Legally Clueless

This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle explores a question many of us rarely ask ourselves:

Who are you beyond your wounds?

As women, we're often praised for how much we can endure. We celebrate resilience, sacrifice, and survival. But what happens when pain becomes the primary way we understand ourselves? In this episode, Adelle unpacks why so many women build identities around struggle, why suffering is often mistaken for strength, and how pain can quietly become the centre of our lives.

She also explores the radical possibility that joy, delight, pleasure, beauty, and aliveness are not rewards we earn after healing, they are part of what it means to be human. If you've ever found yourself defining yourself by what you've survived, this episode is an invitation to imagine who you might be beyond your pain.

In this episode:

• How pain can become part of our identity
• Why women are often rewarded for suffering
• The difference between honouring pain and living inside it
• How struggle becomes a measure of worth
• Why joy, delight and pleasure deserve a place in our lives
• The question every healing journey must eventually answer: What am I healing toward?

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When Jeanette Soi was growing up, school became a place where she slowly began to question her worth. In this deeply relatable episode, Jeanette shares memories of being publicly shamed for her grades, experiencing favoritism from teachers, and carrying the painful belief that her academic performance determined her future.

As teachers and classmates repeatedly reinforced the idea that she wasn't smart enough, she began to internalize those messages and doubt herself. But behind her was a family that never stopped believing in her. This is part one of Jeanette's story.

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What if the things women have been taught to “just endure” are actually signs that something is wrong?

In this season finale of For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango is joined by Consultant Obstetrician & Gynecologist Dr Claire Kinuthia for one of the most important conversations we’ve had on the show.Together, they unpack menstrual cycles, PMS, PMDD, PCOS, fibroids, endometriosis, perimenopause and menopause, while also exploring the ways women’s pain has historically been minimized and dismissed in medicine.

This episode is eye-opening, affirming and deeply necessary for every woman trying to better understand her body.

Listen to Dr Claire’s podcast:
Circling the Rabbit Hole Podcast https://www.instagram.com/ctrh_podcast/ 

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nstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.clairekinuthia/

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This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle Onyango unpacks the different kinds of rest and why sleep alone may not be fixing your exhaustion. So many of us are burnt out in ways we haven’t learned to name. We sleep, take breaks, scroll online, binge shows and still feel tired. Why? Because not all exhaustion is physical.

In this episode, Adelle explores the 7 different types of rest, from emotional rest and sensory rest to creative, mental, social, physical, and spiritual rest, and how chronic overstimulation, emotional labor, burnout, and constant productivity culture are affecting our wellbeing.

This episode is a reminder that rest is not laziness. It is restoration. Listen if you’ve been feeling:

• emotionally drained
• mentally exhausted
• overstimulated
• creatively burnt out
• disconnected from yourself
• tired no matter how much you sleep

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In this episode of the Legally Clueless podcast, Annitah Rae shares the second part of her deeply personal story. She opens up about surviving domestic violence in her marriage, becoming a young mother, struggling with alcoholism, navigating fame and media success while battling depression and suicidal thoughts privately, and the long journey toward healing, accountability, and self-awareness.

Annitah also reflects on the difficult but powerful process of no longer seeing herself only as a victim of her story, but learning how to confront the ways unresolved trauma shaped her choices, relationships, and sense of self. This episode is an honest conversation about survival, accountability, healing, addiction, self-worth, and choosing yourself.

Connect With Annitah Rae:
https://www.instagram.com/annitahraey/

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Listen to the Legally Clueless podcast: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2HGOzQ4B9A0fcGJjJBgMWW Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/ke/podcast/legally-clueless/id1449048944 Spreaker: https://www.spreaker.com/show/legally-clueless Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/cb0c8f7d-4c82-4f6d-9a5d-3c1f9e2c8c41/legally-clueless

 #LegallyCluelessAfrica #LegallyCluelessPodcast #AfricanStories #MentalHealthAwareness

This week on For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with activist, civic creator and political commentator Tatiana Gicheru for a powerful conversation about courage, womanhood, activism and choosing yourself unapologetically.

