Finding Fertility

By Monica CoxAlternative Health Health & Fitness Nutrition

Finding Fertility episodes

July 17Fertility Burnout: The Hidden Pattern Nobody Talks About During IVF & Infertility
You know what nobody tells you about the fertility journey? That the woman doing everything right, the one who's researched every protocol, optimised every habit, and shows up perfectly every single day, is often the most stuck.
This episode is different. No blackboard. No graphics. Just Monica, her eye patches, a pile of clean laundry on a semi-dirty floor, and one of the most honest conversations she's ever had on this podcast.
Because the laundry isn't about the laundry. And the fertility journey isn't about the protocols.
It's about the emotion underneath all of it that you've been avoiding, again and again, because feeling it is so much harder than just doing more.
In this episode Monica gets raw and vulnerable about her own buffering, her own patterns, and the four stages of awareness that actually move the needle when you've already done everything right and you're still stuck.
In this episode you'll discover:
The four stages of awareness that create real, lasting change in your fertility journey
Why awareness and understanding alone aren't enough — and what the missing action phase actually looks like
Why there is no quantum leap without first sitting in the uncomfortable emotions blocking you
What clean laundry on a dirty floor has to do with your fertility (seriously)
Why the Type A identity you've been glorifying is contributing to the chaos in your body
How changing the emotion connected to an event literally changes your cellular reality
Why most people stop just before the stage that actually shifts everything
Timestamps:
00:00 — Welcome to Finding Fertility
01:02 — Why Monica is folding laundry in her pyjamas and what inspired this episode
01:59 — Why she's been buffering and struggling to articulate this next phase of her work
03:28 — The knowledge is out there — why Monica's work has had to evolve beyond information
04:20 — When clients knew more than she did and what that revealed
05:18 — Observing yourself in real time — what true awareness actually looks like
06:17 — The four major stages of this work (awareness, understanding, emotion, action)
07:43 — Why most people stop before the action phase and what that costs them
08:39 — Stop adding knowledge — start calling yourself out with grace
09:34 — The clean laundry story and why the Type A identity was running the show
10:33 — How you get through what you want to change (it's not one session)
13:55 — There is no quantum leap without sitting in the fire first
14:51 — Why the people who make it look easy spent years sitting in the uncomfortable
15:22 — It's not the laundry. It's the emotion towards the laundry.
16:16 — What happens to your stories and emotions when you actually do the work
17:10 — When quantum leaps are real and when they're bypassing
18:08 — From AIP diet prison to eating lasagna again — what actually changed
19:12 — Where to start. Right now. Today.
19:36 — Closing reflection and leave a review
📖 Read the full blog post: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/fertility-burnout-the-hidden-pattern-nobody-talks-about-during-ivf-infertility
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
21 min
July 10Doing Everything Right But Still Not Getting Pregnant? Here's Why [Infertility & IVF]
Link to YouTube video & Blog post :: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/why-you-keep-repeating-the-same-fertility-struggles-even-after-doing-everything-right-infertility
You're doing the yoga, protocols, inner child work & meditations. You've read every book, listened to every podcast, tried every supplement. And you're still stuck. Still not pregnant. Still wondering what the hell you're missing.
This episode is for the woman who is doing everything right and still not getting the result she deserves.
Monica breaks down the framework she's been living and observing for years — why knowledge alone will never be enough to shift your fertility, and why the unconscious and subconscious patterns running through every cell of your body are the real reason you keep cycling through the same loops.
This isn't about adding another thing to your list. It's about finally understanding why the list isn't working.
