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By Megan Ashley
Welcome to "In Totality," where host, Megan Ashley guides Christians on the journey of living a life that's wholly devoted to God. Through vulnerability and transparency, Megan shares her wisdom ro
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The podcast currently has 217 episodes available.
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Hey Guys! This week on In Totality, I’m back with Jay, Jordan, and Nicole in my new home, reflecting on God’s faithfulness through a long season of prayer, waiting, closed doors, and unexpected provision. For nearly two years, I prayed about where my boys and I should live, where they should attend school, and what God’s next step was for our family. There were opportunities that fell through, moments when we came close, and times when I wondered whether I had discerned God’s will correctly. But while it felt like nothing was happening, God was preparing details, and people I couldn’t see. If you’re waiting for God to move in a relationship, job opportunity, health situation, a relocation decision, or any other unanswered prayer, this episode is for you. My prayer is that this conversation encourages you to stay close to the Lord, remain faithful with what He has already placed in your hands, and trust that He is working even when you cannot see it. God is always working! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week, Jordan, Jay, and Nic join in for a conversation about spiritual warfare, repentance, and what it means to put on the full armor of God every day. After reflecting on the battles the Lord has carried us through, I realized that endurance is not passive. Sometimes we become so weary in our faithfulness that we stop fighting. Other times, we become so confident about the battles we’ve already survived that we stop guarding ourselves. Both can leave us spiritually vulnerable. We unpack 2 Samuel 11 and the moment David remained in Jerusalem when kings were expected to go to war. What began with being somewhere he was not supposed to be led to lust, sexual sin, deception, murder, and months of unrepentance. David’s story reminds us why we must remain engaged in the fight, confess quickly, and never assume that past victories make us immune to temptation. If you’re experiencing spiritual warfare, faithful fatigue, inconsistency, shame over sin, or weariness from fighting one battle after another, I pray this conversation encourages you. Seriousness does not mean joylessness, and devotion does not mean perfection. When you don’t feel strong enough to fight, be honest with the Lord and ask Him to help you want what He wants. Keep fighting. Look to Jesus, hold tightly to His promises, and remember that you do not have to fight in your own strength. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey Fam! In Totality is back this week and I'm here with the team for a conversation about forgiveness, anger, and the call of Romans 12: “Vengeance belongs to Me; I will repay.” Forgiveness sounds beautiful until the wound is fresh and the apology never comes. So, today, I open up about my struggle with wanting to defend myself, have the last word, or “get a lick back” when I feel wronged. We unpack what it looks like to trust God as our defender, lay the urge to retaliate on the altar, and surrender the outcome instead of waiting for God to “get them” on our behalf. We also talk through the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation, why forgiveness doesn’t mean ignoring abuse or automatically restoring access, and how hurt can turn into anger, defensiveness, or the urge to clap back. The team shares what it looks like to pause, pray, name the real wound, and invite the Holy Spirit into hard conversations. If you’re struggling to forgive someone who hurt you, waiting for an apology you may never receive, wrestling with bitterness, or trying to handle conflict in a way that honors Christ, this episode is for you. My prayer is that this conversation helps you release the need for revenge, overcome evil with good, and trust God with the offense and the outcome. You can acknowledge what was wrong and still choose grace. Let God be your defender. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week on the show Jay, Jordan, Nicole and I talk through the difference between vengeance and vindication, what Scripture says about loving our enemies, and how remembering the mercy we’ve received through Christ changes the way we respond to offense. One question really challenged me: What if our vindication actually looks like having peace, sleeping at night, and continuing in what God has called us to do? We discuss how unforgiveness can hide behind time and distance. Just because you’ve stopped speaking to someone doesn’t mean you’ve released what happened. Forgiveness can take prayer, wrestling, and surrender, and forgiving someone doesn’t require staying in a harmful relationship. If you’re struggling with betrayal, bitterness, a broken friendship, or the need to prove you were right, I pray this conversation helps you bring that hurt honestly before the Lord. Before you move on with your day, pause and ask Him: “Lord, is there anyone I haven’t truly forgiven? Search my heart and help me surrender what I’m still holding.” See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Deconstructing Christianity isn’t always the same as walking away from God. Sometimes it could mean examining legalism, controlling traditions, or inherited beliefs so we can understand what Scripture actually teaches. But what happens when we stop deconstructing false teaching and begin deconstructing the truth itself, rebuilding faith around our comfort, desires, or the opinions of people we admire online? This week, I'm back with the team to talk about faith deconstruction, and the responsibility that comes with Christian Influence. Together, we discuss testing every voice against God’s Word, the consequence that comes with identifying, publicly, as a Christian, and why platform size does not determine whether you have influence. The question is: Are our words pointing others toward Christ or giving them permission to compromise? If you’re navigating doubt, or, stewarding a platform of your own, this episode is for you! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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