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Is there a timeline for saving a marriage?

If you are asking "How long will it take to save my marriage?" the honest answer is that there is no magic formula or set number of days. It relies entirely on consistency over time. In this video, Dr. Joe Beam explains that saving a relationship is not an immediate event. It is a process of changing the negative narrative your spouse has about you by consistently doing the right things, even when it feels like it is not working.

In this episode:

Dr. Joe Beam breaks down the typical pattern of marriage dissolution and shares the hard truth about separation. Did you know that once a physical separation occurs, the likelihood of divorce rises to between 75% and 80%?

Dr. Beam explains why this happens using a concept called Negative Affect. This is when your spouse interprets everything you do through a negative filter. Even when you try to change or work on your PIES (Physical, Intellectual, Emotional, Spiritual attraction), your spouse might attack you or criticize you.

Why do they do this? Because your positive changes are messing up the negative narrative they have created to justify leaving.

You will learn:

• The typical "devolving" pattern of a marriage heading toward divorce.
• Why you should avoid or delay separation if at all possible.
• Negative Affect: Why your spouse sees you as the "bad guy" regardless of what you do.
• Why your spouse might get angry when you start working on yourself.
• The vital importance of consistency over time to change their mind.

It is unfair that you have to do the heavy lifting right now. However, if you are the one standing for the marriage, you are the one who has to change the dynamic. It is not easy, but we have witnessed "hopeless" couples turn it around even after years of struggle.

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