Heart On My Sleeve

This episode's guest is Sarah Wilson - author of "I Quit Sugar", journalist, TV host, environmental activist. Sarah lives with Bipolar disorder, OCD and Hashimoto's disease.

We cover:

• How do you know when anxiety is your super power
• Her George Costanza moment of doing the opposite and how it saved her life
• The importance of "the wrestle" - how we aren't focussing on resilience enough in our approach to mental health
• We unpack what it means to "do anxiety once"
• Why Sarah trusts anxious people more than non-anxious people
• 2 tools she uses to reduce her anxiety
• The 1 thing she let go of and the 1 thing she gained that changed her life
• Mitch shared what he believes is the first step in everyone's journey to living with anxiety
• What it was like getting her first mental ill health diagnosis at age 12
• Living with Bipolar including full manic episodes, OCD and Hashimoto's disease (autoimmune issue that causes thyroid dysfunction)
• Described her ultimate breakdown and what that looked - including the moment where she said "I am ready to go"
• Don’t wait until the dark night of the soul before you make a change - you don’t need to have a dramatic moment
• The benefits of minimalism and being able to carry your whole life in a single bag

About Mitch's Mum

• Grew up working class, raised Mitch as a single mother in his early years
• Fought her way into a better life for both of them
• Had her second child when Mitch was 15
• Gina is now a successful sales manager at a large technology company
• "She is the best person ever" Mitch

In this episode we cover:

• Independence vs. safety - how do we navigate taking care of a child but empowering autonomy - especially when a mental health issue is present in the child
• #1 thing she did that helped me during that time
• Early warning signs and cues that she wished she saw in me
• The #1 warning sign she wished she saw earlier that she believes is an early indicator to anxiety
• The #1 game to play with your child to help counter anxious thoughts
• 2 tips to balance being firm and being compassionate
• How to balance being a friend vs. being a parent - how to get that right
• Teenage angst vs. something more serious - the answer to knowing if it's clinical
• Post-natal depression twice - what it felt like for her without even knowing she had it and the reality of feeling trapped
• A discussion on whether or not it's good to talk to children about big questions like values and what you believe in from an early age
• Talking to her not wanting to let her down by telling her I wasn’t ok
• The benefits of writing a life narrative and sitting down with your parents to talk it through - re-write your story through their story
• To medicate or not to medicate your child when facing a mental health issue (*seek medical advice)
• What is the end goal of mental health

Book Mitch to speak at your workplace www.mitchwallis.com 

In this episode:

- Parenting pitfalls and how to avoid passing on your insecurities to your children
- The science of presence and how it can be used to overcome trauma
- How being "real" is not just an ethical choice, but a psychological benefit
Dr Dan Siegel
Daniel J. Siegel received his medical degree from Harvard University and completed his postgraduate medical education at UCLA with training in pediatrics and child, adolescent and adult psychiatry.  He served as a National Institute of Mental Health Research Fellow at UCLA, studying family interactions with an emphasis on how attachment experiences influence emotions, behavior, autobiographical memory and narrative. Dr. Siegel is a clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine and the founding co-director of the Mindful Awareness Research Center at UCLA. An award-winning educator, he is a Distinguished Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association and recipient of several honorary fellowships. Dr. Siegel is also the Executive Director of the Mindsight Institute, an educational organization, which offers online learning and in-person seminars that focus on how the development of mindsight in individuals, families and communities can be enhanced by examining the interface of human relationships and basic biological processes. His psychotherapy practice includes children, adolescents, adults, couples, and families. He serves as the Medical Director of the LifeSpan Learning Institute and on the Advisory Board of the Blue School in New York City, which has built its curriculum around Dr. Siegel’s Mindsight approach.

In this episode:

• A world leading expert on attachment psychology gives us a masterclass in how relationships affect our brain
• A Harvard psychologist perspective on why mental health is so bad in our modern world
• We disclose the #1 thing that can affect your mental health
• The 5 attributes of giving secure attachment to others those we care about
• How to overcome conflict and ruptures in relationships through boundaries
• How we can become more mature in our ow=n emotional regulation
• An exploration of child development and the different relational maps as we grow up
• Top psychological traits of high performers and how to cultivate peak states
• Neuroscience insights into attention and how it relates to ADHD
• How parents can “wander out loud” about their kids to help them learn about their mind
• The subtle nuances of meditation to make sure it “works”

About Dr Daniel P Brown 

Dr. Brown is an Associate Clinical Professor in Psychology at Harvard Medical School. He has served on the Harvard Medical School faculty for 37 years. He is the senior author of a major textbook on the treatment of attachment disorders in adults, D Brown & D Elliott, Attachment Disturbances in Adults. He has served as an expert witness in the courts in over two hundred lawsuits relating to psychological damages from trauma and abuse; His work as an expert witness or consultant on trauma and memory has included testimony before of International War Crimes Tribunal. He has studied under leading eastern meditation teachers (even meditation originators i.e. people who developed the actual practice itself) and has spent 46 years translating meditation texts from Tibetan and Sanskrit into English. He has the only scientific study identifying the neurocircuitry of the meditative experience of awakened mind. Dr. Brown’s background in both Western psychology and Eastern meditation traditions offers a unique integration of the contemporary Western research on peak performance and positive psychology and the classical Buddhist meditation lineage traditions.

In this episode:
- what it was like to grow up having a worldwide spiritual guru as a parent
- Mallika shares incredibly beautiful insights around the power of gratitude and what setting an intent really means (beyond just what we may have read in books like The Secret).
- We discuss the usually messy and sometimes dark journey of figuring out who we really are and what we really want
- Mallika gives some invaluable advice and perspectives on parenting, and of course, meditation.

