Lit AF Relationships podcast is your resource for creating healthy relationships full of love, trust, safety, and respect. 

Ever been on the receiving end of a sudden outburst from your anxious preoccupied partner? Or maybe you are the one who panics and lashes out when you feel someone pulling away?

Here’s the deal: It’s not about anger—it’s about fear.

When someone with an anxious preoccupied attachment feels rejected or senses abandonment, their nervous system goes into panic mode. The thought of losing connection feels like life or death, and in that desperation, they might use harsh language, lash out, say things they don’t mean, or even reject someone’s bid for attention before they can be rejected first.

The work is about rewiring their fear of abandonment and expanding their emotional tolerance for discomfort—without self-sabotaging.

Let’s break it all down in this episode. Tune in.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

I used to think that once I became securely attached, life would be smooth sailing—no triggers, no fights, just endless happiness. Turns out… that’s not how this works.

Every client I work with wants to fix their attachment style—stop being clingy, stop avoiding, stop fearing. But here’s the twist: the secret to secure attachment isn’t about changing your patterns. In fact, trying to force change can backfire.

Tune in to here the answer to creating secure attachment.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Is it intuition or just your attachment wounds talking? In this episode, we’re diving into the messy, confusing, and totally relatable struggle of trusting yourself while breaking free from old relationship patterns. From dating dilemmas to parenting choices, cultural expectations to family judgment—it's hard AF to do what feels right when everyone else has an opinion. Whether you’re running, clinging, or struggling with trust (hello, FA), this episode will help you tune into your intuition and stop letting attachment wounds call the shots.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Do you feel like you’re carrying emotions that aren’t even yours? That’s codependency in action! Growing up, we were taught to take on other people’s feelings—sometimes with real consequences if we didn’t. It’s a classic insecure attachment trait, but here’s the good news: You don’t have to keep doing it. In this episode I explore how this trait shows up and how to start letting it go. Imagine how much lighter (and freer!) you’d feel if you let go of emotions that were never yours to hold. Let’s get into it!

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Embarrassment? Nope, never heard of it. At least, that’s what the dismissive avoidant would love you to believe. But deep down (like way deep down), they have a huge fear of being shamed or criticized. As natural perfectionists, they’re laser-focused on how others see them—because if they just get everything right, then everything will be fine... right?

In this episode, we’re talking about why embarrassment is particularly cringe for the dismissive avoidant, why ignoring emotions doesn’t actually make them disappear (sorry!), and how embracing the uncomfortable can lead to healthy connection. Trust me, you don’t want to miss it!

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Ever feel like feedback is just code for "you're not enough"? You're not alone. If you have an insecure attachment style, receiving feedback can feel like punishment—like proof that you're failing, falling out of favor, or just not doing it right. We get defensive, take it personally, and totally miss the growth, care, and connection that feedback is meant to bring.

In this episode, I’m sharing my own journey with feedback (yes, even in my marriage!) and how shifting your mindset can turn feedback from a threat into a gift. Tune in to learn how to stop taking it so personally and start using it to thrive—at work, in relationships, and beyond.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

If you thought becoming securely attached meant pretending you have no needs (looking at you, Anxious Preoccupied), never asking for space again (hello, Avoidant), or blindly trusting someone overnight (nice try, Fearful Avoidant), then… we need to talk.

In this episode, I break down the biggest misconceptions insecurely attached folks have about “doing the work” and why forcing yourself to abandon your old patterns isn’t the answer. Spoiler: You don’t have to become a totally different person to be secure—you just need better communication tools. Let’s get into it! 🚀

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Dating can be tricky for anyone, but when you have an insecure attachment style, it can feel like a rollercoaster. Whether you’re anxiously chasing connection, avoiding commitment, or stuck in the push-pull of a fearful avoidant cycle, dating often brings out old patterns that just aren’t working.

In this episode, we’re diving into:

Anxious daters – Why they ignore red flags, say yes when they mean no, and prioritize being in a relationship over the actual person.

Avoidant daters – Why they tend to avoid dating, take forever to commit, and struggle with knowing what they really want.

Fearful avoidants – How they crave connection but also fear it, leading to trust issues and a lot of internal conflict.

The anxious-avoidant cycle – Why these patterns keep repeating and how to break free.

If dating has ever felt frustrating, confusing, or downright exhausting, this episode is for you. Tune in to learn how to ditch the insecurity and date with more confidence!

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Attachment parenting might sound hard, but honestly, it’s a mix of deep connection, big emotions, and hoping coffee can get us throught the day. This week, we’re diving into the four pillars: setting boundaries (and sometimes being flexible about them), creating space for vulnerability and big feelings (like crying over the wrong color cup—again), modeling how to meet needs (even if it’s just five minutes alone in the bathroom), and embracing patience, because if attachment parenting had a slogan, it’d be, “Breathe through the tantrum, yours and theirs.” 

Join us for laughs, insights, and practical tips on how these pillars can strengthen your parenting game—chaos and all!

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Emotions are the original gateway drug—especially guilt and shame. In this episode, we unpack why my 20-year smoking habit wasn’t about the bad health effects but instead, it was about the delicious, twisted guilt behind it. Inspired by Carolyn Lovewell’s Existential Kink, we ask the big question: Can you actually get off on the reality that you’re bringing into your life? Spoiler: gratitude for your inner gremlin might just be the weirdest (and most effective) self-help hack ever. Tune in for laughs, existential dread, and maybe a kink you didn’t know you had.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Lit AF Relationships podcast is your resource for creating healthy relationships full of love, trust, safety, and respect.