waiting for your acknowledgment today?

With love

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This season of the podcast has been threading together a quiet but powerful theme - the many ways we navigate fear. 

This week’s episode takes that theme deeper, exploring how self-compassion gives us the courage to stand in our own space, to hold our own hand, and to live with authenticity.

A quote from Dr. Kristin Neff helped spark this reflection:
 "One of the most pervasive findings of the research literature is that self-compassion leads to authenticity, because when we aren't dependent on the approval of others for our self-worth, we are free to express our true selves."

What does it mean to express our true selves? And what happens when we begin to return to ourselves, rather than seeking safety, validation, or belonging outside of us?

In this episode, I share my own recent experience of moving through a deeply challenging time - one that called for profound self-compassion and the willingness to stay present with myself, rather than retreating into old patterns of avoidance. 

Through journal reflections, poetry, and the simple yet profound practices that support me (like the physicality of running, walking or taking baths plus the emotional connection of clear communication with others and sitting with what is), we explore how we can hold ourselves with care and step forward with quiet strength.

This is an episode for those who are navigating their own moments of returning - those who feel the pull to reclaim their own space, their own self-worth, and their own power.

Settle in, listen, and see where it takes you.

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A piece of quiet
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So, you might remember that I'd decided to publish the podcast every two weeks - but here we are, just a week after the last episode. Because sometimes, there are no rules. Sometimes, something asks to be shared.

This is one of those episodes.

We're talking about power and fear - two forces that shape so much of how we move through the world. What happens when we hand over our power? And are we, in fact, handing it to fear itself?

These questions have been weaving through my own journaling and client conversations lately, and as I sat with them, I found myself reflecting on how easy it is to get swept up in the fears of others - fears that may never have been ours to carry. In this episode, I share my journal’s response to this question, a passage that speaks to the importance of recognising what is truly ours, reclaiming our choices, and stepping out of the currents of fear that do not belong to us.

And, as if by perfect synchronicity, I also came across a poem by Mary Oliver that captures this theme in the most resonant way. I read it towards the end of the episode (and share it below), and I suspect it may stay with you, just as it has stayed with me.

Settle in and listen. I'd love to know how this lands with you.

Henny x

I Worried
Mary Oliver

I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers
flow in the right direction, will the earth turn
as it was taught, and if not how shall
I correct it?
Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,
can I do better?
Will I ever be able to sing, even the sparrows
can do it and I am, well,
hopeless.
Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it,
am I going to get rheumatism,
lockjaw, dementia?
Finally, I saw that worrying had come to nothing.
And gave it up. And took my old body
and went out into the morning,
and sang.

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In this deeply heartfelt conversation, I’m joined by the wonderful Aisling Mustan (founder of the festivals: 'Exhale' and 'Good Grief') to explore the raw, tender terrain of what many call a 'dark night of the soul'. 

Aisling shares vulnerably and powerfully about her own recent experience - how it unfolded, what it revealed and the practices that supported her through it.

We talk about the discomfort most of us try to avoid, and how, paradoxically, it’s often where our deepest wisdom resides. We explore:

• The difference between true comfort and distraction
• The courage it takes to sit with what feels unbearable
• The role of grief, burnout, and unmet desires in shaping our inner landscape
• How practices like journaling, walking, and simply being can anchor us through the darkest moments

This isn’t a conversation about fixing or solving. 

As Aisling says, it’s about witnessing, honouring, and 'trusting the darkness' as part of 'life’s alchemical process'. 

Whether you’re in your own 'dark night' or simply curious about how to meet life’s inevitable lows with more compassion, I hope this episode brings you comfort - and the reminder that you’re not alone.

If this resonates, I’d love to hear from you. And if you feel called, please share the episode with someone who might need it today. You can also connect here with Aisling: @exhalehub OR www.exhalehub.com/school

With love, always,
Henny

A final thought: If you're feeling challenged by your own Samhain - please do reach out and seek the support you need. We ALL need different help at different times in our lives and that may be from your GP, a therapist, a trusted friend or a supportive family member. Always listen deeply to your needs and care deeply for your Self by taking the action that will most support you.

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***

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Sometimes, fear rushes in like an unexpected tide - one moment we're steady, the next we're caught in the swell. In this episode, I share a raw and honest entry from my journal, written during a winter break in Vietnam, where doubt and uncertainty flooded in. Through the simple yet profound act of listening - really listening - I found my way back to myself.

In this moment of listening, I wrote one of my My Darling Girl letters, those love notes from my wisest, kindest self. I share it here, followed by the words that poured out in my journal in response. It's an open-hearted exploration of what happens when we sit with our fears, rather than resisting them - when we meet them with curiosity, rather than judgment.

This is also a moment to reflect on the power of journaling, of writing letters of love, and of giving ourselves the space to hear our own wisdom. If you’ve ever felt the weight of self-doubt or the ache of uncertainty, I hope these words offer you something - a moment of recognition, of tenderness, of knowing you’re not alone.

Settle in, my darlings. This is a pretty vulnerable episode for me, so please hold it gently!

And if this practice of writing letters to your Self speaks to you, Letters of Love is now available - my newest book, born from the pages of my journal. You’ll find all the details, here in the show notes.

Sending love, always.

Letters of Love - a journaling practice of wisdom & connection

By Henny Flynn. Published by Inner Work Project. £12.99

From all good booksellers, or order direct from the publishers: https://innerworkproject.com/product/letters-of-love/

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A piece of quiet
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everyday ♡ compassion
Tiny reminders of self-love and presence, delivered three times a week.
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Explore the power of Flow Journaling, self-compassion and gentle change in a supportive space.
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Explore tools for inner connection and compassionate growth.
Visit the library

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Explore whether coaching could support what’s calling for change.
...

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In this episode, I dive into the tender and transformative topic of 'knowing what is enough.'

Inspired by personal experiences, reflections on love, and the wisdom of the body, I explore how we can hold space for both joy and pain, embrace the impressions left by connection, and recognise when to say, “Enough, enough now.”

This conversation touches on themes of vulnerability, gratitude, and self-compassion, offering insights into how we navigate the balance between striving and contentment. I hope it resonates with you as deeply as it does with me.

REFERENCES:
Letters of Love - a journaling practice for wisdom & connection
Henny Flynn, pub. 6 Feb 2025, Inner Work Project

Support the show

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A piece of quiet
Your weekly pause - a calming relaxation practice, every Wednesday. A few minutes to settle, a few minutes to write. First aid for the soul.
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Sign up to hear more - and only receive what speaks to you.
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everyday ♡ compassion
Tiny reminders of self-love and presence, delivered three times a week.
Subscribe here

Free Events & Small Group Courses
Explore the power of Flow Journaling, self-compassion and gentle change in a supportive space.
See what’s on

Solo Retreats at Bach Brook
Rest, reflect and reconnect – fully supported in a place of deep natural beauty.
Retreat with me

Books, Journaling Resources & Self-paced Courses
Explore tools for inner connection and compassionate growth.
Visit the library

Free 20-minute Call
Explore whether coaching could support what’s calling for change.
...