Living in Response

Episode 054 of Living in Response is another peek into my ever evolving perspectives on planetary activism, upshifting humanity, and Ervin Laszlo’s 10 commandments for a more conscious world.

Sending you so much love and gratitude for being a part of this unedited, real-time, and from the heart documentation of the journey <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AIfully available on Substack

1️⃣ Researcher by NatureI reflect on my innate drive to learn, synthesize, and trace ideas back to their roots. Whether it’s quantum physics, consciousness, or spirituality, I’m constantly connecting dots and allowing my curiosity to lead—and today, I embrace that as my true creative expression.

2️⃣ Why I’m Sharing More on InstagramAfter letting my podcast carry the weight of my voice, I’ve decided to start posting daily on Instagram. It’s a new challenge—especially with the 3-minute limit—but I’m experimenting with documenting the process instead of teaching, trusting that clarity comes from sharing.

3️⃣ Lineage, Lineage, LineageI talk about my growing preference for learning from wisdom traditions with a clear lineage. It’s not that other teachings are less valuable—but for me, I’m finding deep safety and clarity in knowing where things come from and how they’ve been passed down.

4️⃣ Stop Reinventing the WheelFor years I believed I had to be entirely “original” to be worthy of sharing—but I’m now honoring that sharing other people’s ideas (with credit) is valuable. Especially when those people have spent decades immersed in the work, and I’m deeply moved by their perspectives.

5️⃣ We’re Already EvolvingI reflect on how I once avoided thinking about the future—until discovering the work of Ervin Laszlo and the Upshift Summit. Now I see we’re not just spiraling—we’re in a transformation. One we can midwife into coherence.

6️⃣ The Summit That Changed MeThe Upshift Summit was the catalyst. For the first time, I heard leaders across science, spirit, and systems theory saying the same thing: we’re in a bifurcation point, and we can evolve upward—if we choose to. That choice begins with remembering who we are.

7️⃣ Project 1GroupLove: Soft LaunchI introduce Project 1GroupLove again, from a new angle. It’s a space for coherence-based gatherings, rooted in science and spirit. The first step? Online events that even my family can attend—a big deal, since I’ve never included them in my spiritual world before.

8️⃣ Heart Coherence = Inner & Outer ChangeI go deep on HeartMath: how heart-brain-emotion harmony is measurable, contagious, and world-shifting. Project 1GroupLove is about creating these felt experiences together—because when we change our internal field, the global field changes too.

9️⃣ We Don’t Need EveryoneI explore the science (and wisdom) behind the idea of critical mass. Change doesn’t require the whole world—just enough of us. Like moving grains of sand on a scale until it tips.

🔟 Hope as a PracticeHope isn’t passive. It’s a practice. Especially when the outer world looks grim. I share how I balance acknowledging hard truths (like climate crisis or inequality) with finding, sharing, and amplifying good news—as a nervous system support and a world-building act.

1️⃣1️⃣ Why I’m Not a Traditional ActivistI talk about how I’ve never resonated with protest-style activism (at the same time seeing it’s importance!) —but I do resonate with coherence, community, storytelling, and nervous-system-safe awareness sharing. That’s my activism. That’s how I serve.

1️⃣2️⃣ The Crisis Is Real—But So Is the OpportunityI reflect on how many people avoid thinking about the future because it feels hopeless. But the convergence of science, wisdom, and conscious community is telling a different story: this is the time. We are not too late.

1️⃣3️⃣ Should I Start a Book Club?I wonder aloud if part of my role is to help digest these brilliant, complex books for people who don’t have time (or capacity) to read them. Should I read passages aloud? Summarize and reflect? I muse about formats and accessibility—and ask for your thoughts.

1️⃣4️⃣ The Ten Commandments for a Conscious FutureI read Ervin Laszlo’s “Ten Commandments for Thriving in a World of Diversity” and reflect on what it stirs in me—especially the idea that helping those less privileged isn’t just nice, it’s necessary for evolution.

1️⃣5️⃣ Wealth, Scarcity & My Shift in PerspectiveI talk honestly about how my relationship with money has changed. I used to want to be rich so I could help others later. Now I see how that mindset was rooted in scarcity. What if we helped now? What if sustainability—not accumulation—was the measure of success?

1️⃣6️⃣ Why Millennials (Like Me) Need to Hear ThisI share how much of this planetary evolution conversation is dominated by older generations—and why I feel a calling to bring these teachings to my peers. Millennials are hungry for hope, purpose, and collective care. I want to help bridge that.

🌀 The Bottom Line:You don’t have to have it all figured out.You don’t have to be an “original thinker.”You just have to care enough to start.Feed the field. Follow the resonance.Remember what matters.

Mentions & Inspirations:📗 The Great Upshift – Ervin Laszlo & David Lorimer🌎 HeartMath Institute – Heart coherence and collective field research🧬 Bruce Lipton – Conscious biology and human potential👣 Xochitl Ashe – Indigenous tools for the new era📖 Jude Currivan – Cosmology and the science of unity📜 The Ten Commandments for Thriving in a World of Diversity – Ervin Laszlo🌀 Project 1GroupLove – A coherence-based collective now live on Instagram📚 Book club, maybe? (Still mulling that one.)

❤️ Core Message:You’re allowed to start from wonder.You’re allowed to document before you teach.You’re allowed to speak before it’s perfect.This is what evolution feels like.And you’re not alone in it.

