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Your narcissist thrives on gaslighting you. That leads you to look "crazy" or paranoid, both to yourself and others. Because narcissists are so good at wearing their masks, it takes time to figure out what you're dealing with, and then takes time and strategy to show others what's really happening. Our legal and family court systems are not equipped to identify or handle extreme narcissists. Finally, there are 8 types of post separation abuse (from Tina Swithin). I encourage you to learn more about them so you can protect yourself, or support someone going through it!
KEY TAKEAWAYS
BEST MOMENTS
A narcissist's main aim in life is to take as much as they can, whilst giving away as little as possible. – narcissisms.com
Narcissists provoke you until you eventually react, then blame you for your reaction.
–narcissisms.com
Take a step back and pay attention to what your narcissist is accusing you of, that's the closest thing to a confession you'll ever get from them. –Hayley Runnels
When a narcissist has lost control over you, they try to control how others see you.
–Jill Blaekway
Never defend yourself to a narcissist. They already know you're right! They just want you to go crazy trying to prove it. –backbonepower.com
The Best Way to Win With a Narcissist Is Not to Play. –unknown
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
In this episode we have the privilege of chatting with Kristy Orenstein. Kristy has a lot of lived-experience, has so much wisdom to share and we are going to hear some amazing tips for how to move through obstacles and challenges to build the life that you desire. We are so lucky to have her with us today! Thank you Kristy!
KEY TAKEAWAYS
BEST MOMENTS
Only in the darkness can you see the stars ― Martin Luther King, Jr.
Hope is the only thing stronger than fear. ― Unknown
Once you choose hope, anything's possible. ― Christopher Reeve
Show gratitude. Gratitude is a simple but powerful thing. –Randy Pausch
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
There is a difference between our emotions and feelings. The six fundamental emotions are happiness, sadness, fear, disgust, anger, and surprise. Our emotions are like the engine of the car, so it's really important that we keep our emotional engine tuned and healthy. When we aren't aware of our emotions it can cause serious issues in our lives.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
BEST MOMENTS
Emotions are energy. Energy wants to move. When stuck emotions cause stress, it's the energy asking you to help it move. –Unknown
True emotional healing doesn't happen without feeling. The only way out is through. Jessica Moore
We cannot selectively numb emotions, when we numb the painful emotions, we also numb the positive emotions. –Brene Brown
I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions. I want to use them, to enjoy them, and to dominate them. –Oscar Wilde
The idea that you have to be protected from any kind of uncomfortable emotion is what I absolutely do not subscribe to. –John Cleese
Your emotions make you human. Even the unpleasant ones have a purpose. Don't lock them away. If you ignore them, they just get louder and angrier. –Sabaa Tahir
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman
Is it a Feeling or is it an Emotion?
Link: https://karlamclaren.com/is-it-a-feeling-or-is-it-an-emotion-revisited/
Link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-pleasure-is-all-yours/202202/the-important-difference-between-emotions-and-feelings
Link: https://www.happierhuman.com/emotions-vs-feelings/
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
"What you look for you find' -Oprah. Gratitude is a vital component to our mindset and health. Gratitude gives us a choice. When we choose to focus on the presence of what is working in our lives – and put language and meaning to it – we are able to more seamlessly lean in to gratitude and see the overwhelming benefits occur.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
Here are just a few of the benefits of gratitude:
BEST MOMENTS
Acknowledging the good that you already have in your life is the foundation for all abundance –Eckhart Tolle
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. –Melodie Beattie
It is not joy that makes us grateful; it is gratitude that makes us joyful –David Steindl-Rast
At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us. –Albert Schweitzer
The real gift of gratitude is that the more grateful you are, the more present you become –Robert Holden
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
Psychology Today Link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/what-mentally-strong-people-dont-do/201504/7-scientifically-proven-benefits-of-gratitude
Positive Psychology Link: https://positivepsychology.com/benefits-gratitude-research-questions/
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
Narcissist relationships aren't just with our significant other, spouse, partner, etc. They can happen with any kind of relationship. And once we've attracted a narcissist once, particularly if it's been a significant relationship, unfortunately, we will continue that pattern, until we know the signs and then act on them! This episode helps you identify how you feel when you are in a relationship with a narcissist, so you can learn to identify those signs early and decide what actions you need to take given the specific situation you are in.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
5 ways to identify you have a narcissist in your life
BEST MOMENTS
When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but you stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth just like you did." ― Jill Blakeway
You will never really see how toxic someone is until you breathe fresher air." — Unknown
A narcissist paints a picture of themselves as being the victim or innocent in all aspects. They will be offended by the truth. But what is done in the dark will come to light. Time has a way of showing people's true colors." — Karla Grimes
There is simply no winning with a narcissist. He will treat you so horribly that you will become withdrawn and depressed and then he will turn around and say, 'You're no fun anymore, you're always so depressed. I need to be with someone more positive.'" — Susan Williams
You might as well bang your head into a brick wall if you expect the narcissist to be reasonable, empathetic or human in any way. If you sense or witness any of these traits, there is an ulterior motive. When the narcissist is being nice, it's because they have something to gain." — Tina Swithin
Relationship with a narcissist in a nutshell: You will go from being the perfect love of their life, to nothing you do is ever good enough. You will give your everything and they will take it all and give you less and less in return. You will end up depleted, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and probably financially, and then get blamed for it." — Bree Bonchay
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
Welcome to Season 2! Mindset is everything! We will come back to that again and again and again! No matter whether you are trying to accomplish a goal, reach a lifelong dream, or move through specific obstacles, your mindset is vital. And, the great news is that you always have a choice! I'm so looking forward to our journey this season. Thank you for being here!
