In this episode, my guest is Patti Durand - author, speaker, facilitator, and mediator ​​specializing in succession planning for family businesses. Patti has just released her first book, The Future Leader - which is effectively a workbook families can read together and use as an instruction guide to work through the tough stuff. We discuss how much of the strife families experience is simply because they do not yet have the language to communicate their needs in a clear and effective way.

Patti shares key information about how assumptions, accountability, and avoidance play a big role in the success of the successor and what you can do to assure it. Our conversation is geared towards folks in agriculture, but Patti has made it a priority to make sure anyone reading her book, no matter their background or gender, is able to benefit from the wisdom within.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Patti Durand

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube.

• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - become a Farm Family Harmony Member
• RESOURCES - download for FREE
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

Timestamps

0:00:30 Introduction to Patti Durand 

0:01:21 Why the title to Patti’s book changed

0:03:00 Patti’s path to Brightrack Consulting

0:05:52 Patti’s key messages

0:06:53 Why the book was written in 2nd person and without gender 

0:09:21 Giving farmers the language they need for hard conversations

0:10:30 The thing about assumptions

0:13:23 Awareness and better decision-making at an earlier age

0:16:14 What’s stopping people from breaking down assumptions

0:17:15 Transparency and personal wealth bubbles

0:20:23 Accountability when you don’t know the answer

0:21:58 Why founders find financial transparency so difficult

0:23:39 Communication habits that are not serving us

0:24:50 A peer network beyond your family

0:29:30 What drives Patti’s passion

In this solo episode of the Farm Family Harmony Podcast, we’ll bring in the New Year with the topic of living with intention. Throughout the episode, I’ll ask you to ponder many areas in your life, including all the different roles you play in your busy life as a farmer, friend, and family member.

I talk about the fact that we have many choices when it comes to living an intentional life. I challenge you to go deep and explore how you’re currently showing up on the farm and what things you might want to change to show up differently in 2025. We’ll go over tips and ideas on practical ways to make mindset shifts that will lead to a more meaningful, intentional life. 

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube.

SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event

COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach

MEMBERSHIP - become a Farm Family Harmony Member

RESOURCES - download for FREE  

CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 

BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

0:00:00 Introduction

0:00:30 Alison Weaver’s Rural Lifestyle Planner, “Navigate 2025”

0:01:36 Living an intentional life 

0:02:55 Speaking engagements in 2025

0:04:33 Shifting mindsets in agriculture

0:05:45 How are you living intentionally in your 6 Key Roles?

0:08:24 What is your Rallying Cry?

0:09:32 Community Support (beyond your family)

0:10:40 One of the roles I struggle with 

0:11:48 Your cherished belief

0:13:35 Financial Transparency 

0:15:19 Blocking priorities in Google Calendar

0:16:19 Planning your mini-transition

0:18:46 Cocooning

0:22:40 Having strong self-worth

0:23:17 What is your vision for 2025?

In this episode, my guest is Farm Family Coach Lyle Wiens - a professional Agrologist and Grain Marketing Advisor, with training in conflict management, mediation, and group facilitation.

We discuss Lyle’s knowledge on an approach to leadership called the “Art of Hosting”, including the four Principles of Dialogue in which the goal is a meaningful and impactful dialogue that is respectful, creative, generative, and allows for solutions. Listeners will gain insightful and practical wisdom on how to achieve a farm family transition that is oriented towards creating conditions for positive relationships and building healthy teams and organizational culture.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Lyle Wiens

Elaine Froese Resources:

• Watch this episode on YouTube.
• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - join the waitlist for the Farm Family Harmony Membership
• RESOURCES - download for FREE
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

Timestamps

0:00:30 Introduction to Lyle Wiens

0:03:34 Art of Hosting and the Principles of Dialogue

0:05:33 Key Principles of the Principles of Dialogue

0:08:42 What it means to “host yourself”

