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The holidays can fill a room with warmth, noise, and nostalgia—and still leave one partner quietly overwhelmed. We dig into the messy middle where alcohol meets family rituals, social anxiety, and the pressure to keep everything magical for kids. Through a candid case study of Heath and Bailey, we unpack why couples get stuck arguing over “how many drinks” while missing the deeper issue: presence and shared responsibility.

We explore the common reasons people drink at festive gatherings—soothing awkwardness, enhancing joy, numbing grief—and show how a quick pour can shift from choice to reflex. Instead of counting glasses, we focus on what actually protects connection: clarity, planning, and agreed signals. You’ll hear a practical set of questions to map your approach before events: whether to drink at all, who drives, what limits feel respectful, how to read each other’s signals, and what you want your kids to observe about adult decision-making. We also talk openly about family addiction history, genetic risk, and how to avoid shame while still taking risk seriously.

Our goal is simple: help you design holidays where you remain reachable to yourself and each other, even in crowded rooms. Expect straight talk about boundaries that don’t feel controlling, compassion for the partner who leans on a drink to get through, and concrete ways to replace reactivity with choice. If you’ve had the same argument on the drive home year after year, this conversation offers a path to alignment you can actually use at the next gathering.

If this resonates, follow the show and leave a rating. Share this episode with someone who needs a calmer holiday plan, and tell us: what’s one agreement you’ll try at your next celebration?

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