Sending love and prayers to all my relations <3

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 053 of Living in Response is raw in the truest sense of the word. I recorded this yesterday after several failed attempts and almost didn’t post it but I decided that redoing it today to “make it better” isn’t the Living in Response way. It is what it is and perhaps now the next time I record now I’ll remember to check the mic :)

Thanks for supporting this unedited, real-time, ever evolving project in sharing my thoughts, ideas, and explorations.

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ Three Failed Attempts, One Honest StartI share how this episode almost didn’t happen after two failed recording attempts—one lost to Instagram, the other ruined by bad audio. In true Living in Response fashion, I start again, raw and real, with no expectations.

2️⃣ Project 1GroupLove Is BornI introduce Project 1GroupLove, the coherence-based collective I’ve launched after watching Ervin Laszlo’s Upshift Summit. I reflect on how it sparked a deep recognition of purpose—something I’ve been praying for—and how I’m learning to let it grow slowly, intuitively, and imperfectly.

3️⃣ Gate 28, Purpose & The Ache to ServeAs someone with Gate 28 in Human Design (essentially the gate of purpose/finding meaning in life), I talk about the long search for something worthy to devote myself to. After reaching a breaking point with overconsumption of self-help, I turned inward—and found clarity.

4️⃣ A Call to CoherenceI explain the concept of coherence as taught by HeartMath and why it’s central to both my spiritual path and Project 1GroupLove. Coherence isn’t abstract—it’s a measurable, embodied state that brings our hearts, minds, and emotions into harmony. And it’s contagious.

5️⃣ From Chaos to ComplexityWe’re not devolving—we’re upshifting. I explore how evolution happens through breakdown and how even in today’s disintegration, something new is forming. Like the butterfly from the caterpillar, we’re dissolving to reimagine the whole.

6️⃣ Hopeful Monsters & Gaian FuturismI embrace the term hopeful monster—those of us wired for a different world—and name myself a Gaian futurist, someone who sees and shapes the future from love and interconnection with the Earth. You might be one too.

7️⃣ From Science to Spirit to Shared RealityI reflect on how coherence science and indigenous prophecy are saying the same thing: we’re in a transition. And the work is both practical and spiritual. Evolution requires both physiology and faith.

8️⃣ The Fuji Declaration & A Global InvitationI share the Fuji Declaration—a global call to awaken human potential—and reflect on its beautiful alignment with everything I’ve been feeling. I won’t make the live event, but it’s deeply shaped the energy of this project.

9️⃣ Why We Don’t Need Everyone to ChangeI unpack the idea of critical mass—that we don’t need everyone to shift, just enough of us. Using the metaphor of a scale and grains of sand, I reflect on how collective tipping points work, and why every act of love matters.

🔟 Trusting Myself is the PracticeEven after receiving what felt like a divine answer to my purpose prayers, I still found myself doubting. I talk about learning to trust that I do know—that clarity can come not from more mentors or certifications but from tuning into my own coherent heart.

1️⃣1️⃣ Small Starts, Real ShiftsFrom picking a profile picture to writing a mission statement, I reflect on how Project 1GroupLove came to life by slowing down, breathing into coherence, and asking myself, “What do I already know?” The answers were there.

1️⃣2️⃣ Tools for a New EraI share a few powerful teachings from Xochitl Ashe’s workshop, which offered four tools for navigating this transition: agility (not just resilience), vision, certainty, and community. These are the skills of the future.

1️⃣3️⃣ Why This Feels Like PurposeThe convergence of science, spirit, and service has landed in my heart as something I can genuinely give my life to—at least for now. It doesn’t feel forced. It feels like a seed I’ve been watering for years, finally sprouting.

1️⃣4️⃣ Living in Response: The Practice ContinuesI wrap by reflecting on how this podcast continues to be a place for processing in real-time. And how even when I don’t know what to say, or where things are going, just sitting down and starting is enough.

🌀 The Bottom Line:Purpose doesn’t always come with clarity—it often comes with curiosity. We don’t need to wait until we have it all figured out. We just need to trust our hearts, feed the field, and keep listening. A different kind of world is still possible—and you might be one of the ones here to build it.

Mentions & Inspirations:📘 The Survival Imperative – Ervin Laszlo🌍 HeartMath Institute – Coherence science🕊️ The Fuji Declaration – Global call for conscious evolution🔥 Xochitl Ashe – Tools for a New Era🍃 Project 1GroupLove – Now live on Instagram🌀 Gaian Futurism – A new identity rooted in Earth-conscious vision🌱 Hopeful Monsters – Evolutionary edge-dwellers like you

❤️ Core Message:This isn’t about perfection or polish.It’s about presence, coherence, and courage.Start small. Let it be messy.You already know.We already know.Let’s remember—together.

I recently learned that holding a vision for a more unified, coherent, loving Earth is actually a prayer - so here’s to holding that prayer in my heart every day.

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 052 of Living in Response is another one of me finding my footing in the Upshift movement that I’ve high-key decided to devote my life to, nbd.

Thanks for supporting this ever-evolving raw (unedited), real-time, very much a work in progress podcast. In the words of Emma Watson and that really cool perfume commercial, “I am never the same.”

Subscribing shows the love, but no pressure <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ Acupuncture, Cupping & Hashimoto’sI share my first experiences with acupuncture, cupping, and moxibustion as part of a new approach to managing Hashimoto’s symptoms. I reflect on the emotional release I felt, the immediate effects on my nervous system, and how different this felt from anything offered in Western medicine.