About Mallika Chopra
Mallika Chopra is one of the most prolific meditation teachers in the world. She has spoken at TedXSan Diego and TedXBerkeley, Ideacity, Business Innovation Factory, Wisdom 2.0, Women’s Conferences around the United States, and the Parliament of World Religions. She has been featured in Time Magazine’s Special Issue on Mindfulness, as well as Women’s Health, Oprah.com, Mind Body Green, and Huffington Post. She has worked with companies such as Coca Cola, Disney, LinkedIn and Google. Mallika has published several books – including her most recent project called 'Just Breathe: Meditation, Mindfulness, Movement and More' where she empowers 8-12 year old kids to learn how to deal with stress, sleep better, build self-confidence, and manage the anxiety so many of them face today. She also wrote the book 'Living With Intent: My Somewhat Messy Journey to Purpose, Peace and Joy'. A lot of people would be familiar with her father Deepak Chopra – a.k.a. male Oprah Winfrey. He is essentially the face of self-help globally and a large reason why meditation is mainstream in today’s Western world.

Today's guest is Margo Lydon. In this episode we cover:

• The most recent insights relating to corporate mental health in Australia from the country's largest wellbeing survey
• An overview of the 5 core domains of a thriving workplace
• What some organisations aren't doing well to support their staff (and what they could be doing more right)
• How COVID has impacted Australian workers (with a surprising finding)
• What leaders can do to serve their team more effectively

About Margo Lydon
Margo has been working in mental health and suicide prevention for 20 years. She is the CEO of SuperFriend - one of Australia's leading Workplace Mental Health Organisations. Margo holds a Master of Science, Positive Organization Development and Change and a Bachelor of Business Degree (Marketing). She was a finalist in the 2019 Telstra Business Women’s Awards (Victoria) in the “For Purpose and Social Enterprise” category.

In this episode we cover:
- A real story from a successful black man who has experienced racism his whole life to humanise the reality of racism in the 21st century
- The difference between white privilege & racism
- What we can do to help lift up our black brothers & sisters and do small acts to push society forward
- How the Black Lives Matter Movement extends beyond an issue of police brutality
- An exploration of the incarceration issue and the layers that build up to perpetuate or perception a stigma over time
- The “child state” of trauma that can last into adulthood and how parenting can have such a big impact on this

This episode’s guest is Pervis Taylor, III, M.A. Pervis is an award-winning celebrity life coach, speaker and author of “Pervis Principles” Volumes 1&2 and “Single Man, Married Man”. As a result of his own trauma, Pervis has dedicated his life to the betterment of one's mental and emotional growth. Through his honing methods, he continues to transform the lives of his extensive client roster that reaches both celebrities, executives, organisations and most importantly inner city youth by pinpointing their needs and goals. Pervis has his Bachelors in marketing from University of Miami and his Masters in Clinical Psychology from Columbia University.

Meet Liz, a Tax Partner at PWC in Texas who gets very real about her experiences with anxiety, clinical depression, medication and OCD. Liz was naturally good at everything she turned her hand to, including mastering the art of living an inauthentic life to please others. Her goal was to be seen and liked. And she was, but it was for the person she thought they wanted her to be, so she had to keep her “true” thoughts and compulsions hidden. She openly talks about her relationship with external validation and how it’s the strongest drug we can come across, as we permanently chase that high to feel loved more than anything else. True to form, Liz is now a leader in driving awareness of mental ill health, particularly in the corporate space.

Topics covered:

• The danger of masking our insecurities with relentless positivity
• Liz’s breakthrough moment of knowing how to combat her obsessive thoughts and impulsive behaviour
• How external validation is limitless and has no rock bottom

This is the link to the “demon duck of doom” that Liz mentioned at the end - https://cutt.ly/vlF6tQC

Liz’s blog - https://seriouslyjerkbrain.com/2020/01/08/beautiful-mind-jerky-brain/

Matt became paraplegic after severing his spine during an attempt to end his life. Months and years of physical and mental rehabilitation have seen him completely transform his mindset. Today, Matt is a motivational speaker and mindset coach, particularly influential among his generation, and is on an incredible comeback to walk again.

Topics covered:

• The existential curiosity he had at an early age, which saw him carve out a double life.
• How he has found purpose and meaning since attempting to take his life.
• His refusal to accept medical predictions that he’d never walk again.
• The mindfulness practices he utilizes every day to ensure his ongoing wellbeing.

Jake grew up with a single mum, and even as a child, he took on the role of “the man’ in the house. When his stepdad came along, things were ok for a while, but later Jake would have to endure the fear and anger of living with an unstable parent figure. Jake escaped to pursue his own life of travel and adventure and became qualified as a chef. Later, in his mid-twenties, when he was just starting to thrive in his new career as a personal trainer, a tragic motorcycle accident nearly claimed his life. Toward the end of his months of recovery, he was told he had throat cancer.

Mitch and Jake talk openly about how he survived through it all and how he is continually challenging himself to improve and pursue physical and mental health.

Topics covered:

• Feeling unsafe at home in a household where there is drugs and violence
• A sense of masculinity. How we grasp at it, lean into it and adapt to threats to it.
• Surviving a motorcycle accident, which left him in recovery for months
• Receiving a cancer diagnosis while still in rehabilitation from the accident

The music Jake mentions at the end is by @lukasmac and has been a guiding light for his recovery.