Midlife Advice | Perimenopause, Hormones and Midlife Women’s Health

You've heard you need to lift heavy to build (or keep!) your muscle after 40. But what if your body just isn’t cooperating with that plan right now? Good news: there's another way, and science backs it up.

I've been training with Ashley Selman for months, and I've been waiting to record this episode because I knew it was going to be the one everyone sends to a friend.

Ashley has 30+ years of experience training Olympic athletes, including Jackie Joyner-Kersee and Brandi Chastain, and coaching at Stanford and the University of Oregon. Now she works with midlife women. And the method she uses, blood flow restriction training, is something most of us have never heard of.

Here's the version I wish someone had explained to me: little rubber cuffs on your arms and legs, 5-pound weights, 20 minutes, at home. Same muscle-building response as heavy lifting. Not a gimmick. Studied for decades.

In this episode we cover:

• What BFR actually is and why the name sounds more alarming than it should
• The science behind why light weights can trigger the same response as heavy lifting
• Why this is such a good fit for women in perimenopause and menopause specifically
• How it helps with weight loss, belly fat, and the body composition stuff that won't budge
• The cardio benefits nobody sees coming from a strength workout
• How to start at home without needing a coach in the room with you

Ashley also shares her own story: hip replacement at 43, menopause at 43, lost 8 pounds of muscle. Found BFR and her life changed.

If your body has been telling you the advice everyone gives you doesn't fit your life right now, this one is for you.

💪 Connect with Ashley: selistrength.com | @selistrength

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

Tried every diet and still can't make it stick? Certified life coach and bestselling author Lizzie Merritt is here to tell you it's not your fault, and to explain a completely different approach to weight loss after 40 that starts with your brain and nervous system, not a food plan.

If you've counted calories, tracked macros, done the cleanses, and found yourself starting over on Monday more times than you can count, you will want to hear this.

Lizzie Merritt, bestselling author of LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss, explains why traditional diets fail so many midlife women, and what a brain-based approach offers instead.

In this conversation, we cover:

• Why your brain cannot build new habits when your nervous system does not feel safe
• Two common patterns that drive emotional eating in midlife women: people pleasing and perfectionism
• The LIGHT Method: a five-step framework that treats weight loss as learning, not rule-following
• Why changing 'I am trying to lose weight' to 'I am training to lose weight' matters more than it sounds
• What happens after you hit your goal weight, and how identity shapes long-term success

Lizzie also shares the one mindset shift that helped her clients break the start-over-Monday cycle for good.

Resources from this episode:

• LIGHT: The New Psychology of Weight Loss | https://amzn.to/4uCqyJm
• The Confident Body Podcast | https://confidentbody.coach/podcast/
• ConfidentBody.coach | https://confidentbody.coach/

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

Why you can’t relax, even when you finally have time, and what it has to do with your nervous system.

You finally have a break. The house is quiet. There’s nothing urgent to do.
And instead of relaxing…you feel restless. Anxious. Like you should be doing something.

In this solo episode, I’m digging into why so many midlife women struggle to slow down (even when we want to) and why that uncomfortable, ants-y feeling isn’t a mindset problem, it’s a nervous system response.

After years (or decades) of being in go-go-go mode taking care of everyone, managing everything and always being “on,” your body has learned that slowing down doesn’t feel safe. So when you finally have time to rest, your system pushes back.

We’re talking about what’s really happening in your body in those moments and how you can start retraining your nervous system to actually feel calm again.

If you’ve ever thought, “I don’t even know how to relax anymore,” this episode will hit home.

➡️ My brand new group breathwork program for midlife women called Hello, Next-Level You is coming soon! Join the waitlist here! https://belongwellness.myflodesk.com/vzidtovzh7

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

Dry skin after 40? Sensitive, aging skin that keeps getting worse? Your skincare routine might be part of the problem. Botanical formulator May Lindstrom explains what midlife skin actually needs and what to stop doing.

If your skin has changed in your 40s or 50s and your routine keeps getting longer without getting better results, this conversation is going to shift how you think about your skin.

May Lindstrom, founder of May Lindstrom Skin, has been formulating luxury organic skincare for sensitive, changing skin for over 20 years. In this episode, she gets specific about what is actually happening to midlife skin, why more products tend to backfire, which ingredients genuinely help, and one thing most women do every single day that might be working against them.