KEY TAKEAWAYS
BEST MOMENTS
We will only understand the miracle of life fully when we allow the unexpected to happen. --Paulo Coelho
Ways of life change only in living. --Wendell Berry
The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. --Eleanor Roosevelt
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. --Margaret Mead
These three things lead to positive non-linear results: clarity, focus, and time. Simple but not easy. --Shane Parrish
You change your life by changing your heart. --Max Lucado
Follow your bliss and don't be afraid, and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be. --Joseph Campbell
You can't use an old map to explore a new world. --Albert Einstein
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
We are recapping the best of Season 1! We looked back at all of the amazing information and tips and tricks from Season 1. There was so much learning and growth this Season – as much for me as anyone. It's been a pleasure and I'm thrilled that you joined me on this journey so far. Thank you and see you in Season 2!
KEY TAKEAWAYS
BEST MOMENTS
We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies. — Roderick Thorp
Everything you've ever wanted is on the other side of fear. –George Addair
Always ask yourself if what you're doing today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow. –Paulo Coelho
You become what you think about most of the time ... so think about what you want to accomplish. – Earl Nightingale
Courage is what it takes to stand up and speak; courage is also what it takes to sit down and listen. –Winston Churchill
Every time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing. –Theodore Roosevelt
The capacity for hope is the most significant fact of life. It provides human beings with a sense of destination, and the energy to get started. –Norman Cousins
Hope is not blind optimism. It's not ignoring the enormity of the tasks ahead or the roadblocks that stand in our path…Hope is that thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us if we have the courage to reach for it and to work for it and to fight for it.
― Barack Obama
Once you choose hope, anything's possible. ― Christopher Reeve
I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear. –Nelson Mandela
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
Everyone around you is grieving, go easy:
https://johnpavlovitz.com/2019/02/21/everyone-around-you-is-grieving-go-easy/
Hope Rising, How the Science of Hope Can Change Your Life, by Casey Gwinn, J.D. and Chan Helllman, PhD.
Arya Harris Keller – www.thisgoddesslife.com
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
In this episode, we are going to talk about narcissism and narcissists. It's important to talk about because as you can see with many of the quotes above, we often don't realize we are in a relationship with a narcissist. And certainly, more often, others don't realize we are in a relationship with a narcissist. Now, this can be any kind of relationship - friendship, co-worker, parent, or intimate partner. In my experience, they are all difficult for different reasons, however the more intimate the relationship, the more damaging it ends up being. And, more importantly, the harder it gets to extricate yourself from the relationship. The process can take much longer, and needs way more strategy than you think it will.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
It's really important to understand that narcissism happens on a spectrum. And we all fall on that spectrum somewhere. A little narcissism can be healthy. What we are talking about here, though, is pathological narcissism that's happening at the extreme end of the spectrum.
