The war between so-called pro-choice and pro-life forces in America seem divided beyond repair. But where does that leave women who have made the often painful and important decision to have an abortion? As Kassi Underwood says, they are left with a choice between regret and relief, with few opportunities to talk about the experience and feel supported in their personal struggles. Kassi knows from personal experience that needing to hide all the sometimes complex feelings left after an abortion has a greater chance of fracturing women than the abortion itself. For even necessary losses are still losses, deserving our ear and calling for our attention. With great humor and fierce honesty, Kassi Underwood takes us along on her own search for answers and, in the process, helps us to think more deeply about this important subject.

Kassi Underwood’s work has been published in The New York Times, The Atlantic online, The Rumpus, and Refinery29.  She holds an MFA in literary nonfiction from Columbia University, where she taught on the faculty of the Undergraduate Writing Program. In 2012, she won Exhale's Pro-Voice Storyteller Award in recognition of her personal essays on abortion; in 2013, she traveled across the United States, sharing her journey after abortion in an effort to bring peace to the abortion war. Described by audiences as “part-storyteller, part-public speaker, and part performance artist,” Kassi gives talks on the spirituality of abortion, addiction recovery, personal transformation, and social justice nationwide. She has addressed Christian churches and liberal arts colleges, shared a stage with standup comedians Amy Schumer and Sarah Silverman, and appeared as a guest on MSNBC and HuffPost Live. She lives with her husband in Cambridge, Massachusetts, where she is a student at Harvard Divinity School and cohost of the podcast, Spiritually Blonde.

Across the great divide in America, city dwellers and the nation's farmers often fail to understand each other. Marie Mutsuki Mockett set out to close the gap, going back to the place in Nebraska where her family owns a farm and listening with her whole heart to the many of the men and women who raise the food that keeps all of us alive; midwest rural America. She travelled to seven states to participate with them in harvest. In the process, her ideas, assumptions and beliefs were challenged, leaving an indelible mark on her heart and mind. When we are able to truly listen to each other, how does it affect our view of the world? Does it lead to greater understanding and tolerance? How can we be true to ourselves while truly respecting the other person? Marie comes back from the heartland with some answers and many questions, inviting us to share with her a profound lesson in acceptance. Launching as we are all facing the effects of COVID-19, the book is timely in that it also takes a look at front line workers who help keep our food supply open.

Marie Motsuki Mockett is a novelist and memoirist. Born and raised in California to a Japanese mother and American father, she graduated from Columbia University. Her memoir, Where the Dead Pause and the Japanese Say Goodbye, explores how the Japanese cope with grief and tragedy. Her essay, Letter from a Japanese Crematorium, was anthologized in Norton’s Best Creative Nonfiction. Her first novel, Picking Bones from Ash, was was a finalist for the Paterson Prize. She’s written for many publications including The New York Times and has been a guest on The World, Talk of the Nation and All Things Considered. Her new book, “American Harvest,” is set in seven agricultural and heartland states and was a finalist for the Lukas Prize for Nonfiction. Marie received her MFA from the Bennington Writers Seminars and teaches fiction and nonfiction at the Rainier Writing Workshop, in Tacoma, Washington is a Visiting Writer in the MFA program at Saint Mary’s College.

Susan Hayden experienced three sudden losses that shaped her life; her childhood best friend, her father and her husband. How did she shape these losses into the creative voice she crafted over a lifetime? How did they change her? Going forward from loss, what do we take with us and what do we leave behind? Her first published memoir, Now You Are a Missing Person, makes poetry of loss, showing us how to integrate our love into a new creation.

Susan Hayden is a poet, playwright, novelist, and essayist. Her plays have been performed live on KPFK’s Pacifica Performance Showcase and produced at the Met Theatre, Padua Playwrights, The Lost Studio and elsewhere. Her poems and stories have been published in numerous anthologies, including Beat Not Beat from Moon Tide Press, The Black Body from Seven Stories Press, and bestselling Los Angeles In the 1970s/Weird Scenes Inside the Goldmine from Rare Bird Books. She was a Finalist in the Inaugural Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award with Penguin Press for her unpublished novel, Cat Stevens Saved My Life. Hayden is the creator and producer of Library Girl, a monthly words and music series now in its 14th year at Ruskin Group Theatre. In 2015, she was presented with the Artist in the Community/Bruria Finkel Award from the Santa Monica Arts Foundation for her significant contributions to the energetic discourse within Santa Monica’s arts community. You can find her at susanhayden.com.