What we cover:

• How to simplify your routine without losing results
• Ingredients to look for (and ones hiding in popular products that may be making things worse)
• Whether natural and organic skincare can actually deliver results
• Where to invest in skincare and where it matters less
• One habit most women have right after washing their face that a 20-year formulator says to stop

Guest: May Lindstrom, Founder and CEO of May Lindstrom Skin

Website: maylindstrom.com | Instagram: @maylindstromskin

The serum and moisturizer May recommends. These are affiliate links because I LOVE these products!

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

Struggling with communication in your relationship or feeling unheard by your partner? 

Not feeling heard in a relationship is one of the most common challenges for midlife women, especially in long-term partnerships where conversations can start to feel like logistics, criticism, or defensiveness instead of real connection. If you’ve ever wondered why communication in your relationship feels harder than it used to, or why you and your partner keep having the same conversations without actually feeling understood, you’re in the right place.

In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Stephanie Bacon to discuss why relationship communication often breaks down in midlife and what actually helps. She shares a simple, practical 5-step communication framework called PHIES that helps you slow down, regulate your nervous system, and communicate what’s really going on beneath the surface so both you and your partner feel seen, heard, and understood.

We talk about how to stop trying to be right, how to navigate defensiveness (yours and theirs), and how to rebuild emotional connection in a relationship that still matters deeply to you.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why communication in long-term relationships gets harder in midlife

• The PHIES framework (and how to use it in real conversations)

• What’s actually happening when your partner gets defensive

• How to feel heard without turning every conversation into a fight

• A simple mindset shift that can completely change your relationship

Connect with Dr. Steph:

RippleEffectEmbodiedSEL.com | @RippleEffectwithDrSteph

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

If you’re dealing with brain fog, fatigue, mood swings, irritability, low energy, or a metabolism that feels like it has completely changed in midlife, this episode is worth a listen.

We talk so much about hormones in perimenopause and menopause, but what if there’s another foundational piece of midlife health that almost no one is talking about? In this episode, Jessica talks with Functional Diagnostic Nutrition Practitioner Dori Martin about hidden mineral imbalances, how they can affect energy, stress, mood, metabolism, and nutrient absorption, and why they may be a missing piece for midlife women who still feel off even when they’re doing all the “right” things.

Dori explains what Hair Tissue Mineral Analysis (HTMA) is, how this mineral test works, what minerals matter most, and how mineral imbalances may contribute to symptoms like brain fog, fatigue, irritability, and mood swings. They also talk about chronic stress, burnout, heavy metals, nervous system regulation, and what you can actually do if your minerals are off through nutrition, lifestyle, and targeted support. Jessica also shares an important post-interview clarification about how the hair sample is collected and what to know if you color your hair.

Connect with Dori:

Website → https://www.dorimartin.com/

Instagram → @midlifeenergy.dori

🎧 Other episodes you’ll love:

61: Do Peptides Help with Sleep, Energy, and Weight Gain in Perimenopause?

47: Why You Don’t Feel Like Yourself in Perimenopause (& How to Get Your Groove Back)

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

Ever catch yourself thinking… why does work feel so hard lately?

You’re showing up, doing everything “right,” and yet you feel more exhausted, more disconnected, and less motivated than ever. If you’ve been wondering if your job is even right for you anymore—or if you’re dealing with career burnout, overwork, or that nagging sense that something is off—this episode is for you.

In this conversation, I sit down with Allie Stark, leadership coach to high-level female founders, to discuss why hustle culture stops working for women in midlife, and what a different way of working could actually look like. We explore the idea of a “feminine economy”—a model rooted in collaboration, support, boundaries, and sustainable success—and how shifting the way you work can change not just your career, but how you feel in your life.

We also talk about what to do if you’re burned out at work but not ready to quit, how to set boundaries in a high-pressure job, and why your job feeling harder lately might be a signal—not a failure.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why work feels so hard lately (even when nothing is “wrong”)

• Career burnout and how hustle culture contributes to it

• What a feminine economy is and how it changes the way we work

• How to stop overworking and start setting boundaries at work

• What to do if you feel stuck in your job but aren’t ready to leave

• How to explore career change or new opportunities without blowing up your life

Connect with Allie:

Allie Stark Wellness → https://www.alliestarkwellness.com/

Noria (The Residency Network) → https://hellonoria.com/

🎧 Other Episodes You’ll Love:

Director to VP Promotion: Why High-Performing Midlife Women Get Stuck in Corporate Leadership

Midlife Overdrive and Why Slowing Down Feels Hard

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

If it feels like your life is passing you by and you’re not fully in it, let’s talk.