2️⃣ Relaxation Without ScreensAfter being told to “truly rest,” I realized I didn’t know how to relax without a screen. I describe what happened when I put down the devices, laid in bed for hours, breathed deeply—and how unexpected emotions surfaced and moved through.

3️⃣ Reading Ervin Laszlo’s The Survival ImperativeI share my reflections on Ervin Laszlo’s book The Survival Imperative, which explores how humanity must consciously evolve in order to survive. I talk about how this text made so many of my studies—quantum physics, systems theory, spirituality—finally click together.

4️⃣ My Research Finally Has a ShapeFor the first time, I feel like my passion for fringe science, interconnection, spiritual evolution, and coherence has taken coherent form. I reflect on past pursuits that didn’t quite fit and how this vision feels both anchored and expansive.

5️⃣ Conscious Evolution & Collective OpportunityI explain the concept of upshifting: that humanity is in a crisis moment—but it’s a portal, not a death sentence. Evolution happens when systems break down. This is our moment to choose coherence and collaboration over chaos and collapse.

6️⃣ From Pseudoscience to PossibilityI reflect on how mainstream science often dismisses consciousness studies as “pseudoscience”—and why that doesn’t deter me. I offer historical context for how revolutionary ideas (like gravity) were once rejected too, and how change always begins at the edges.

7️⃣ Spiritual Materialism & Collective PurposeI name my disillusionment with spiritual spaces that revolve around individual wealth and success. I question whether personal freedom and money accumulation can truly be everyone’s purpose—and wonder aloud about a world where we live more simply so others may simply live.

8️⃣ Remembering Where I’m FromI reflect on growing up in a low-income area and how that roots my desire to build something meaningful and accessible—not just lucrative. I explore what it means to serve the collective while also honoring personal growth and care.

9️⃣ Critical Mass & Hope Through ChaosI explain how systems reach tipping points—how enough coherence and love in the field can influence global change. Chaos, disintegration, and upheaval are signs of evolution in progress, not failure.

🔟 Being the Change (in Small, Mundane Ways)Whether it’s wiping down gym equipment or composting in my apartment building, I reflect on what it means to be the change in my daily life. The future I want to live in includes those actions—even if no one else is watching.

1️⃣1️⃣ On Love, Hate & the Quantum FieldI say something that feels hard to admit: I believe hate—no matter where it comes from—doesn’t solve anything. And that love, even toward those I disagree with, is more healing and more coherent. We’re all one, and how we treat others reflects how we treat ourselves.

1️⃣2️⃣ Systems That Don’t Work & Visions That MightI share my perspective that both sides of the political spectrum are clinging to broken systems. I call for bold new visions—ones that are collaborative, sustainable, and infused with awe, respect, and interconnection.

1️⃣3️⃣ The Field Is Code: Co-Creating RealityI unpack the metaphor of the universe as a video game, with information as the code. We are co-writing this code through how we feel, act, connect, and care. Evolution is happening—with or without us. But we have the power to shape the outcome.

1️⃣4️⃣ Hopeful MonstersI introduce the concept of a “hopeful monster”—someone born into a system but wired for something different. I name myself one, and you might be too.

🌀 The Bottom Line: It Starts with Us, But It’s Not About UsI end with a reminder that the future is being shaped right now. You matter. Your healing matters. Your presence, your joy, your compassion—it all feeds the field. We’re not just individuals—we’re part of something ancient, evolving, and alive.

Mentions & ResourcesNot affiliated, just a fan

📗 The Survival Imperative by Ervin Laszlo – Conscious evolution and humanity’s tipping point🌎 HeartMath Institute – Research on coherence, emotion, and energetic impact🧠 IONS (Institute of Noetic Sciences) – Consciousness and psi research🔬 Biology of Belief by Bruce Lipton – Epigenetics and the power of mindset🚀 Nassim Haramein & International Space Federation – Unified physics and emerging science🔥 BlueSky (social app) – Where I’ve been exploring and connecting with like minds find me @ mysticallybelle

❤️ Core Message:Yes, things are hard.Yes, the world is chaotic.But this is the moment evolution has been preparing for.You don’t have to save the world—just feed the field with your love, awareness, and willingness to change.We’re in this together. And we’re already becoming.

May we all find our way into a future rooted in love and cooperation.

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 051 of Living in Response digs into receiving an answer to my prayers for direction, the things I’ve been afraid to say, and the significance of the global evolution of consciousness.

Thank you for supporting this raw (unedited), real-time (what I’m going through now) vocal documentation of my journey <3

Subscribing shows the love but no pressure especially because I share my stream-of-consciousness frequently :)

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ Resistance to RecordingI begin by naming the resistance I felt toward recording this episode—how I distracted myself with social media and music, and how sitting with the discomfort (instead of bypassing it) allowed me to soften and show up anyway.

2️⃣ Say the Thing You’re Afraid to SayI reflect on a journaling prompt: “What are you afraid to say?” The answers surprised me—simple truths like “we’re all one” and “love is the way.” I explore why these sentiments, though seemingly wholesome, still feel vulnerable to voice.

3️⃣ The Global Upshift SummitI share how watching Ervin Laszlo’s Global Upshift Summit lit me up. After years of skepticism toward summits, this one felt different—like it mirrored the deeper truths I’ve long felt inside but hadn’t heard spoken aloud so boldly.

