Jeff was born in San Francisco in October 1962. He was relinquished at birth and placed with his adoptive family three months later, in January 1963. His family moved from the Bay Area to Southern California when he was five years old. His older sister was also adopted, and both children grew up in a caring, loving home. They were informed of their adoptions at an early age, and the topic was always discussed positively anytime afterward. Nevertheless, specific challenges often faced by adopted children led to behavioral issues for Jeff as a teen. Chameleon syndrome's survival mechanism existed strongly in Jeff, and his self-perceived failure to replicate the behaviors, emotions, and interests of those around him led to struggles with shame and substance abuse. Years later, a conversation with a colleague who had an adopted child enlightened Jeff to the PTSD associated with adoption and helped him reconcile his conflicted adolescence. Discovery of legal adoption documents and non-identifying information following his adoptive mother's death in 2004 piqued Jeff’s interest in his biological family. Research went slowly at first, but took off quickly after another colleague introduced him to 23andme in 2017. Immersive exploration led to ancestral revelations, and meetings with aunts and cousins led to some big surprises.

Season 12 Book: The Adoption Paradox by Jean Kelly Widner

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RESOURCES for Adoptees:

Adoptees Connect

Adoptee Mentoring Society

Gregory Luce and Adoptee Rights Law

Kristal Parke Because She Is Adopted

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