Get Ready With God

I share a newly articulated belief that's reshaping how I follow God: everything He asks of me is for my own good. Not because He needs something from me, but because He doesn't need anything at all. I unpack my past season of atheism, what I used to get wrong about jealousy and commandments, and why choosing this as a baseline assumption makes trust a whole lot easier.

I used to believe that following God meant things would eventually go the way I wanted. Then the worst years of my life happened while I was trying the hardest. This is what I learned about prayer, entitlement, and what it actually means to trust God when He does not give you the miracle you asked for.

I have seen this pattern wreck people in their careers. I have seen it wreck people in their faith. And I have done both. This episode is about the moment you stop demanding that God, or your religion, or your marriage, or your motherhood owe you something and start realizing the power you actually have to choose your own way.

This episode might not be for you. If you're already self-sacrificing to the point of destruction, skip this one. But I have to be honest about what has actually saved me, because I can't tell you anything different. Every time I've hit a breaking point and prayed to be rescued, the answer has been more. More service, more sacrifice. And it has worked every single time.

I spoke on unchangeable worth at a conference while privately struggling to feel my own. Then flew across the country to speak on grief with strangers and felt more at home than I did in my own city. It was a good reminder. The path God actually calls us to walk is not always the one people approve of. That's not evidence it's wrong. But there is a cost. And the only way through it is going back to the source.

There was a time when dissonance felt like a reason to opt out. I did it with faith for years. But we're past that. Dissonance is in every relationship, every job, every person. You can't opt out of everything. So we might as well learn to hold it, because when we do, things get deeper, not harder. That's been true in my faith, my marriage, and honestly, my feelings about AI.

I spent months waiting for God to tell me what to quit. Nothing came. So I just started quitting things, one by one, and the guidance showed up in the action. Not before it. Waiting on God can quietly become non-action, and black and white thinking about right and wrong can paralyze us completely. God trusts you. The question is whether you trust yourself.

Noah Kahn can articulate something without knowing how to fix it. So can I. Being able to name a feeling is not the same as having the answer, and I think we've been wrong about what counts as valuable. God rarely hands me a solution. He hands me creativity, relationships, experiences. We're not only here to solve for x. We're here to build the equation.

We need to stop giving Satan so much credit. Resistance is normal. Hard things are normal. And framing other people's agency as darkness working against you is a wild way to live. Maybe Suzanne from down the street just disagrees with you. That's not a spiritual attack. My calendar is full. Satan is not on the agenda.

The whole point of working on your insecurities is not self-love for its own sake. It's so you can be trusted. It's so you can show up for other people without being threatened by them. When I can get to that place of genuinely rooting for someone, seeing their gifts clearly, no jealousy, no agenda, that's the closest I've felt to seeing someone the way God sees them. And if I can believe it for them, I can start to believe it for myself.