4️⃣ Energy Activism & Feeding the FieldI reconnect with ideas I’ve shared before: that how we feel and live energetically ripples out into the collective. The summit affirmed my belief that caring for ourselves in coherence is a valid way of contributing to global healing.

5️⃣ My Upbringing and Desire for Real ImpactI reflect on growing up in a working-class, overlooked part of Kansas City and my disillusionment with "one-on-one coaching" as a path. I want to reach communities like the one I came from—with care, not correction—and offer real possibilities.

6️⃣ The Planetary Fork in the RoadI break down a key summit teaching: we’re at a bifurcation point. Our systems are breaking down, and we’re being asked to evolve. Ervin Laszlo's systems theory shows how this moment is both critical and full of potential—if we choose coherence.

7️⃣ Coherence on a Personal and Planetary ScaleI explain how individual heart-brain coherence mirrors the collective evolution we’re being called into. Just as our inner systems find harmony through breath and awareness, so too can humanity shift into a more connected way of being.

8️⃣ Quantum Physics and Indigenous WisdomI explore how science and ancient traditions are converging to say the same thing: we’re all connected. I reflect on how psychedelics and cannabis ceremonies helped me feel this truth—not just think it—and how coherence makes that truth real.

9️⃣ Zooming Out for PerspectiveI discuss the importance of zooming out when life feels chaotic. Whether it’s personal discomfort or global conflict, a broader perspective reveals that we are in a moment of transformation—not destruction. Growth often looks like breakdown.

🔟 Not in the Convincing BusinessI realize I don’t want to persuade anyone of anything. My role is to live and share my truth—and let it land where it lands. Real change doesn’t come through force. It comes through invitation, resonance, and example.

1️⃣1️⃣ Meditation as a LifelineI explain why I believe meditation is one of the most important practices of our time. It’s what helped me recognize I am not my thoughts—and that spaciousness changed everything. I’m exploring what it could look like to teach it one day.

1️⃣2️⃣ Project 1GroupLoveA new vision is forming: Project 1GroupLove. A coherence-based gathering space rooted in the science of oneness, where people can experience the felt sense of connection. It’s still just a seed, but it feels alive and aligned.

1️⃣3️⃣ Love Is the WayI say what I’ve been afraid to say: that I believe love—not hate—is the only sustainable path forward. Even when it’s hard. Even when we disagree. Even when it hurts. Love is the more coherent, healing frequency—and it changes everything.

1️⃣4️⃣ Zooming Out from JudgmentI describe how I’ve softened over time. From a once combative, judgmental, even bratty version of myself, to someone who now chooses compassion, curiosity, and broader perspective. Judgment still arises—but now I zoom out.

🌀 The Bottom Line: This Is Bigger Than MeI end with a breath and a reminder: we are all enough as we are. Each act of compassion, coherence, and presence feeds the collective. My small, imperfect efforts matter. Yours do too. And that’s what makes this time so sacred.

Mentions & Resourcesnot affiliated, just a fan

🎤 Global Upshift Summit – Hosted by Ken Foster and Ervin Laszlo📗 The Science of Oneness (Ervin Laszlo) – Systems theory, evolution, and coherence🌱 HeartMath Institute – Heart-brain coherence and the global energetic field🧘 Tergar Meditation Program – Secular training in open awareness meditation📖 Spiritual Intelligence by Dawson Church – Positive change across generations🌀 Project 1GroupLove – A coherence collective in the making

❤️ Core Message:This is a time of transformation.Your presence matters.The way you breathe, feel, and relate—matters.Love is the most powerful thing you can offer.And your life, just as it is, is already part of the upshift.

It’s taken me a long time to learn how to ask for support from God/life/the/universe/creator/my ancestors and I’m feeling so grateful and blessed for everything that’s come and is coming my way.

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 050 of Living in Response is a dive into oneness and the sense that a collective re-orientation is not only needed but is already in progress.

Thanks for supporting this raw (unedited), real-time (stuff I’m going through/learning about NOW), practice in self-expression. Open to any and all comments, reflections, question, etc. <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ The Global Upshift Summit 2025I share my experience watching the Global Upshift Summit hosted by Ken Foster and Ervin Laszlo—one of my heroes. I explain what an upshift in consciousness means to me and why this summit called me back to listening after years away from summits.

2️⃣ The Power of Devotion Across a LifetimeSeeing speakers in their 80s and 90s—still fully alive, engaged, and hopeful—stirred something deep in me. I reflect on my dream of finding work I love so much that I never want to "retire," but instead keep offering it to the world until my final days.

3️⃣ Facing Humanity’s Trajectory Without CollapsingI describe how the summit names our real ecological and societal crises without spiraling into catastrophe thinking. Instead, it invites a perspective shift: recognizing humanity’s evolution and holding onto the real hope already blooming around the world.

4️⃣ The Science of Spirituality = The Science of OnenessI paraphrase Ken Foster’s beautiful insight: the science of spirituality is the science of oneness. I explore how ancient spiritual teachings and modern physics are converging to show that everything—and everyone—is interconnected.

5️⃣ The Invitation, Not the ObligationI reflect on how true change comes from invitation, not pressure. I share my distaste for "you should" messaging, and how offering information and experience with open hands is far more powerful than telling others what to do.

6️⃣ Feed the FieldI explain how everything we think, feel, and believe feeds the collective energetic field around us—whether consciously or unconsciously. I'm dreaming of one day hosting coherence gatherings under the name "Feed the Field."