0:10:03 Listening vs Convincing

0:10:42 Barry Johnson and Polarity

0:13:51 Honoring the intensity of agriculture

0:18:00 Power dynamic in farm family transition

0:18:45 Navigating and hosting powerful people

0:20:00 Sitting with tension and being conflict-aware

0:22:23 The stories we tell ourselves

0:23:25 Power, Control, and Perfectionism

0:25:42 Nonviolent Communication

0:26:23 Life-alienating Communication

0:27:26 Moralistic Judgements

0:29:16 Limiting Beliefs 

0:31:35 There’s always a choice 

0:36:25 Crying and the culture of love 

0:35:42 A generational resistance to face-to-face conversation

In this episode, I sit down with multi-lingual (English/Spanish) coaching teammate and life-long learner Lydia Carpenter. Lydia is a first-generation farmer with a fascinating background in climate science and meteorology and a passion for people in agriculture. Together we explore the difference between "complicated" and "complex" systems, particularly as they apply to farm transition and family dynamics.

Through the lens of complexity theory, we discuss why cookie-cutter checklists often fall short and how embracing complexity can actually be empowering for farm families.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Lydia Carpenter

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube.

• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - become at Farm Family Harmony Member
• RESOURCES - download for FREE  
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

0:00:30 Introduction to Lydia Carpenter and complexity theory

0:03:55 Complicated is not the same as complex 

0:07:00 The three circles: family, management, and ownership

0:09:15 Why checklists aren't always the answer

0:10:38 Key characteristics of complex systems

0:13:02 The importance of internal and external stories

0:15:37 Creating space for meaningful dialogue

0:18:33 Self-awareness and situational awareness

0:21:41 Working with patterns and making changes

0:25:05 The power of diverse voices and perspectives

0:28:18 Moving forward despite uncertainty

0:30:34 Taking the next steps and creating healthy patterns

0:32:45 Embracing complexity in farm transition

0:34:50 The importance of ongoing dialogue and communication

In this episode, my guest is Glenn Dogterom, Farm Family Transition Coach, retired CPA, financial planner, and acting member of the Canadian Association of Farm Advisors. Over the years, Glenn has provided various services to his clients including tax planning and preparation, financial statements, cash flows, and transition planning. Glenn proposes there’s a better, more thoughtful approach to transition without all the pressure and potential for bad decision-making.

We discuss practical strategies for achieving realistic timelines and involving the younger generation from the get-go, as well as what to do and expect if you haven’t. At the end of this episode, you will gain a better understanding of how much time it truly takes to achieve a more meaningful transition, and why taking into consideration inevitables like illness and debt is so important.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Glenn Dogterom

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube.

• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - Join the waitlist for the Farm Family Harmony Membership
• RESOURCES - download for FREE
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

0:00:30 Introduction Glenn Dogterom

0:01:30 What to do when you’re stuck

0:03:55 Creating realistic timelines and involving your children in the process

0:07:00 Assessing your skills and creating a business plan as a younger farmer

0:08:21 Financial preparedness and passing on debt 

0:10:38 How to lean on your team of trusted advisors

0:13:02 Navigating transition in the midst of health issues

0:15:37 Finding harmony through understanding can take time

0:18:33 Glenn’s favorite “good transition” story

0:21:41 It’s a journey, not a sprint

In this episode, my guest is a teammate, conflict transformation facilitator, organization transition coach, and dairy farm partner from Chihuahua, Mexico, Crisol Gonzalez. Tune in to hear our discussion on how being aware of and taking personal responsibility for the role you play in conflict is crucial for success.

We explore what the Karpman Drama Triangle has to do with dysfunctional dynamics in an attempt to bring awareness to what roles you and your farm family members may be playing to contribute to conflict. Additionally, we discuss the work of Dr. Marshall Rosenberg and nonviolent communication, the difference between an emotion and a feeling, and a range of useful tools for conflict resolution.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Crisol Gonzalez

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube.

• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - become a Farm Family Harmony Member
• RESOURCES - download for FREE  
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

Timestamps

0:00:30 Introduction Crisol Gonzalez 

0:01:18 Karpman Drama Triangle 

0:04:23 Who in your farm family is playing the ‘victim’ role?