In this episode you'll discover:
Why smart, high-achieving women are often the most stuck in their fertility journey
The difference between collecting knowledge and actually changing your patterns
Why your unconscious and subconscious beliefs live in your body, not just your mind
The role of radical honesty, radical awareness, and radical responsibility in shifting your fertility
Why cellular health and energetic work are not either/or — and why doing one without the other keeps you stuck
What it actually means to take contradictory action and why it's the scariest and most essential step
Timestamps:
00:00 — Welcome to Finding Fertility
01:02 — Why you feel stuck even when you're doing everything right
01:32 — Monica's personal story and how she started observing these patterns
04:45 — The type A burnout cycle and what finally woke Monica up
05:13 — The quick fix nobody can actually do (and why)
05:39 — Your unconscious beliefs don't live in your mind — they live in your body
07:29 — You don't need to be perfect — the real goal is enjoying your time here
07:58 — Your default frequency: where it comes from and why it was never yours
08:58 — The cycle most people stay stuck in and what keeps them looping
10:26 — Why we avoid going deeper and what that costs us
11:53 — Radical honesty, radical awareness, radical responsibility
12:53 — The danger of hyper-independence and rejecting support
13:51 — Neurons that fire together wire together — and you have decades of rewiring to do
14:48 — Your body is always fighting for you, even when it's fighting the wrong battle
15:15 — Why woo-woo work alone won't shift your human patterns
16:09 — The 3D game: why cellular health still matters alongside energetic work
17:35 — What happens when you actually sit with your subconscious instead of avoiding it
18:02 — Mind AND body — you can't energetically bypass a physical issue
18:32 — The first step: denouncing what was given to you that was never yours
19:31 — You are not on the timeline they sold you
21:56 — Closing reflection and leave a review
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
23 min
July 03Why You're Still Not Pregnant Despite Doing Everything Right | Infertility, Failed IVF & Egg Quality
Link to Youtube & Blog Post: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/why-you-re-still-not-pregnant-despite-doing-everything-right-infertility-failed-ivf-egg-quality
In This Episode
Why "doing everything right" can still keep you stuck
How cellular health affects fertility and long-term health
My personal IVF, miscarriage, and natural pregnancy journey
Why subconscious work isn't just affirmations
The hidden patterns that quietly keep you stuck
How awareness—not more information—is what changes your life
What if the reason you're still struggling isn't because you need more information?
In this episode, I share one of the biggest shifts that's happened in my own work over the last year. After spending more than a decade teaching fertility, I've realized that knowledge alone doesn't create transformation. Most women I work with already know what to eat, what supplements to take, and what lifestyle changes they "should" be making.
The real question is:
Why aren't those things changing your reality?
Using a simple timeline, I walk you through the way I now understand fertility, health, and life itself. We explore how your cellular health, inherited patterns, nervous system, subconscious beliefs, and identity all interact to shape the life you're living today—and why healing isn't about becoming perfect. It's about changing the direction you're moving.
I also share my own fertility story, from two failed IVF cycles and recurrent pregnancy loss to eventually becoming pregnant naturally after being told my egg quality couldn't improve. More importantly, I explain why that wasn't the end of the journey.
Because having the baby wasn't the biggest transformation.
Becoming aware of the patterns that had been running my entire life was.
00:00 – Welcome to Finding Fertility
01:00 – Why I'm moving away from teaching and toward awareness
03:55 – My fertility story begins: what eight years of infertility taught me
05:20 – The timeline that changed everything: cellular health vs. simply getting older
08:00 – My first failed IVF and refusing to believe there was "nothing I could do"
10:30 – The fertility line: why improvement happens long before success
11:50 – Discovering immune issues, inflammation, and the gut connection
13:15 – My first pregnancy after years of infertility
15:10 – IVF success, miscarriage, and the natural pregnancy I never thought was possible
17:30 – The biggest lesson wasn't fertility—it was my subconscious patterns
19:25 – Why high-achieving women plateau despite doing everything right
21:20 – "How do I actually change?"
21:45 – Why affirmations work for some people—but not everyone
25:55 – The emotional blocks and identity patterns keeping you stuck
27:10 – "But what about women who do nothing and still get pregnant?"
29:10 – Doing vs. Being: the trap so many women never see
30:35 – Consistency creates evidence: rewiring your nervous system and subconscious
31:25 – Final thoughts
Book a Fertility Breakthrough Session Today : https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation
If this episode resonated with you, I'd love if you left a review. Every review helps another woman discover this work and reminds the algorithms that awareness matters just as much as information.
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
33 min
June 05 Why She Gets Pregnant & You Can't: IVF, IUI Infertility & the Truth About Fertility Frequency Health
Every pregnancy announcement can feel like a quiet accusation.
Why can she get pregnant and I can’t.
This question is not about comparison. It is about cellular health and the basic fertility line most women have never been taught. Pregnancy is not proof of health. It is proof that the body had just enough energy to cross a line. When your mitochondrial function gut health and nervous system are depleted you might still conceive but the system is borrowing from reserves.
Fertility burnout IVF trauma subconscious blocks and emotional healing are rarely spoken about in the same breath as egg quality and hormone health. Yet your fertility does not live in isolation. It begins in the brain moves through the endocrine system and depends on the safety of your body.
The frequency behind your effort matters. “It’s not the doing. It’s the energy behind the doing.” If you feel like you are doing everything right and it still is not working this is not about more effort. It is about awareness. About the patterns running beneath your mindset.
About whether your body feels safe enough to create. Cellular health can be supported. Subconscious healing can shift your internal environment. And frequency is not something you fake. It is something you live. You are not broken. Your body is communicating. And sometimes the red zone is not punishment. It is an invitation.
