Lit AF Relationships podcast is your resource for creating healthy relationships full of love, trust, safety, and respect. 

If you avoid conflict like it’s the plague, this episode is for you. We’re talking about what it really means to be conflict avoidant, how defensiveness, minimizing, or deflecting can sneak in when you’re scared to show up honestly. This pattern is common for the dismissive avoidant type, especially if conflict or emotions didn’t feel safe growing up.

You’ll learn why conflict sends you on an emotional rollercoaster, how shame and guilt fuel your defensiveness, and what to do instead. I’ll share how to own your emotions, regulate during tough conversations, and come from a place of self-worth so you can turn conflict into connection. When you know your emotions and can express them with confidence, your relationships get stronger, deeper, and more brag-worthy.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Ever wondered why your anxious self keeps falling for that avoidant hottie? Or why you suddenly lose interest once someone actually likes you back? In this week’s episode, I’m diving into all your juicy relationship questions. We’ll break down how to figure out your attachment style, what “earned secure” actually means, and how to stop taking every little thing your partner does (or doesn’t do) so personally.

You’ll learn what to do when your partner gets triggered so you can stay grounded instead of spiraling, how to repair after a fight without shame or blame, and how to rebuild connection when you start feeling distant. By the end, you’ll have a whole new toolkit for staying calm, connected, and confident in love, no matter what your attachment style.

So grab your headphones, a cup of tea (or a bottle of wine), and let’s get real about why we love the way we do.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Ever cracked a joke or shared something with your partner, only to suddenly find yourself in a full-blown fight? 😳 One second you’re laughing, the next it’s accusations, defensiveness, and tension. In this episode, I’ll share a real client example of how quickly things can go sideways what to do instead of trying to control your partner’s reaction. We’ll talk about why defensiveness shuts down connection, why feelings are always valid, and how to speak from a place of emotional honesty. By the end, you’ll have tools to handle tough conversations with confidence, whether it’s with your partner, future partner, or even your kids.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Perfectionism might look like striving for A+++ work, but in relationships it often leads to burnout, resentment, and never feeling enough. In this episode of Lit AF Relationships, I share how perfectionism shows up in love, why it keeps you stuck in people-pleasing, and the surprisingly freeing power of embracing B-minus work. Get ready to laugh, reflect, and learn how to let go of impossible standards so you can build the calm, connected, healthy relationship you actually want.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

What if the only thing standing between you and the life you want is your thoughts? In this episode of Lit AF Relationships, host and relationship coach Sarah Cohan breaks down how our beliefs shape our reality—and why we sometimes have to create new ones before we have any proof they’re true. From clients learning to trust themselves in dating, to shifting family dynamics, to Sarah’s own journey with fitness and food, you’ll hear how powerful it is to rewrite old stories and start “doing the impossible.” Tune in to learn how to change your beliefs so you can build supportive, authentic, and lasting relationships—and a more fulfilling life along the way.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Anger gets a bad rap—but it’s actually one of our most useful emotions. In this episode, I explore why anger shows up, what it’s really protecting us from, and how to uncover the softer feelings hiding underneath. From dishes with my husband to those everyday moments that leave us simmering, we’ll look at how to process the deeper emotions behind anger so it no longer feels scary, but instead becomes a guide to what we truly need.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Saying no can feel impossible when you’re wired with insecure attachment. We twist ourselves into pretzels to avoid it—racking up credit card debt, staying in relationships too long, or going out for “just one more drink” we didn’t even want. But here’s the truth: no isn’t rejection, no is clarity. In this episode, I’ll show you how to shift your relationship with no so you can reclaim your time, your energy, and actually help others make the best decisions too.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

This week I’m diving into a big theme that comes up for people with insecure attachment—taking responsibility for other people’s emotions. If your partner gets upset and you feel like you have to fix it, you’re not alone. But here’s the truth: they didn’t ask you to carry that weight. When we overextend, it leads to burnout, resentment, and even a loss of respect in the relationship.

In this episode, I’ll share how to separate your emotions from your partner’s, build tolerance for their discomfort, and take radical ownership of your own thoughts and beliefs. Because the key to healthier relationships isn’t fixing others—it’s learning to stay grounded in yourself.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Our attachment styles form between ages 7 and 12, when our kid-brains saw the world in black and white: Dad’s not here? He must not love me. Mom didn’t like my crying? Better hide my feelings. Over time, those moments solidify into stories like I’m not enough or Something’s wrong with me, and we carry them into adult relationships, jobs, and opportunities. Suddenly, feedback feels like rejection, a delayed text means someone’s leaving, and every interaction is filtered through old fear. The shift happens when you identify and clean up those outdated beliefs—so you can show up in love, work, and life from a grounded, confident place instead of a childhood script.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform

Life, and love, is 50/50. Half joy and connection, half frustration and discomfort. But when perfectionism creeps into a relationship, we start judging the tough moments as signs something is wrong.

In this episode, I share how my own perfectionist mindset showed up in marriage and why it doubled the work during conflict, repairing the fight and the fear it meant we were broken. You’ll learn how perfectionism often hides a craving for calm (especially for Dismissive Avoidant types) and how to create that peace without demanding perfection.

Discover your attachment style to break free from old relationship patterns. Take the free quiz here: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/6329f75e6dd9410016a64043

Follow Lit AF Relationships on Instagram: @itsmesarahcohan.com

Visit the Lit AF Relationships Website: https://www.sarahcohan.com/

If you’re interested in one-on-one or couples coaching I’d love to help you heal old patterns to create healthy relationships where you feel like you’re on the same team. Get started by applying for a free 60-minute healthy relationships call here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSddL3tie849uvgD1m31l4MAH3AzH0FlWgnsG0gPEBEzeDyPyg/viewform