7️⃣ My Journey from Judgement to CompassionI share how deeply I’ve changed over the years—from impatient and self-loathing, to more compassionate, forgiving, and accepting toward myself and others. I hold space for the past versions of me without shame.

8️⃣ Forgiveness Work and the FieldI speak about how writing letters of forgiveness (even if unsent) and taking ownership of my part in past conflicts has freed up so much space inside me. What we heal inside ourselves echoes into the collective.

9️⃣ Practicing Open Awareness in Daily LifeThrough mindfulness training, I’m learning to witness my thoughts and habits—without judgment. Whether it's noticing a craving for chocolate or compulsively picking up my phone, awareness itself brings softness and natural change.

🔟 The Power of Self-AcceptanceI share simple but profound examples of how just accepting my behavior (instead of trying to force myself to change) naturally shifted habits like stress-eating and jaw tension. Acceptance is changing me without force.

1️⃣1️⃣ Why Coherence Practices MatterI circle back to the importance of coherence: aligning mind, heart, and body. Practices like HeartMath’s heart coherence aren’t just personal—they ripple outward, feeding the field of humanity with love, care, and connection.

1️⃣2️⃣ Lynn McTaggart’s Research on Peace Across DividesI share a moving story from Lynn McTaggart’s research: how historically feuding groups came together in an experiment and, by the end, called each other brother and sister. True transformation is possible.

🌀 The Bottom Line: Act Local, Feel Global, Think CosmicI end by reflecting on a beautiful quote from Jude Currivan: "Act local, feel global, think cosmic." We are part of something so much bigger—and there is real hope for humanity when we move from separation to connection.

Mentions & Resourcesnot affiliated, just a fan

📘 Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn – Anchoring mindfulness in daily life🎤 The Global Upshift Summit 2025 – A hopeful vision for humanity’s evolution🌎 Spiritual Intelligence by Dawson Church – Evidence of humanity’s rapid progress🌱 HeartMath Institute – Research on heart coherence and the energetic field💡 Lynn McTaggart – Research on group intention and collective healing🔭 Jude Currivan – “Act local, feel global, think cosmic”

❤️ Core Message:Hope is real.Evolution is happening.You’re part of it, simply by living with love, compassion, and awareness.Your small acts ripple outward in ways you can't even imagine.The future is being shaped right now—and you matter.

Sending peace, love, compassion, and hope to my friends, family, and global community <3

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 049 of Living in Response is a self-hug for the discomfort I feel from being in the present in the moment with nowhere to be.

Thanks for being a part of this unedited, unfiltered, and unbounded journey <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ Why I Started This PodcastI share the truth behind how Living in Response began: I was mentally overwhelmed and needed a place to release the constant stream of thoughts in my head. It started as an emotional pressure valve—and I recorded nearly daily, sometimes more than once, just to feel some relief.

2️⃣ From Forcing to FlowingI reflect on the disconnect between what I said I was doing (surrendering, flowing) and what I was actually doing (pushing, strategizing, trying to figure it all out). The illusion of surrender shattered after a breakdown at my desk—head in hands, tears flowing, and no peace inside.

3️⃣ The Turning PointIn the midst of emotional overwhelm, something shifted. I recognized my nervous system wasn’t broken—it was overloaded from years of hyper-productivity. I named the truth: I’m not here to force anymore. I’m softening. And that changes everything.

4️⃣ The Power of Feminine EnergyAfter a friend mentioned I might be softening into my feminine, something clicked. I’ve spent years in hyper-Yang energy—driving, achieving, producing. Now I’m consciously choosing to rebalance through Yin: slowness, rest, receptivity, care, presence.

5️⃣ Presence as a PracticeI describe the impact of mindfulness in daily life: watching water drip in the shower, eating without my phone, sitting in stillness. I explore how presence isn’t just a tool—it’s the medicine I’ve been needing all along.

6️⃣ Releasing Urgency, Again and AgainThe thoughts still come: If I don’t push, it won’t happen. If I slow down, I’ll lose everything. But now, I catch them. I breathe. And I remember that urgency isn’t required for dreams to grow. They root when I rest.

7️⃣ Meditation & Mindfulness TrainingI share my experience beginning more formal meditation study, and how hard it actually is to just be. The mind wants to move. But in witnessing those urges rather than obeying them, I’m finally starting to find peace.

8️⃣ From Doing to BeingI reflect on the beauty of doing familiar things—like going to the gym, eating, spending time with my partner—but from a completely different energy. The shift isn’t in the activity—it’s in the place I’m living from.

9️⃣ I No Longer Feel Like I’m Going to ExplodeThis podcast was once a lifeline for my overloaded mind. But now that I’m slowing down, the urgency to record every day is gone. I don’t feel the need to “relieve” myself through output. And that feels like growth.

🔟 Permission to Go SlowI explore the metaphor of the stair stepper at the gym: how I used to judge others (and myself) for going slower or faster. Now I see it differently. We’re all moving at our own pace. And for me, slow is sacred.

1️⃣1️⃣ Letting My Path Be MineI speak about the realization that no coach, program, or technique can tell me what I’m here to do. My direction arises from within. My only job is to build a relationship with that inner voice—which lives in the present.

1️⃣2️⃣ The Medicine Is HereI describe how the same actions—cooking, bathing, walking—now feel totally different because I’m present. The urgency is dissolving. My thoughts aren’t the enemy. And in the space between them, there’s creativity, curiosity, and life.