0:06:15 Why the ‘villain’ gets nothing accomplished in family meetings

0:07:37 How to get everyone to the table 

0:08:27 Women are tired of being the mediator in the middle

0:10:55 Getting triggered quickly

0:11:13 Dr. Marshall Rosenberg and nonviolent communication

0:11:47 Crisol’s work in the local school system 

0:12:36 The difference between an ‘emotion’ and ‘feeling’

0:15:45 The Conflict Dynamics Profile

0:17:50 Writing it out before talking is a powerful tool

0:21:59 Using voice notes if you don’t like to write

0:22:55 Asking permission before offering feedback

0:25:03 Conflict Basics 101 and dysfunctional dynamics

0:28:30 Having each other’s back

 0:29:36 Are farm women getting what they need?

0:30:34 The Farm Family Transition Membership and breakout rooms

In this episode, Elaine introduces good friend, spunky seniorpreneur, speaker, author of the award-winning book Return To Center, and clinical therapist Patricia Morgan. You’ll hear some awesome insights on how using ordinary language is one of the most powerful tools in her toolbox as a therapist, and yours as a farmer.

Elaine and her guest examine how Patricia’s discovery of Polyvagal Theory in 2020 led to a better understanding of what stress actually is, how it affects the nervous system, and how the simple use of intentional words can change everything. This episode provides listeners with some actionable tips and tools they can start using today, to stop catastrophizing and start returning to center.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Patricia Morgan.

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube.

• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - become at Farm Family Harmony Member
• RESOURCES - download for FREE  
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

0:00:00 Introduction to Patricia Morgan and her award-winning book

0:00:46 The motivation behind Patricia’s book “Return To Center”

0:01:43 Polyvagal theory - a new understanding of stress 

0:02:33 Using ordinary language vs complex medical terminology 

0:04:08 How Patricia helps people return to center  

0:08:38 Challenging triggering thoughts 

0:09:50 What is an “Emotional Bank Account” 

0:12:53 Catastrophizing and triggers  

0:14:40 Rocky Mountain Couples Retreat  

0:15:40 Jumping to conclusions and mind-reading 

0:16:36 How are you, really? 

0:17:28 Emotional reasoning

0:18:12 Expressing emotions is one the best positive conflict behaviors 

0:19:46 Judging, name calling, and labeling 

0:20:22 The danger of ‘You Are’ and ‘I Am’ statements

0:22:28 The power of the word “wow”

0:23:20 Hurt vs afraid 

0:24:35 How the need to be right is wronging your relationships

0:26:15 Self-compassion

0:27:48 The three emotional states and the one you wants to work towards 

0:30:00 Accessing mental health services

In this episode, Elaine welcomes friend, farm partner, and University of Nebraska agricultural economist, Jessica Groskopf. Elaine and her guest discuss one of the most challenging topics for many farm families - financial transparency in farm transition.

From addressing your biggest financial fears (whether you’re the owner or the heir) to the importance of having honest conversations around expectations, this episode offers practical insights for farm’s facing transition. Jessica highlights key strategies for ensuring financial transparency, the biggest generational differences when it comes to finances, why there IS such a thing as good debt, and some of the best questions every farmer needs to ask.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Jessica Groskopf

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube

• SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event
• COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach
• MEMBERSHIP - become at Farm Family Harmony Member
• RESOURCES - download for FREE  
• CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 
• BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

Timestamps

0:00:03 Hello and Personal Shout Outs

0:00:51 Introduction to Jessica Groskopf

0:02:05 Jessica’s Webinar

0:03:09 What are Your Biggest Financial Fears?

0:04:48 The Owner Generation and The Sunset Years

0:06:05 Having Honest Conversations

0:07:49 Your Parents Don’t Owe You Anything

0:09:46 Getting A Clear Picture of Your Compensation Package 

0:12:13 Good Debt vs Bad Debt, There is a Difference

0:15:33 The Generational Differences in Attitudes About Debt

0:17:39 Keeping The Books and Financial Transparency 

0:20:15 Living Expenses for the Average Farm Family Today

0:24:36 What’s Good Practice for Bank Accounts 

0:26:52 Where is it Written That Only Women Do Farm Books?

0:29:30 Strategies for Transitioning From The Older to Younger Generations

0:33:31 Jessic’s Stress Test

0:36:22 Some Great Questions for All Farmers

0:41:00 Jessica’s Top Three Takeaways For Financial Transparency

In this episode, Elaine connects with podcaster, agriculture entrepreneur, mom of two, and farm wife, Emily Reuschel. You’ll hear about Emily’s journey from fourth-grade teacher, to non-profit leader, and how she eventually ended up as a leader for rural women in the world of entrepreneurship, podcasting, and coaching.