Abbe Greenberg and Maggie Sarachek have literally written the book on supporting yourself through anxiety and panic attacks. And of course, they tried it ALL to deal with their own anxiety, because experience is the best teacher! Join us to talk about how they each experienced anxiety, what they did to address it, and what it is like to support others through the same struggle. So much is lost as a result of anxiety; our freedoms, our sense of well-being, relationships and time! But confronting anxiety is possible and, through the process, we can develop a kinder attitude towards all our struggles.

What leads us to explore our relationship to death? For Angela Fama, it began when a terrible accident caused her to consider her own death. But she noticed that when she tried to talk about death, she met discomfort and resistance. Instead of dropping the conversation, she searched for ways to enter into it; to make others more comfortable with the subject. Out of this need of hers, the Death Conversation Game was born!

Angela Fama (she/they) is the creator of Death Conversation Game and facilitator of Let’s Talk About Death. They are also an interdisciplinary artist, photographer, musician, and aspiring death doula. In their praxis, Fama focuses on the inner and outer connections that can be made pushing at the edges of the barriers surrounding ‘sticky’ subjects (such as trauma, identity, love, and death). Born on The Farm in Tennessee, they were raised in Ontario and Zimbabwe, and currently reside on the unceded traditional territories of the Coast Salish xʷməθkʷəy̓əm, Sḵwx̱wú7mesh, and Sel̓íl̓witulh Nations (Vancouver, Canada). They work from an intersectional feminist perspective valuing equity, inclusive of all genders, sexual orientations, abilities, races, religions, and classes.

Some believe that dying people increasingly speak nonsense, losing their grip on reality. But Lisa Smartt, a linguist trained to pay deep attention to words, realized as her father was dying that what he was saying was coherent and deeply moving, pointing to a world which she little understood and inviting an exploration of what he might be talking about. After his death, she hurtled headlong into a mission; collecting final words, convinced they had something profound to offer those of us who are not dying. The Final Words Project and her book, Words at the Threshhold: What We Say as We're Nearing Death, are the beautiful result. I was honored to be quoted in this beautiful book!

Lisa Smartt, MA, is the author of Words at the Threshold. A linguist, educator, and poet, she founded the Final Words Project, an ongoing study devoted to collecting and interpreting the mysterious language at the end of lives. She co-facilitates workshops about language and consciousness with Raymond Moody at universities, hospices, and conferences and lives in the San Francisco Bay Area. Visit her online at http://www.finalwordsproject.org.

I admire this woman so much! That's why I am running this episode again.

Women of color are reliably at the forefront of every progressive movement, both in sheer numbers and in activism. Yet there are many factors that limit their leadership and put an undue burden on them, resulting in a loss to the movements themselves. Former Groundswell Fund founder and executive Vanessa Priya Daniel knows first hand the toll these underlysing factors take. She also interiewed some of the most groundbreaking leaders and has written a profound book about what holds back our most capable leaders, and what we can all do to shift the tide.

Vanessa Priya Daniel has worked in social justice movements for 25 years as a labor and community organizer, writer, researcher, and funder. The heart of her work is connecting people and resources to achieve vibrant grassroots power and realize a multiracial, feminist democracy.  She is the founder of Groundswell Fund (a 501c3), and Groundswell Action Fund (a 501c4), two leading funders of organizations led by women of color, and transgender people. Under her leadership, Groundswell moved over $100M to the field, centering intersectional grassroots organizing led by women of color and using a breakthrough philanthropic model that featured supermajorities of women of color movement leaders and former grassroots organizers on its staff and boards of directors. During her tenure, more than 40 foundations and over 2,000 individual donors relied on Groundswell to help them move resources to 200+ organizations at the grassroots.  Groundswell received the National Committee of Responsible Philanthropy’s “Impact Award” for smashing issue silos.  Vanessa was featured in the Chronicle of Philanthropy as one of 15 “Influencers” who are changing the non-profit world and named by Inside Philanthropy as one of their “Top 100 Most Powerful Players in Philanthropy”. She is the recipient of the 2022 Smith Medal from her alma mater Smith College, the 2017 National Network of Abortion Funds’ Abortion Action Vanguard Award, and the 2012 Gerbode Foundation Fellowship. Her writing has appeared in the New York Times and the San Francisco Bay Guardian, among other publications and her first book, Unrig the Game: What Women of Color Can Teach Everyone About Winning. is being published by Random House in 2025.  Vanessa has organized homecare workers with SEIU; helped win a landmark living wage law with the East Bay Alliance for a Sustainable Economy; and conducted research to support the organizing efforts of welfare mothers with the Applied Research Center (now Race Forward). Currently, through her firm, Vanessa Daniel Consulting, LLC, she offers strategic advising and coaching support to donors, foundations, grassroots organizations and organizational leaders. She serves on the boards of directors of the National LGBTQ Task Force and Common Counsel Foundation, and on the Advisory Board/Brain Trust of the Kataly Foundation’s Environmental Justice Resource Collective, and the Democracy Frontline Fund. She is currently a fellow with the Decolonizing Wealth Project. Vanessa and her co-parent Tricia, are mothers to two daughters, ages five and thirteen.