BEST MOMENTS
There is simply no winning with a narcissist. He will treat you so horribly that you will become withdrawn and depressed and then he will turn around and say, You're no fun anymore, you're always so depressed. I need to be with someone more positive. –Susan Williams, writer
The best way to upset a narcissist is by ignoring him. –J.B. Snow, writer
Narcissists are all about image. They create a false self for the external world to see – which often comes across as charming, moralistic, kind, considerate, and "perfect". Meanwhile, behind closed doors they are the world's biggest hypocrites. They will pathologically lie, cheat, verbally assault, and completely destroy their family with zero remorse. What you see, is NOT what you get behind closed doors. –healing.after.a.narcissist
Nobody gets more upset than a narcissist who is accused of something they absolutely did. –notsalmon.com
When a toxic person can no longer control you, they will try to control how others see you. The misinformation will feel unfair, but stay above it, trusting that other people will eventually see the truth just like you did. –Jill Blakeway
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
Dr. Craig Malkin
https://www.drcraigmalkin.com/#home
Cycle of Narcissistic Abuse (Gaum and Herring)
https://www.tanyagaum.com/cycleofnarcissisticabuse
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
This is our second episode about fear and those little gremlin voices we all have in our heads. In episode #16 we talked about the first two fear gremlins: fear of dreaming and fear of failure. In this episode, we'll talk about the other two fear gremlins, the fear of upsetting people and conflict identification, which translates into thinking "I don't matter" or "I'm not enough".
Remember, we all have those nagging little voices in our heads that tell us what we can't do, what we shouldn't do, and in the case of fear of upsetting people, what we have to do to keep others happy. Those are our little gremlins. And they often keep us from doing exactly what we want in life. In this episode, we'll talk more about them and how to quiet their, sometimes incessant, noise.
KEY TAKEAWAYS
BEST MOMENTS
I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear. –Nelson Mandela
Your life does not get better by chance; it gets better by change. –Jim Rohn
Perhaps the most radical act of resistance in the face of adversity is to live joyfully. –Ari Honorvar
We learn to do by doing. –Denzel Washington
VALUABLE RESOURCES
If you're struggling in a relationship and wondering if it might be controlling, you're not alone. Download my free guide at locatecoaching.com/freegift to help you find clarity and confidence.
Jay Shetty videos:
https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=206569690241837
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6pE6gz39KI
EPISODES TO CHECK OUT NEXT
Check out other episodes of Life After: From Surviving to Thriving:
https://sites.libsyn.com/460833/site
ABOUT THE HOST
Jill McKnight is a mindset coach and speaker as well as an Erickson Professional Certified Coach. She specializes in supporting those who are rebuilding their lives and finding their most aligned path forward.
Jill knows that the tips and tricks in each episode work – because she's used them to change her life and her clients have used them to change their lives! Jill has the education and life experience to help you rebuild your life, whatever the circumstances… and move from surviving to thriving!
Through her talks, events, programs, and podcast "Life After: From Surviving to Thriving", Jill provides her clients with a unique mix of thoughtful guidance and sincere care. She lives in a small town in Washington with her son and is committed to co-create a world with more hope, connection, and healing for us all.
CONNECT & CONTACT
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@locatecoaching
IG: https://www.instagram.com/locatecoaching/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCwEImRGJXX4hrdS_NM3wWXg
Email: [email protected]
It was my great pleasure to interview my dear friend, Arya Harris Keller. Arya is the Founder of This Goddess Life LLC. Here's a little bit about Arya:
I have a BA (Hon) from the University of Toronto. I considered a career in academia but chose to become an adoptive mom to two children instead. My son has Written Output and Generalized Anxiety Disorders and my daughter has Reactive Attachment Disorder. Like most Special Parents, I have dedicated significant time – years – to researching and understanding my kids' issues, making me an unofficial expert of sorts. I also have a lifelong interest in spirituality and personal development. After a kundalini awakening experience, I found some amazing and profound teachers, who set me on the path of yoga, Enlightenment Intensives and Mind Clearing. I love how Mind Clearing has a foundation in deep spiritual truth, but it remains secular, practical, and relevant to everyday life. I originally studied Mind Clearing to be a better mom, but I found my passion in this transformational work. For the last 10 years I have been giving and receiving sessions regularly while raising my family. I believe that behind every good Clearer is a good Clearer. I walk my talk. It is my sacred honor to offer Mind Clearing to others and to support them on their journey.
Please reach out to Arya for her free gift or for more details about the work she's doing with Special Moms and Dads at [email protected]
You can also find Arya on FB at Arya Jennifer Harris Keller - https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.harris.9216778
From the publisher's feed