Egg Quality:: The Fertility Cliff: Why “It’s Your Age” Is the Most Convenient Scapegoat in Modern Medicine:: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/fertility-cliff-why-it-s-your-age-is-the-most-convenient-scapegoat-in-modern-medicine
Full Transcription on the blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/why-she-gets-pregnant-you-can-t-ivf-infertility-the-hidden-reason-ivf-functional-medicine-are-not-enough-anymore
Fertile Energetics Journal: Six Core Steps to Emotional Alignment, Cellular Support & Conscious Conception on Amazon: https://amzn.to/4trMszr
Chapters:
02:26: Cellular health and the basic fertility line
04:21: Egg quality IVF and mitochondrial function
07:42: Pregnancy risks when reserves are low
11:27: Epigenetics stress and baby development
16:06: Partner energy resentment and subconscious blocks
23:54: Fertility burnout and pattern interruption
27:40: Frequency safety and emotional healing
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.

32 min
May 29 Hardest Truth I Faced During Infertility: Not Having Children How I Let Go to Get Pregnant Naturally
“My life would still be beautiful even if I never had children.”
Topics Discussed
• The emotional death grip many women hold during infertility
• Why fear of not having children creates nervous system tension
• My personal fertility journey including failed IVF and miscarriage
• The moment that shifted my relationship with motherhood
• Why letting go does not mean giving up on having a child
• The role of fear, identity, and control in the fertility journey
• How emotional attachment can impact the body and nervous system
• A powerful meditation to release fear around fertility outcomes
Hello Beautiful, Monica here supporting you to become the conscious mama you were born to be.
Today’s episode is a vulnerable one because we are talking about one of the hardest truths many women on the fertility journey cannot even say out loud. What if life could still be beautiful even if you never had children?
For many women struggling with infertility, the journey slowly becomes a death grip. Every decision feels like it determines your future, every month carries the weight of hope and disappointment, and life begins to revolve around one single outcome. I know this deeply because I lived it myself during my own years of infertility, failed IVF cycles, and miscarriage.
In this episode I share the quiet moment that shifted everything for me. A realization that my life would still have meaning even if motherhood never happened. Not because I stopped wanting a family, but because loosening that grip allowed my body and mind to finally breathe again. We also walk through a powerful meditation inspired by a Psych-K balance that explores both the best case and worst case life scenarios without children. Facing those fears can release the emotional tension that keeps so many women stuck in overdoing, overthinking, and constant urgency on their fertility journey.
“When your entire life revolves around fertility, you quietly enter what I call infertility hell.”
02:51 The death grip many women hold during infertility
04:17 How control patterns followed me into motherhood and business
05:13 The quiet moment that shifted my fertility journey
06:51 Why many women cannot say life would be okay without children
08:05 Releasing fear and loosening attachment to outcomes
10:02 The truth about physical healing and cellular health
11:30 Introducing the meditation inspired by birth and death balances
13:25 Preparing yourself emotionally before the meditation
17:04 Activating the thymus center
19:18 Activating the hara point
21:49 Connecting the thymus center and the hara point
24:39 Remembering when the desire for a child first began
27:54 Observing your fertility journey to the present moment
31:17 Imagining the best possible life without children
35:05 Facing the deepest fears about not having children
39:24 Returning to the present moment
43:49 Processing emotions after the meditation
45:45 Integration and emotional release after the exercise
Full Transcript on the Blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/hardest-truth-i-faced-during-infertility-not-having-children-how-i-let-go-to-get-pregnant-naturally
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.

48 min
May 22 What Happens After You Stop Trying So Hard to Conceive During IVF & Infertility
What This Episode Moves Through
• the moment when control starts to loosen its grip without force
• how overdoing slowly fades when you stop feeding it attention
• the difference between doing the work & becoming the work
• why nothing needing to be fixed can feel uncomfortable at first
• the quiet shift from urgency into steadiness
• what it feels like to live without bracing for what’s next
There was a point where pushing just… stopped working.
Not in a dramatic way. Not in a breakdown. Just a quiet realization that doing more wasn’t creating more. That the effort, the planning, the constant adjusting… wasn’t landing the way it used to.
And for a moment, that felt like something was wrong.
This episode sits inside that space.
Not the part where everything clicks into place, but the part where the noise settles & you’re left standing in something unfamiliar. Something quieter. Something that doesn’t need to prove itself.
It’s less about what to do next
& more about what happens when there is no next step waiting.
