Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually Takes

Getting Comfortable with Being Uncomfortable: Life Changes in Friendships


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Picture this. You’ve been friends with somebody for 40 years. You’ve always lived close by.

Then, one of you moves across the world. Suddenly you have to Zoom to stay in touch – but talking online with somebody you’re used to sitting on a couch with feels uncomfortable. You might think there’s something wrong with your friendship. The reality? This is just a new way of connecting.

Today’s guest, Ivana Ivanek, an online business coach and podcast host of Fabulous by Design, and I talk about the evolving ways we connect and spend time with our friends. She shares vulnerably about how her move abroad to follow her dreams impacted her friendships.

It has me thinking about my own friendships that feel sticky, and I think a lot of people will identify with her same frustrations. Why is it so hard to connect with this friend I’m so close to? How can we change our ways of connecting? How can we lean into this discomfort to make it work?

In this episode you’ll hear about:

  • Ivana’s move from Austria to experience her dream and live by the sea – and the struggles she found maintaining long-distance friends with the time zone differences 
  • The “online isn’t real” myth, and how to build fulfilling online connections by being ACTIVE and intentional about your interactions
  • Getting out of our comfort zones to maintain friendships and the feeling of not staying true to old friends by making new connections
  • How highly-sensitive people might actually find connecting with people online less draining than in person
  • Why it’s so easy to have all-consuming friendships as kids – and why it doesn’t always work that way as adults

Resources & Links

Check out Ivana’s podcast, Fabulous by Design, which I recently was a guest on and follow along on Instagram.

Like what you hear? Visit my website, leave me a voicemail, and follow me on Instagram

Want to take this conversation a step further? Send this episode to a friend. Tell them you found it interesting and use what we just talked about as a conversation starter the next time you and your friend hang out!

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Friendship IRL: Real Talk About Friendship, Community, and What It Actually TakesBy Alex Alexander

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