🌀 The Bottom Line: This Is ItThis episode is a love letter to now. Not the future. Not the next breakthrough. Just now. The truth is, I’m not healing to arrive—I’m healing to be. And for the first time in a long time, I feel like I can finally breathe.

Mentions & Resourcesnot affiliated, just a fan

📘 Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn – The simple teaching of “this is it”🧘‍♀️ Formal Meditation Practice – Witnessing the urge to act without reacting📱 Mindful Technology Use – Observing compulsive scrolling patterns🌿 Yin Energy – A conscious return to feminine softness and inner stillness🎤 This Podcast – From pressure valve to spacious expression

❤️ Core Message:You don’t have to rush to be worthy.You don’t have to fix yourself to be allowed to rest.You don’t have to know what’s next to be on the path.This moment is enough.You are enough.

Sending love and prayers to the planet and all her inhabitants. May we be happy, healthy, and loved.

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 048 of Living in Response is a direct result of getting real about the parts of me that are at the root of some of my undesirable patterns + loving them anyways.

Thanks for joining this raw, take-it-with-a-grain-of-salt experiment in speaking and sharing parts of myself as a way to meet some unmet childhood needs :) <3 (lol, but rrly)

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ Why I Really Started This PodcastI name what’s been lurking beneath the surface: I started this podcast to be seen. Not in a performative way—but to be witnessed in the places I never was as a child. I speak openly about the deep need to be known, and how that has shaped this public processing journey.

2️⃣ The Call to Shadow WorkI share how I unexpectedly felt drawn to explore shadow work—not from a course or plan, but from within. I asked ChatGPT to help me identify my shadows. What came through was brutal, honest, and deeply validating.

3️⃣ Facing My Shadows, GentlyFrom over-identification with the seeker to the rescuer complex, secret superiority, addiction to becoming, and fear of ordinariness—I explore the parts of me I usually avoid. Not to fix them, but to finally acknowledge them without shame.

4️⃣ Realizing Inner Work Isn’t EverythingI reflect on how I’ve tried to energy-work, breathwork, and meditate my way out of pain—without looking at the deeper beliefs running the show. I admit I’ve bypassed some of the most potent truths in the name of “healing.”

5️⃣ Mindfulness as MedicineAfter a period of spinning out, I started practicing real mindfulness—like actually being present while showering or eating. And something shifted. Mindfulness gave me access to beauty and clarity I had been rushing past.

6️⃣ The Ache for “The Thing”I speak to the longing for one thing to finally work. One course, one practice, one breakthrough that fixes everything. But instead, I realize: there is no one thing. There is only this moment—and my relationship with it.

7️⃣ Unpacking My Relationship with PurposeI explore the tension between surrender and striving. How much of my purpose is wrapped up in urgency, proving, and the dream as identity? What if pausing isn’t giving up—but letting the dream root itself in me?

8️⃣ Hashimoto’s and the Energetics of UrgencyI reflect on how my autoimmune condition is mirroring my life’s emotional landscape: a body in conflict, a voice suppressed, a system exhausted from over-functioning. I begin connecting physical symptoms to spiritual and ancestral patterns.

9️⃣ Ancestral Healing & the ThroatI explore the idea that my Hashimoto’s isn’t just personal—it’s ancestral. Passed-down patterns of silence, overwork, and suppression may be showing up in my thyroid. I share a moving prayer that helped me release urgency and soften into presence.

🔟 Letting the Present Be EnoughAs Taurus season arrives, I embrace my Taurus Rising. I reflect on how my life is syncing more with the natural cycles, and how slowing down doesn’t mean losing momentum—it means finally trusting life enough to be here.

🌀 The Bottom Line: Softness Is StrengthThis episode is about naming the shadows, releasing urgency, and daring to rest. Not to quit, but to return to rhythm. To stop performing healing and start embodying it. You don’t have to prove anything. You’re already enough.

Mentions & Resourcesnot affiliated, just sharing what’s alive for me

📘 Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn – Anchoring presence in daily life💻 ChatGPT – A surprising mirror for shadow exploration🧘‍♀️ Mindfulness – The missing key in all my healing🌱 Shadow Work – Honest, raw, sometimes uncomfortable, always clarifying🩺 Hashimoto’s Disease – A physical reflection of inner conflict and inherited urgency🌿 Yin Yoga, Baths, Video Games – Rest as reclamation🎤 This Podcast – A living document of what it means to be in process

❤️ Core Message ❤️

You’re not too much. You’re not behind. You’re not broken.You’re just tender. And learning how to live without rushing.Let the future be. Let today hold you.Your presence is enough.

Grateful for all parts of this life, even the tricky bits.

Sending love and prayers to all my relations, including our beautiful, sacred, and supporting planet.

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 047 of Living in Response is a deep reflection into how much time I actually spend thinking instead of being.

Thanks for witnessing this raw, WIP, journey into presence, purpose, and life <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ What This Podcast IsI open by naming something I rarely do: this is Living in Response, an unfiltered, unedited podcast about being in process. I share what’s alive as it arises—no polished narrative, just truth in motion.

2️⃣ The Spiritual Overwhelm LoopI name a repeating cycle: dive deep into spiritual teachings → rush through as much as I can hoping to get somewhere → become emotionally overwhelmed → put it all down → get pulled in again. This time, I saw it more clearly—and it felt different.

3️⃣ The Trainwreck in My MindI describe my thoughts like a chaotic train station—20 thought trains crashing, honking, carrying passengers and packages, all at once. The overwhelm became so intense that I ended up crying at my desk.