Timestamps
01:03 When there is no next step
02:03 Watching control soften over time
03:01 Creating from a different place
03:57 Expanding beyond just getting pregnant
04:24 Observing patterns without turning them into problems
05:23 The urge to rush & how it shows up
05:53 A different way of standing in your life
06:22 When pressure starts to dissolve
06:51 Letting uncertainty be enough
07:20 There is no finish line
Full Transcript Over on the Blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/what-happens-after-you-stop-trying-so-hard-to-conceive-during-ivf-infertility
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
9 min
May 15 Why Letting Go of Control Feels So Uncomfortable but Necessary During Infertility & IVF: Week 20
There was a point where doing more just stopped working.
Not in a dramatic way.
Not in a breakdown or a big realization.
Just a quiet noticing that all the effort, all the tracking, all the trying… wasn’t creating what it was supposed to.
And underneath that, something softer started to come through.
Not louder. Not clearer. Just… different.
This episode sits in that space.
Not where something new is introduced.
But where you start to see what has already shifted.
Where control doesn’t grip the same way.
Where urgency doesn’t run the show.
Where you don’t need to force yourself back into alignment… because you can feel when you’ve left it.
It’s not perfect.
But it’s enough to notice.
And that changes things.
This conversation moves through:
• The subtle shift from doing the work to living it
• How control softens without effort when awareness stabilizes
• The difference between discipline & embodiment
• What it actually feels like to trust yourself again
• Why there is no finish line, only a rhythm you return to
• Letting go of the idea that something external will fix this
There’s a different kind of honesty here.
The kind that doesn’t ask you to try harder.
The kind that doesn’t add more to your list.
Just a quiet return to what’s already there.
And maybe noticing…
how much less effort it takes now to stay with yourself.
Timestamps
00:57 Nothing new to add, only noticing what has changed
01:27 Control softening & awareness becoming steady
01:56 Coherence, surrender & embodied alignment
02:26 Moving differently without forcing it
02:54 There is no finish line, only a way of living
03:21 Consistency over the idea of a “magic fix”
03:51 Following intuition & releasing overdoing
04:21 Slipping back & finding your way again
04:49 Making this a daily way of being
05:18 Shifting from “have to” into “get to”
05:46 Supporting your body without pressure
06:13 Returning to who you are & trusting that
06:43 Closing reflection & integration
Full Transcript Over on the Blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/Why%20Letting%20Go%20of%20Control%20Feels%20So%20Uncomfortable%20but%20Necessary%20During%20Infertility%20&%20IVF
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
9 min
May 08 The Subtle Shift From Anxiety to Trust in IVF & Fertility: Week 19
There was a point where slowing down didn’t feel like trust.
It felt like I was falling behind.
Like I was missing something.
Like if I just paused for a second too long, everything would slip.
But nothing slipped.
What actually started happening was… space.
Not loud. Not obvious.
Just enough space to notice I wasn’t reacting the same way anymore.
This episode sits right inside that space.
Not the kind you force.
Not the kind you try to create because someone told you to surrender.
The kind that shows up when you stop pushing against yourself long enough to see what’s already there.
And what’s already there isn’t always big.
It doesn’t arrive with certainty or clarity or answers.
It shows up in the smallest moments.
Moments that are easy to miss if you’re still looking for something louder.
This conversation moves through that.
Not how to trust.
But how to recognize when it’s already happening.
What this episode moves through:
• The subtle ways trust shows up before you’re ready to call it that
• Waiting without anxiety & why that changes everything
• The shift from urgency into internal timing
• Choosing without fear even when nothing external has changed
• Letting experience build trust instead of trying to think your way there
There’s nothing to do with this one.
Just noticing.
Where you didn’t rush.
Where you didn’t override.
Where you stayed with yourself a little longer than you used to.
That’s where it starts growing.
Not through effort.
Through repetition of being inside your own timing.
And maybe the quiet part is the part that matters most.
Timestamps:
00:00 Welcome to Finding Fertility
00:37 Radical responsibility & creating space
01:07 What begins to shift after weeks of slowing down
01:36 How trust actually starts to show up
02:05 The subtle signs you’re no longer reacting the same way
02:35 Noticing one moment of staying instead of rushing
03:04 Trust grows through experience not effort
03:33 Moving toward integration in week 20
04:02 Closing thoughts & reflection
Full Transcript Over on the Blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/The%20Subtle%20Shift%20From%20Anxiety%20to%20Trust%20in%20IVF%20&%20Fertility
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
5 min
May 01 The Hidden Pattern Keeping You Stuck in IVF & Fertility Burnout: Week 18
What this episode moves through
• The subtle ways control still shows up even when you think you’ve “done the work”
• Why the mundane parts of your day hold more power than the big healing moments
• The nervous system patterns built in repetition, not intensity
• What it actually feels like to stop filling every quiet space
• The difference between thinking about change & living inside it
• How presence becomes something your body knows, not something you try to do
There was a point where I stopped looking for the big moment to change everything.
