In 2018 Caroline Roodhouse was bereaved by suicide. Over the past six years, she has struggled to come to terms with her husband Steve’s death and how it has affected her and her two young daughters. But she has also shown incredible strength.

This week Caroline shares her personal journey of loss and healing. She tells Paul about the day Steve went missing and the subsequent two-day search, and describes how his sudden death left her in shock, leading to years of emotional turmoil, including anger, guilt, and severe struggles with her own mental health. She also recounts the impact of Steve’s death on their daughters, who have shown remarkable resilience in dealing with the stigma surrounding suicide.

Caroline reflects on how societal expectations contribute to men’s mental health struggles, urging men to reject these pressures and focus on the people who love them. And she stresses the importance of living in the present, finding strength in family, and embracing moments of hope amidst tragedy.

Through her writing and public speaking, Caroline hopes to raise awareness about the devastating effects of suicide and to encourage others to seek help. She has now written a book, Daddy Blackbird, which is available on Amazon.

If you, or anyone around you, is affected by this episode, you can contact the Samaritans on 116 123 or text "SHOUT" to 85258.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-midlife-stories-caroline-roodhouse

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

One man dies by suicide every two hours in England and Wales, and the rate among men in their 40s and 50s is especially high. At a time when mens’ roles are changing so rapidly, cultural pressure for men to appear strong is unhelpful, and societal expectations of men, particularly stigma around vulnerability, prevent many from seeking help.

This week Paul talks to Mike Flynn, a facilitator at Andy’s Man Club, a UK-based charity aimed at suicide prevention. Mike openly shares his personal experiences of mental health, including anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts, and emphasises the importance of early intervention, encouraging men to reach out for support before hitting crisis point.

Andy’s Man Club is founded on the premise that it’s okay to talk about mental health issues and to seek help. It provides a safe and non-judgemental space for men to share their feelings, with the aim of helping men well before they reach the stage of suicidal ideation.

If you, or anyone around you, is affected by this episode, you can contact the Samaritans on 116 123 or text "SHOUT" to 85258.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-male-suicide-crisis

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

Changing career in middle age is perceived by many to be incredibly challenging and even unwise. Societal expectations often shape our perceptions of success, leading some midlife men to feel trapped in careers they no longer enjoy. They become disengaged and unfulfilled, and unsure of how to make any sort of change.

But it needn’t be this way. This week Paul talks to career coach Laura Allen, about navigating a midlife career transition. They look at the importance of aligning work with personal values and goals, and address common issues like burnout and the sunk cost fallacy. 

They look at some of the constraints around changing careers, such as financial commitments, and talk about finding fulfilment through both career pivots and passion projects.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-change-career

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

In one of the most striking midlife career pivots you’ll hear about, Dirk Singer went from a 20 year career owning and running PR and social media agencies to become an expert in sustainable aviation.

This week Paul uncovers the whys and hows of Dirk’s story. They talk about how Dirk lost his passion for the digital marketing industry and how he then made the pivot to climate tech. And they also discuss the challenges and rewards of such as transition, the importance of continuous learning, and the challenges of overcoming age prejudice and the notion that people in their 50s can’t learn new skills or change careers.

The show also touches on areas as diverse as the financial and other demands on Dirk as he cares for his disabled son, the fact that retirement should now be on the horizon, and the importance of purpose and optimism in maintaining professional fulfilment and personal growth.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-midlife-stories-dirk-singer

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

Midlife men often experience discontent and dissatisfaction, and it's important to take action to redesign this phase of life to maximise the future. Prioritising self-care, trying new things, and aligning personal growth with fun and momentum is an important step in this process.

This week Paul talks to midlife coach, author and podcaster Greg Scheinman about the challenges that men face in taking back control over their time, and about why this is not selfish but instead essential for showing up better in all aspects of life.

They discuss the importance of reframing perspective to find happiness and fulfilment, with an emphasis on being willing to try new things, embracing curiosity and making conscious choices in order to rediscover the fun in life.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-fun

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

Some of the big challenges faced by midlife men are triggered by a creeping awareness of time passing and a desire to reclaim control over one's life. Awareness of our own mortality, normally prompted by the death of a parent or another loved one, can be confusing and daunting, whether consciously or subconsciously.

Self awareness and acknowledgement of these feelings is critical when it comes to navigating this challenge. This week Paul talks to leadership coach Andrew Waddell about facing and embracing our mortality with a view to living a purposeful and rich second half of life.

The discussion touches on societal taboos and attitudes around death, and highlights the importance of expressing emotions and seeking emotional support whether through friends, family, or professionals regardless of outdated expectations about a lack of open dialogue about feelings. By shifting our mindset, and being willing to confront difficult emotions, we can move from a place of feeling lost to one of possibility and fulfilment.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-facing-mortality

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

Many midlife men feel trapped by societal expectations and the lives they've designed for themselves, leading to dissatisfaction with life and a loss of identity. But it doesn’t need to be this way.

This week Paul and his special guest, author and midlife coach Dan Stanley, discuss the challenges of midlife crises and share personal experiences of self-discovery. They look at the importance of self-awareness and shedding masks to reveal one's true identity while living intentionally.

Redefining success beyond external achievements and finding a safe space to express oneself without judgement are important considerations in midlife. And for men especially, the ability to engage in honest conversations, challenge outdated patriarchal models, and embrace a more compassionate and empathetic form of masculinity can lead to more purposeful and content lives.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-trapped-by-life

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

Midlife men face many challenges, not least of which are emotional struggles and the stigma associated with being middle aged. We frequently feel disconnected, frustrated and lonely due to societal pressures to suppress our emotions. This period, marked by low life satisfaction, peaks in our late 40s, when divorce rates and suicide rates are also at their highest.

This week Paul introduces three coaches to provide insights on navigating midlife; Dan Stanley, Greg Scheinman and Andrew Waddell. Together they talk about the inevitability of midlife reflection, discuss the common "is this it?" moment, and reveal the mindsets of those who thrive in midlife and those who struggle.

As well as providing information on midlife transitions, the show encourages proactive planning and self-awareness. It stresses the importance of alignment in life, making conscious choices, and shifting mindsets to focus on meaningful experiences. By understanding and addressing these challenges, men can be more fulfilled and joyful in the second half of their lives.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-midlife-crash-course

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com

I'm Paul Sutton, and in early 2024 I had what is commonly referred to as a 'midlife crisis'. After a couple of years of experiencing a creeping sense of unease about my life, things came to a head when the resentment and frustration I'd been feeling started to boil over. I felt trapped by the life that I had designed, I felt that I had no sense of purpose, I felt lonely, and I had no sense of who I was or what my place in the world was. I looked around at my life and thought: "is this it?"

Since then I've been on a journey of discovery and personal growth. I've read books and I've spoken to experts on male midlife, and everything I've found out has amazed me. Why isn't this something that is talked about?

That's what Middle Man is all about. It's the show that helps men, and their partners, understand and navigate the challenges of midlife to lead more joyful, rewarding and meaningful lives. In this first episode I tell my own story and what led to the creation of the podcast, and I introduce some of the people we'll meet over the coming weeks to help guide us.

You can read the full transcript for this episode at www.middlemanpodcast.com/transcript-i-am-middle-man

I'd love to hear about your experiences, so if you'd like to get in touch email me at [email protected] and let me know what's on your mind or sign up to the newsletter at www.middlemanpodcast.com