4️⃣ The Reset ButtonI walk through how I soothed myself back into presence: a bath, grounding food, rest, walking, and just being. These simple acts—done with presence—reset the noise and returned me to my body.

5️⃣ The Loop Returns… FastEven after the clarity, I found myself immediately back in the loop—researching, spending money, justifying purchases. I caught myself this time, but not before adding two new mindfulness trainings to my digital pile.

6️⃣ The Missing Ingredient: MindfulnessI realize that despite all my spiritual practices, I wasn’t actually practicing mindfulness. I was doing inner work—but not being with my life. Not walking, cooking, brushing my cat with presence. That changes now.

7️⃣ Revisiting Jon Kabat-ZinnI return to Wherever You Go, There You Are and realize how little I understood the first time. The book now feels like a balm. I reflect on the difference between meditating to “do” and meditating to be.

8️⃣ From Thinking to BeingI explore how even though I’ve meditated for years, I’ve often been “doing” inside my meditations—coherence, breathwork, energy work. Mindfulness invites me to stop doing and simply be with what’s here.

9️⃣ Slowing Down Changes EverythingI describe the difference between unconscious reaction and conscious response. With mindfulness, I’m starting to pause before I act—before I buy another course, before I rush into “the next thing.”

🔟 Rewriting What Consistency MeansI reflect on my past episodes and how this podcast has been a thread through it all. It’s not about perfection. It’s about showing up. And maybe that’s what consistency really is—returning again, and again, and again.

🌀 The Bottom Line: It’s All Right HereThis episode is about seeing the loop more clearly, letting go of the need to transcend, and choosing mindfulness as a way of life. The future isn’t the answer.

Mentions & Resourcesnot affiliated, just a fan

📘 Wherever You Go, There You Are by Jon Kabat-Zinn – A return to the roots of mindfulness🧘 Mindfulness & Meditation – Present-moment practices, not mental performance💸 Unconscious Spending – A pattern I’m meeting with curiosity, not shame🎤 This Podcast – The path unfolding, one real-time reflection at a time

❤️ Core Message (@ me) ❤️Mindfulness isn’t something you master. It’s something you return to. Again and again. Even when you forget. Especially when you forget. Because noticing is the practice—and being is enough.

Eternally grateful for this journey of awakening (life).

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 046 of Living in Response is me un-retreating after retreating due to overwhelm. It’s also a 2-in-1 type of thing because I recorded a short post from that state of overwhelm and wasn’t going to post it, but then realized the emotional bits I’m not overly proud of deserve a say too.

Thanks for joining the journey - I don’t fully know where I’m going but I’m sharing about the struggles, the triumphs, the lessons learned, and the raw experience of it along the way <3

Topics Covered in This Episode:

Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ The Pattern Comes BackLess than two days after grounding into presence, I caught myself diving into another research spiral. I reflect on how quickly I can go from “surrendering the future” to accidentally sprinting back into it.

2️⃣ The Episode I Didn’t PostI recorded a 25-minute follow-up while in the thick of emotional self-awareness—but chose not to post it. Then I spiraled about whether I was being “authentic” by hiding the messiness (so I included it here as the second half of the episode).

3️⃣ Overthinking & Emotional OverloadI walk through a very real Thursday where I spiraled into tears at my desk, talked myself through the overwhelm, took a bath, used breathwork and cannabis to self-regulate, and finally came back to center.

4️⃣ Meditation as MedicineReturning to the body saved me. Meditation, breath, lavender lotion, salty baths—everything pointed me back to the moment. The lesson? The answer isn’t “out there.” It’s right here.

5️⃣ Craving Support, Asking for HelpFrom leaning on my partner to asking ChatGPT for brutal honesty, I reflect on what it means to stop retreating when overwhelmed and instead let myself be seen, helped, and held.

6️⃣ Reflecting on My Teaching PathAs I contemplate becoming a meditation teacher, I consider what’s still unfinished. I realize I don’t need more credentials to get started—I need to trust the version of me that already knows.

7️⃣ Brutal Honesty, Beautiful InsightI share a powerful reflection from ChatGPT about how over-preparing, self-doubt, and humility sometimes blur together in a way that keeps me small. It’s tender—and true.

8️⃣ Humor Softens the JourneyEven through overwhelm and money stress, I try to keep humor close. I reflect on the power of laughter, even in the middle of a spiritual spiral. Because sometimes, the only choice is laugh… or cry (or both).

9️⃣ Money, Mistakes & AccountabilityI open up about asking my partner for help with finances—not for permission or to share responsibility, but for reflection and accountability. I talk about learning from non-refundable purchases without shame.

🔟 Facing What’s Right in Front of MeI admit that while I’m often looking to the future, many of my lessons are already here—right in my home, in my body, with my cat, in my finances. The path isn’t always a new course; sometimes it’s scooping the litter box.

🌀 The Bottom Line: Come Back to NowThis episode is about catching myself in the act—again—and choosing presence, again. I don’t have to be perfect. I just have to return. This is the work. This is the path. This is the practice.

Mentions & Resources

not affiliated, just sharing what’s alive for me

💖 Be Here Now by Ram Dass – Still anchoring me through all of it🧘 Meditation & Breathwork – My go-to medicine🛁 Epsom Salt Baths – When emotions need a container💬 ChatGPT Reflections – Surprisingly brutal, surprisingly helpful🗣️ Real Talk with My Partner – Accountability over shame🎤 This Podcast – Where the mess gets a mic

❤️ Core Message @ me ❤️Sometimes it’s not about transcending the spiral—it’s about seeing it, naming it, and softening into presence again. You’re not broken for circling back. You’re human. And you’re doing beautifully.