A week before their wedding, Kate Truitt's fiancee died unexpectedly. In deep grief and trauma she saw no way forward and, even as an informed investigator of the way trauma affects us, she could only live the reality. It was a very long time before she could see the potential for growth and flourishing. In telling her story she invites us along on her path of discovery; her road back to herself. We also share her evolution into the person we see now; someone who supports others going through the same thing she did.

Bio: Dr. Kate Truitt Kate is an esteemed clinical psychologist and neuroscientist who is internationally acclaimed for her trauma, stress, and resilience expertise. As the founder of the Truitt Institute, she integrates cutting-edge neuroscience into mental health training and seminars. She also leads Dr. Kate Truitt & Associates and serves as CEO of both the Amy Research Foundation and the Trauma Counseling Center of Los Angeles. Her voice in the mental health arena extends to her role as a sought-after speaker and expert in media, including features on BBC and Today. Dr. Truitt has delivered keynotes and training at prestigious platforms like the United Nations and the United States Department of Defense. As the author of "Healing in Your Hands" and "Keep Breathing," she is dedicated to advancing the treatment of trauma and stress disorders, making significant strides in destigmatizing mental health and fostering resilience worldwide.

On a day like any other, Jonathan Santlofer was suddenly dropped into the chaos of intense grief when his wife of 40 years suddenly died. His losses before this did not prepare him for his upended life. It did not prepare him for the insensitive and alienating things people said to him when he was too vulnerable to respond. It did not prepare him for the internal conflict of whether and how much to share about his intense mourning. He also had the sense that his inability to share his feelings and ask for help were deeply affected by the expectations he felt because he is a man. How did gender affect people's expectations of what would happen next? How much of that was a conflict within his own heart? He found an anchor in writing down what he was experiencing. In his notebooks he was able to say it all, and to hear himself. And ultimately, the lifeline he found in writing became a beautiful book, A Widower's Notebook.

Jonathan Santlofer is the author of the memoir, THE WIDOWER’S NOTEBOOK, released this month by Penguin books. AS well as being an author, Jonathan is also an artist. He has published 5 novels, including the best selling “The Death Art,” and the award-winning “Anatomy of Fear,” and numerous short stories. He has been both editor and contributor for 6 notable anthologies, among them the New York Times bestseller, “Inherit the Dead,” and recently, Touchstone/Simon & Schuster “IT OCCURS TO ME THAT I AM AMERICA,” a collection of original stories and art. He has taught art and writing at Columbia University, Pratt Institute, and the Center For Fiction, where he created Crime Fiction Academy. His artwork is in major public and private collections in the US and abroad. Jonathan has been the recipient of numerous grants and awards, among them two National Endowment for the Arts grants, Visiting Artist at the American Academy in Rome, and he serves on the board of Yaddo, one of the oldest arts organizations in the US.

Adoption is a loss that often lives in the shadows, both in the world and inside of adoptees. Losing everything you've ever known before there are even words to name it, when you are an absorbent, unformed human being can take a lifetime to understand. But it is only by recognizing the loss that adoptees can claim their birthright; a life of beauty and meaning. Michelle Madrid knows this territory from both directions. She is an adoptee and an adoptive mother. She dedicates herself to helping other adoptees claim all the parts of themselves, including the ones they were before they lost their first family. Join us as we talk about all sides of the an adoption and how we can all support adopted people to claim every part of themselves.