Not because I found it… but because I couldn’t keep chasing it.
I remember thinking something must be missing. Another protocol. Another shift. Another layer I hadn’t uncovered yet. And yet nothing was actually changing in the way I thought it would. Not in the timeline I had quietly decided it should.
And what I didn’t see at the time was how much of my life I was moving through without ever really being in it.
This conversation starts to land there. Not in the dramatic parts of the journey. Not in the big decisions or the big healing moments. But in the places that feel almost too ordinary to matter.
The parts of your day you usually rush through or fill up or try to get past.
And how those exact moments are where something deeper either stays the same… or finally begins to shift.
Timestamps
01:05 The reality of staying in the work over time
02:01 Bringing awareness into the mundane
03:17 Why big healing moments are not where change sticks
04:18 Presence inside ordinary life
05:17 Noticing the absence of urgency
06:12 How patterns are built in small moments
07:11 Parenting, awareness & self-compassion
07:40 Rewiring happens faster than you think
08:09 Returning to yourself in simple ways
08:35 What begins to shift without external change
Full Transcript Over on the Blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/The%20Hidden%20Pattern%20Keeping%20You%20Stuck%20in%20IVF%20&%20Fertility%20Burnout
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
10 min
April 24Fertility Burnout & the Trap of Self-Monitoring Your Healing During IVF & Infertility :: Week 17
“Awareness is not the same as self-monitoring.”
Topics Discussed
How awareness quietly turns into pressure and self-monitoring
The deeply ingrained pattern of being hypercritical with yourself
Why many emotional patterns are learned, not who you actually are
The difference between observing and trying to fix yourself
The concept of “the observer observing the observer”
How judgment, shame, and blame activate the nervous system
Why clean awareness creates regulation and softness in the body
Letting go of the need to improve every moment you notice
The internal stories that keep you stuck in “this is just who I am”
Moving into a more neutral, graceful relationship with yourself
Hello Beautiful, Monica here supporting you to become the conscious mama you were born to be…
And this week… we go a layer deeper.
Because a lot of you have done the work. You’ve slowed down. You’ve started noticing your patterns. You’re becoming aware. And instead of that bringing relief… it’s quietly turned into another thing you’re trying to get right.
Watching yourself. Correcting yourself. Wondering if you’re doing it “well enough.”
And I get it. I’ve lived that.
But this is where things can get a little sneaky. Because awareness can very quickly turn into self-monitoring. And self-monitoring almost always turns into judgment.
So instead of softening… your body tightens even more.
This episode is where we shift that.
Not by doing more. Not by fixing anything. But by learning how to observe yourself without adding another layer of pressure on top of everything you’re already carrying.
Because the truth is… you’re not stuck because you’re doing it wrong.
You’re stuck because you’re still judging yourself while you’re trying to change.
And once you see that… something opens.
“Judgment tightens the body. Awareness softens it.”
Timestamps
00:00
Welcome and grounding into your fertility journey
01:35
How awareness turns into self-monitoring and pressure
02:29
The root of self-judgment and learned patterns
03:18
The observer observing the observer explained
04:47
Why judgment tightens the body and awareness softens it
06:12
You are the only one judging yourself
Full Transcript Over on the Blog: https://www.findingfertility.co/blog/week-17%20Fertility%20Burnout%20&%20the%20Trap%20of%20Self-Monitoring%20Your%20Healing%20During%20IVF%20&%20Infertility
Let's Do This Together 💚
Monica
Instagram: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityIG
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@findingfertility
TikTok: https://bit.ly/FindingFertilityTikTok
🌺 Book Your Fertility Breakthrough Session Today here: https://calendly.com/findingfertility/discoveryconsultation?month=2022-10
🎙 Subscribe on your favourite podcast platform:⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Apple: http://bit.ly/FINDINGFERTILITYAPPLE⁣⁠⁣⁣⁣
Stitcher: http://bit.ly/FindingFertilitySTITCHER
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0BMtwCvdyR4aJyfSfcKh6i
🍍HELP SUPPORT THE SHOW🍍 You can shop for your favourite fertility support products over on: Seeking Health:https://bit.ly/FFSeekingHealth & Amazon:http://bit.ly/FindingFertilityAmazon
Anything written or said about health and diet are my opinions, that I have formed over the years, through trial and error, study, reading, listening and observing. What worked for me, may not work for you. I am not a doctor, nutritionist or dietician and all medical advice should be gotten from a qualified professional. Product recommendations are based on what I used during my infertility journey or wish I had.
9 min