You’re keeping everything running, everyone’s taken care of, nothing is wrong…but you’re not exactly feeling like the main character in your life either. Am I right?

This is your invitation to pause, check in, and get back on track without overhauling everything. Seriously, we’re keeping it easy peasy because who needs one more thing to do?

In this solo episode, I’m walking you through a simple reset using your intentions as a guide. I share how I’m evaluating what’s working (and what’s not) for me, what it looks like to make decisions from the standpoint of your future self, and why small shifts—not big dramatic changes—are what move you forward. 

If you’ve been stuck in autopilot, this will help you step back into the driver’s seat.

I talk about what it means to live on purpose in midlife, how to reconnect with yourself when life feels busy and disconnected, and why slowing down—even briefly—can change everything. You’ll walk away with one small, doable step to realign your life starting this week.

🎧Other Episodes You’ll Love:

56: Midlife Overdrive and Why Slowing Down Feels Hard

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

Can you delay menopause—and is your timeline more in your control than you think?

Perimenopause can feel like a moving target you have zero control over—your weight, your mood, your sleep, even when menopause will actually happen. But what if some of this isn’t as predetermined as we’ve been led to believe?

In this episode, Dr. Miranda Naylor and I are diving into whether you can actually delay menopause, and what really affects your hormones in midlife. We talk about ovarian aging (in plain English), the lifestyle factors that may influence your menopause timeline, and what matters most if you’re already in perimenopause. 

You’ll also hear what’s within your control (and what’s not), so you can stop guessing and start making more informed decisions about your health. If you’ve ever wondered why perimenopause feels so unpredictable—or whether you can change your experience of it—this conversation will give you a clearer, more grounded perspective.

Connect with Dr. Naylor:

• Visit her website: https://drmirandanaylor.com
• Take her hormone quiz: https://drmirandanaylor.com/hormone-quiz-start/
• Listen to her podcast: Modern Women's Wellness

➡️ If this episode helped you feel a little more informed—and a little less at the mercy of your hormones—please share it with a friend who’s also navigating perimenopause.

⭐️ And please leave a 5-star rating and positive review for the show! This helps me book badass guests like Dr. Miranda who have so much wisdom to share. 

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong

If your house feels cluttered but the thought of tackling it sounds like pure torture, this 15-minute daily habit might just change your mind and your approach.

A lot of midlife women are craving a calmer home—but between work, kids, relationships, and the general mental load of life, the idea of decluttering the whole house can feel like standing at the base of Mount Everest.

In this episode, Jessica talks with organizing coach Tracy Hoth about a much more realistic approach: a 15-minute daily decluttering habit. Instead of waiting for the mythical “free weekend” to finally get organized, Tracy teaches women how to make steady progress in small, doable increments.

She shares the five simple steps she’s been teaching for over 17 years—sort, purge, assign homes, contain, and energize—and explains why clutter isn’t just a visual annoyance. It can quietly drain your energy, raise stress levels, and even create friction in your relationships at home.

If you’ve ever looked around your house and thought, Where do I even start? this conversation will give you a simple place to begin.

✨Connect with Tracy

Tracy’s 15-Minute Declutter Challenge | SimplySquaredAway.com | The Organized Coach Podcast | Instagram

➡️ Share This Episode

If this episode got you thinking about tackling that one drawer, closet, or corner that’s been driving you nuts, send it to a friend who might want to join you.

🎧Other Episodes You’ll Love

Midlife Overdrive and Why Slowing Down Feels Hard

I want to hear from you. Send me a text or voicemail!

Jessica's freebies and resources:

😴 Sleep better tonight with my free 10-minute audio breathwork session. (https://your.belongwellness.com/sleep)

✨For more midlife advice on perimenopause, hormone health, nervous system regulation, and living with purpose in your 40s and 50s follow me: @midlifeadvicepodcast | @heyjessicalong