Tatiana opens up about:

• Standing up to authority from a young age
• Finding her voice through blogging & storytelling
• Pleasure, shame & reclaiming ownership of women’s bodies
• The 2024 Finance Bill protests & documenting injustice
• Fear, surveillance & continuing to speak up anyway
• Internet backlash, misogyny & online bullying
• Intergenerational sisterhood & learning from older women
• Why women need to stop shrinking themselves

This episode is a reminder that speaking up doesn’t mean you’re fearless,
it means you choose your values anyway.

Connect With Tatiana: https://www.instagram.com/tatianagicheru/

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This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle unpacks emotional abuse in romantic relationships what it is, how it manifests, why it’s often difficult to identify, and the long-term impact it can have on your nervous system, self-worth and sense of reality. Many people only recognize abuse when it becomes physical. But emotional abuse can be quieter, subtler and deeply destabilizing. It can look like gaslighting, emotional withdrawal, control disguised as love, walking on eggshells, chronic criticism, emotional unpredictability and constantly second-guessing yourself.

In this episode, Adelle explores:

• What emotional abuse actually is
• The psychology behind gaslighting and trauma bonds
• Why emotionally abusive relationships are difficult to leave
• How emotional abuse impacts your nervous system
• Signs a relationship may be emotionally unsafe
• Rebuilding self-trust after emotional harm

The episode also references insights from therapists and trauma experts including Dr. Ramani Durvasula, Dr. Gabor Maté, Nedra Glover Tawwab and Lundy Bancroft.

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In this episode of the Legally Clueless podcast, media personality, mental health advocate and GBV activist Annitah Rae shares the first part of her deeply personal story. She opens up about growing up feeling deeply loved by her father but struggling through a painful relationship with her mother, becoming rebellious as a teenager, substance use, running away from home, surviving life on the streets at 14, and the traumatic sexual assault that changed her life forever.

This episode is an honest conversation about pain, survival, trauma, mental health, and the ways unresolved childhood wounds can shape a young person’s life.

Connect With Annitah Rae:
https://www.instagram.com/annitahraey/

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Listen to the Legally Clueless podcast: Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2HGOzQ4B9A0fcGJjJBgMWW Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/ke/podcast/legally-clueless/id1449048944 Spreaker: https://www.spreaker.com/show/legally-clueless Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/cb0c8f7d-4c82-4f6d-9a5d-3c1f9e2c8c41/legally-clueless

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This week on For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with lawyer and entrepreneur Bev Munga, founder of Gspot Kenya and popularly known as “The Vibrating Lawyer.” In this bold and honest conversation, Bev opens up about:

• Building one of Kenya’s most talked-about pleasure brands
• The backlash she faced for centering women’s pleasure
• Choosing a child-free life
• Solo travel as self-care
• Fulfillment outside motherhood
• Freedom, autonomy, and redefining womanhood on her own terms

Connect with Bev Munga:
https://www.instagram.com/theevibratinglawyer

Follow Gspot Kenya:
https://www.instagram.com/gspotkenya_

Join Bev's Childfree Community:
We've had to pull down the link as the group has reached capacity.
Follow Bev on instagram for more information.

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This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle unpacks the emotional discomfort that can come with finally standing up for yourself after years of people pleasing, weak boundaries, over-giving and self-abandonment. From romantic relationships to friendships, this episode explores what happens when you stop shrinking yourself to keep other people comfortable. Why does setting boundaries feel guilty?
Why does speaking up sometimes feel physically uncomfortable?
Why do some relationships become strained when you finally choose yourself?

Adelle reflects on a recent personal trigger and unpacks the realization that changed everything:
“The discomfort wasn’t coming from doing something wrong. The discomfort came from doing something different.”

This episode dives into:

• People pleasing and the “fawn response”
• Why boundaries can trigger anxiety
• Romantic relationships built on self-sacrifice
• Friendship dynamics and emotional labor
• Why healing can make others uncomfortable
• The grief of outgrowing unhealthy dynamics
• Learning to tolerate the discomfort of self-respect

If you’ve ever:

• struggled to say no,
• replayed conversations after asserting yourself,
• felt guilty for having needs,
• feared disappointing people,
• or confused self-sacrifice with love,

this episode is for you.

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