It's that Airbnb pasta-taxonomy poster in pop-song form: "Lasagna," Weird Al's take on Los Lobos's take on Ritchie Valens's take on the Mexican folk song Sarah and her classmates dutifully droned during first-period Spanish. Before we cast our votes (and yours!), we talk about the restaurant from Big, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, Dr. Melfi's ex-husband, Sophia Petrillo, forgetting the word "benefit," and Polish jokes. Are we putting the "no" back in "buongiorno"? Listen and see!

Our intro is by Laura Barger and Giacomo Baldelli, and our outro is by Claudio Villa for the Big Night soundtrack. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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Late-sixties melodrama meets early-nineties blockbuster in today's episode, as we contemplate who left the Barney cake out in the rain while comparing Richard Harris's "MacArthur Park" and Weird Al's "Jurassic Park." Claymation, foiled cantatae, The Odyssey, Godspell, and songs for when the coffee's kickin' in, plus the YouTube-comments bingo card and an "un-preciation" of a popular novel, all factor into our discussion. Listen and enjoy unironically!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by the Association. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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The unique legacy of Tommy James and the Shondells adds another chapter today, as Weird Al contends with Tiffany's smash cover of "I Think We're Alone Now." We're discussing Jersey-girl aspirational fashion, budge sound that's a feature and not a bug, and that person you could know becoming that person everyone does know. Take a break from sewing patches on your jean jacket and have a listen!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by the Ramones. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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Can Weird Al inch ahead in the season standings with "I Lost On Jeopardy," his parody of the Greg Kihn Band's "Jeopardy"? We're talking early adopters, terrible album-title puns we admire, second careers, cheap-but-creepy videos, and how MB's personal Jeopardy! journey deepens his appreciation of this Yankovic joint. Tell 'em what they've won, Don Pardo! (It's either an all-new WAvE episode or some Rice-a-Roni.)

Our intro is by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli, and our outro is by the Waitresses. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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This week's match-up pits The Presidents of the United States of America's "Lump" against Weird Al's "Gump"...but is it really a face-off if the original is two thirds of the way towards being the parody? What is the age of Al-wakening? What's the difference between "unserious" and "unpretentious"? Are butt-adjacent references the Yankovic equivalent of a Hitchcock cameo? And did Al have any choice when it came to his subject matter back then? Watch out for those shifting matrices; it's an all-new ep of MASTAS.

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by the Offspring. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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"What if we just........didn't." That's one of the questions confronting us as WE confront an out-of-character entry in the Weird Al songbook: "Fat." The problems don't start there; there's the cheap-sounding and turgidly self-serious original, "Bad"; by problematic artist Michael Jackson; the risible video by MJ, and the shortcutsy cruelty from WA...there's even an ill-advised decision in a high-school talent show. Bass requests, Staying Alive references, and conscientious objections: it's an all-new MASTAS!

Our intro is by Laura Barger and Jack Baldelli, and our outro is by the Stone Roses. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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Grab a tube sock for your privates: it's time to pit the Red Hot Chili Peppers against Weird Al! Before Mark makes the pun that drives our listenership numbers off a cliff, we're discussing the omnipresent Chilis hits "Under The Bridge" and "Give It Away"; how many songs Weird Al might have tried to fit his Flintstones joke set into before settling on these; the five items '90s dorm rooms had to contain lest their occupants risk expulsion; and the difference between "sexy" and "just always naked all the time." Hashtag justice for the Bee Girl: it's an all-new episode of MASTAS!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne, and our outro is by Queens of the Stone Age. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes of this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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Welcome to the Weird Al vs. Everybody season of MASTAS! We're looking at a couple dozen Weird Al Yankovic songs and the originals that inspired him, and choosing a winner in each match-up -- starting with Coolio homage "Amish Paradise"! Before we get into self-serious videos for movies we think might be fake, cultural appropriation of pre-tech societies, and how Stevie Wonder feels about our swearing, we've got an important announcement about voting and future in-person events...but then we're back to discussing whether Weird Al-chemy turns "Gangsta's" into gold. Listen now, English!

Our intro is by David Gregory Byrne; the WAvE theme-let is a mash-up of Oingo Boingo, Elvis Costello, Black Box, and Michael Buffer; and our outro is by The Primitives. For more information/to become a patron of the show and hear all episodes this season, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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The competition is over, but the discussion of comeback songs isn't -- and today's is about comebacks in the answer/clapback sense. Seven "answer" songs come under the MASTAScope, as well as the frequency with which Neil Young is told to shut it, Bavaria's unexpected move to Ireland, the Judy Cycle opera we need to see, and pop songs that have become microplastics in their ubiquity. Vaseline those teeth and have a listen.

Our outro for today's episode is by Neil Young. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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It's time to declare a winner -- the definitive pop-music comeback song -- but the road to the final result is a twisty one. "Believe" and "Walk This Way" each crystallize the concept of the comeback, but in different ways, so to help us choose, we're watching videos, discussing the synecdoche of Cher, rummaging through a bin of PhD-thesis topics, and resisting arithmetic. Is the outcome predictable, or precedent-setting? AutoTune a drum roll and listen!

Our intro is an LL Byrne J mash-up, and our outro is by the Strokes. For more information/to become a patron of the show, visit patreon.com/mastas.

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