Lessons from a Quitter

We're all overwhelmed. All the time.

And we think it's just the way it is.

"There is just too much to do."

That's a lie.

For the past year, I've delved into how to overcome my own overwhelm...in building a business, in raising my kids, in surviving a pandemic.

And it's been the most eye-opening experience.

This week I want to talk to you about guilt. As we're heading into the holiday season, I'm sure that we're all feeling obligated to do certain things. And I just want to offer that you don't have to do anything. So today I want to talk to you about where that guilt comes from and how to reframe those thoughts so you're not saying yes out of obligation but rather choosing what you want to do intentionally.

This week's episode is a replay of Episode 115: Life Is Both Good And Bad.

On this week's episode, we talk about the duality of life, the good and the bad. Life is always going to throw curveballs at us and we need to deconstruct the idea that we need to be happy all the time. Owning our dissatisfaction and working toward goals that allow for small wins will help us be more fulfilled.

This week, we're talking about mini-experiments. So many people come to me because they have no idea what they want to do. They either stay stuck forever or decide to go all-in on the next thing that they pick. Both can be a disaster. I'm going to teach you how to start test driving a new job, hobby, or industry, before you jump in.

On this week's episode, I'm sharing the lessons I learned from my photo booth business. While I knew this business wasn't what I was passionate about, I'm so grateful to my past self for starting it because I learned so much and it eventually led me to exactly what lights me up.

"Do you regret going to law school?" I get this all the time.

Why would I waste a single second regretting something I can't change?

No matter how much I replay it, beat myself up, blame other people, think about how much better my life would be if I didn't go...

It won't change the fact that I went to law school.

So instead of wasting my time on something I can't change, I focus on what I want to do with my life from here on out.

That doesn't mean that I can't learn from my past decisions.

I look back and evaluate why I choose to go:

➤ where was I abandoning myself for other people's approval?

➤ where was I seeking validation instead of listening to my gut?

➤ where was I simply doing what I was told instead of questioning it?

I do all of that so that I can make better decisions in the future.

But that doesn't mean I ever spend the time regretting my decision.

Because it is done.

And I had my reasons (even if I wouldn't choose those reasons now).

And I can have self-compassion for the old me who didn't know any better.

And I gain nothing by torturing myself with regret.

Because regret comes from a thought.

The thought: "If I hadn't made that decision, my life would be so much better."

And that's a lie.

I have no idea how my life would have turned out.

So I choose not to think that thought.

And you can choose the same thing.

Because regret is a choice.

I'm so excited to have my student, Christina, on the podcast this week! I want you to understand the huge impact learning how to manage your mind has on every part of your life. Christina's story is the perfect example! Since taking my 6 month program, she has gone from being scared to talk in front of other people to signing up for an improv class, having no idea what else she wanted to do to enrolling in a 10-week real estate rookie boot camp, and having no idea how to manage her emotions to helping coach those around her. But the most amazing part of her journey is she was able to completely stop taking her anxiety medication. Her anxiety was such a crippling part of her life that she missed out on annual girls trips for years. Not anymore! She went on this year's trip and they're already planning the next one. She really is the poster child for how managing your mind can create a ripple effect in your life. Make sure to listen to the episode to see how she shifted her mindset to start getting massive results in her life.

This week I want to talk to you about being delusional. And my little secret is that we're all delusional, we just don't call it that. We have fancy terms like imposter syndrome, which is feeling like a fraud despite all the evidence to the contrary. It's ignoring everything you've achieved to instead believe that you have no idea what you're doing. It's quite literally being delusional. The truth is that we're fine with being delusional as long as it is with negative thoughts. When it comes to positive thoughts -- thinking we can achieve our goals, believing the best about ourselves-- then we draw the line. So today I want to talk to you about why you should delusional in the biggest, most expansive way.

This week I talk to you about a hard truth: if you're telling yourself you don't know what you want to do, it's just a lie your brain is telling you. You do know, you're just scared. Being stuck in I don't know is safe while actually trying something is terrifying. But if you're ready to start taking action and get past the I don't know, I have five tips to help you start uncovering what lights you up.

This week I have my friend, Bevin Farrand, on the show. I've been waiting awhile to have her join because her story is so powerful. In 2019 after being laid off for the third time in her career, Bevin thought enough of putting my financial health in the hands of someone else. In addition to her full-time job, she had been coaching on the side so she decided to give it a go full-time. A few months later, Bevin experienced a totally unexpected tragedy when her husband suddenly passed away in his sleep. They had just come back from a 5-day whirlwind, once-in-a-lifetime, totally "unreasonable" trip to France to reconnect. Her husband's untimely passing made her realize that we don't have the luxury of waiting to do those crazy, important things in our lives. It pushed her to launch Take the Damn Trip to help other people go after the biggest life possible.

Bevin is definitely a force of nature but using her DAMN Framework has allowed her and her clients to start businesses, grow businesses and overcome loss.

In this episode, we talk about:

• starting with your yes and your why
• being present in the moments, not the minutes
• taking the damn trip
• and so much more

Find Bevin here: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/takethedamntrip/ Website: https://takethedamntrip.com/