I am surrounded by endless support from all the realms and for that I am truly grateful.

Mystically,

Belle

Episode 045 of Living in Response feels like a gentle shifting into whatever is coming next. Thanks for joining me on the spiritual journey called life <3

Living in Response is unedited, unfiltered, and largely unplanned. It’s more documentation than outcome and will continue to unfold as I do!

Topics Covered in This Episode:Summarized (mostly) with AI

1️⃣ Letting Go of Future OverwhelmI share how I’ve been overcommitting—signing up for programs and certifications from a place of mental pressure, not presence. When I finally surrendered the future and decided to just be here now, something shifted.

2️⃣ Non-Refundable LessonsFor the first time, I signed up for programs I can’t get refunds for—and it’s teaching me something deeper. It’s not just about money. It’s about releasing the pattern of chasing solutions and being okay with what is.

3️⃣ Changing My Mind (Again)I talk about canceling my Yoga Nidra teacher training after realizing I was doing it more from obligation than joy. My desire to serve is evolving—and I’m learning to discern what’s truly aligned.

4️⃣ Asking for Help, Receiving SupportI reflect on a recent conversation with my partner and how I’m learning that I don’t have to process everything alone. Sometimes, we just need a gentle mirror and a safe nudge toward our truth.

5️⃣ Spiritual Crisis, AgainI revisit the recent spiritual spiral I went through and how seeking grounding through nature, psychic guidance, and honest conversations brought me back to myself. Support matters.

6️⃣ The Podcast as ProcessingThis space is a stream-of-life, not just consciousness. I speak to process, and that process becomes insight. Sometimes I only understand what I’m feeling once I say it out loud.

7️⃣ Guides & Gentle SynchronicitiesI continue softening into the possibility that I have guides. I share a few small synchronicities that felt like subtle support. I don’t expect them to hand me answers—but I do believe they walk with me.

8️⃣ Grounding Through NatureThe medicine of earth, sand, and presence keeps showing up. When things get cosmic or overwhelming, I return to the body, to stillness, to the earth beneath me.

9️⃣ Reconnecting with Ancestral LineageAs I explore Ram Dass’ teachings, I’m also being pulled toward learning more about my own indigenous roots—from Mexico and the Andean region. I want to connect with my lineage in a way that’s loving, intentional, and deeply respectful.

🔟 Decolonizing the Body & MindI reflect on reading Decolonizing the Body and how the concept of colonization—once triggering—has become something I’m willing to look at more closely. I’m exploring how colonialism shaped the way I relate to culture, service, and even language.

1️⃣1️⃣ Language, Lineage, and LongingI share my complex relationship with Spanish, how my father didn’t teach it to us, and how I cried when a college course in Quechua was canceled. These moments are calling me back to the languages and lineages in my bones.

1️⃣2️⃣ Caution vs. Curiosity in Ancestral WorkI am starting to unpack reconnecting with indigenous traditions I belong to by blood (according to a DNA test, which I know are questionable), yet didn’t grow up with. I explore the difference between honoring and extracting—and how I’m moving forward with humility and care.

1️⃣3️⃣ Colonization Affects EveryoneWhile some teachings around colonization didn’t resonate at first, I now see how colonization affected everyone—just not equally. I’m beginning to understand how reclaiming ancestry is part of collective healing.

1️⃣4️⃣ Synchronicity & Right TimingEvery time I surrender my seeking, something shows up—like a free workshop on bloodline awakening, right after I opened the door to exploring my roots. These synchronicities guide me more than plans ever could.

1️⃣5️⃣ Curiosity Over CertaintyInstead of needing to “know” or “do” something with my ancestry, I’m letting myself explore. I’m choosing reverence over rush. This isn’t about identity performance—it’s about feeling what’s true.

🌀 The Bottom Line: Roots & Ram DassThis episode is about grounding in your truth, surrendering the need to know it all, and allowing life to reveal itself in layers. Your ancestors are with you. The earth is holding you. You don’t have to rush. You just have to be.

Mentions & Resourcesnot affiliated, just sharing what’s alive for me

💖 Be Here Now by Ram Dass – A mystic portal and a present-moment anchor📘 Decolonizing the Body by Kelsey Blackwell – Reflections on ancestral reclamation🌿 Entangled Life by Merlin Sheldrake – Fungi as a metaphor for connection🍂 Quechua & Indigenous Languages – A calling I’ve felt for years🧘 Yoga Nidra – A personal practice I’m choosing to keep personal (for now)🌀 Bloodline Awakening Workshop – Led by Dr. Rocio Rosales Meza, a synchronicity🌍 Nature – My forever guide and grounding force🎤 This Podcast – A living record of becoming, one breath at a time

❤️ Core Message @ me ❤️Sometimes, the lesson isn’t in getting the refund—it’s in letting go. You’re not here to accumulate more. You’re here to remember what’s already within you. There is wisdom in your roots. There is guidance in your rhythm. Trust that.

In order to be here, I had to have dozens and dozens and dozens of ancestors, so in this moment I’d like to express my deep gratitude for them and for the planet which to me is the ultimate ancestor.

Mystically,

Belle