Emily talks about her own personal development, the habits that have supported her success, both personally and professionally, and what it means to invest in yourself, transform your mindset, and start living life on purpose. You’ll discover that it IS possible to heal, grow, and experience joy in alignment with the things you truly want.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Emily Reuschel

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube

SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event

COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach

MEMBERSHIP - become at Farm Family Harmony Member

RESOURCES - download for FREE

CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 

BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

Timestamps

0:00:03 Introduction to Emily Reuschel

0:00:54 Emily’s backstory and current passion for women in agriculture

0:03:22 Emily’s many roles and her how her life on the farm has evolved over the years

0:05:38 Investing in personal growth and considering new possibilities

0:06:52 Counseling is about recovery and coaching is about discovery

0:07:33 Practices that have helped Emily and her husband stay emotionally strong

0:07:57 Chasing after the “arrival fallacy” and how it leads to burnout 

0:10:30 A powerful exercise to shift away from burnout 

0:13:27 Elaine’s battle with postpartum depression and the importance of mental wellness

0:14:13 The garden metaphor 

0:16:15 How Emily helps women find the time to discover what they truly want in life

0:17:13 Emily’s favourite question to remove expectations

0:18:30 Everything is figureoutable 

0:21:46 The importance of good friends, connection, and relationships

0:22:32 Healing yourself vs expecting someone to be your everything

0:23:52 Finding your people, despite age differences

0:25:02 Being the kind of friend you want to have and taking personal initiative

0:26:20 Elaine’s shout out to all the older women listening

0:27:37 Getting your partner on board with your growth trajectory 

0:31:20 Men in ag are showing up more in the personal development space 

0:32:52 Google Calendar is your best friend 

0:33:30 The best to learn more about Emily and final thoughts and encouragement

In this episode, Elaine connects with podcaster, agriculture entrepreneur, mom of two, and farm wife, Emily Reuschel. You’ll hear about Emily’s journey from fourth-grade teacher, to non-profit leader, and how she eventually ended up as a leader for rural women in the world of entrepreneurship, podcasting, and coaching.

Emily talks about her own personal development, the habits that have supported her success, both personally and professionally, and what it means to invest in yourself, transform your mindset, and start living life on purpose. You’ll discover that it IS possible to heal, grow, and experience joy in alignment with the things you truly want.

Access the full show notes for this episode at elainefroese.com.

Discover more about our guest: Emily Reuschel

Elaine Froese Resources:

Watch this episode on YouTube

SPEAKING - book Elaine for your next event

COACHING - find your Farm Transition Coach

MEMBERSHIP - become at Farm Family Harmony Member

RESOURCES - download for FREE

CONTACT - take the next steps in your transition 

BURNING QUESTION? Submit it here for Elaine or her coaches

Timestamps

0:00:03 Introduction to Emily Reuschel

0:00:54 Emily’s backstory and current passion for women in agriculture

0:03:22 Emily’s many roles and her how her life on the farm has evolved over the years

0:05:38 Investing in personal growth and considering new possibilities

0:06:52 Counseling is about recovery and coaching is about discovery

0:07:33 Practices that have helped Emily and her husband stay emotionally strong

0:07:57 Chasing after the “arrival fallacy” and how it leads to burnout 

0:10:30 A powerful exercise to shift away from burnout 

0:13:27 Elaine’s battle with postpartum depression and the importance of mental wellness

0:14:13 The garden metaphor 

0:16:15 How Emily helps women find the time to discover what they truly want in life

0:17:13 Emily’s favourite question to remove expectations

0:18:30 Everything is figureoutable 

0:21:46 The importance of good friends, connection, and relationships

0:22:32 Healing yourself vs expecting someone to be your everything

0:23:52 Finding your people, despite age differences

0:25:02 Being the kind of friend you want to have and taking personal initiative

0:26:20 Elaine’s shout out to all the older women listening

0:27:37 Getting your partner on board with your growth trajectory 

0:31:20 Men in ag are showing up more in the personal development space 

0:32:52 Google Calendar is your best friend 

0:33:30 The best to learn more about Emily and final thoughts and encouragement