Divorce Dialogues

Navigating the Waters of Parental Alienation with Dr. Amy J. L. Baker


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If you are the targeted parent in a case of parental alienation, it is easy to default to defensiveness. But responding with righteous indignation is actually counterproductive, making you look anxious, agitated and afraid. So, how can you approach the situation in a constructive way that won’t further alienate your child—or the custody evaluator assigned to your case?
Dr. Amy J. L. Baker is a nationally recognized expert in parental alienation and the emotional abuse of children. She has written more than 115 publications including eight books on the topic of parent-child relationships, children of divorce and parental alienation syndrome. Dr. Baker serves as an expert witness and coaches parents dealing with alienated children and alienating co-parents. She is also the Director of Research at the Vincent J. Fontana Center for Child Protection. Dr. Baker holds a PhD in Developmental Psychology from Teachers College of Columbia University.
Today, Dr. Baker joins Katherine to discuss the ins and outs of parental alienation. She walks us through the four components that must be present for a situation to qualify as parental alienation and several of the behaviors kids exhibit in a ‘campaign of denigration.’ Dr. Baker shares her approach to addressing false accusations if you are the target of parental alienation, describing the value in approaching kids with compassion and empathy. Listen in for Dr. Baker’s advice on exhibiting humility with a custody evaluator and learn what to do if you’re the victim of parental alienation.
Topics Covered
The formal definition of parental alienation
The four components necessary to qualify as parental alienation
Prior positive relationship
Absence of abuse, neglect
Favored parent exhibits alienating behaviors
Kids exhibit behaviors unique to alienation
The characteristics of a ‘campaign of denigration’
How to approach a child making false accusations
Gratitude, compassion and empathy
Correct the lie and go back to compassion
How to gauge the intentionality of the favored parent’s behavior
What to do if you are the victim of parental alienation
The value in presenting yourself with humility to a custody evaluator
The need for training for legal professionals around parental alienation
The tendency for judges to support the status quo
Connect with Dr. Amy J. L. Baker
Dr. Baker’s Website: http://amyjlbaker.com
Resources
Co-Parenting with a Toxic Ex: What to Do When Your Ex-Spouse Tries to Turn the Kids Against You by Amy J. L. Baker and Paul R. Fine: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1608829588/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&linkCode=sl1&tag=msccomputersy-20&linkId=d6b93910214fbeb440532f6f3bb0061c
The High-Conflict Custody Battle: Protect Yourself and Your Kids from a Toxic Divorce, False Accusations & Parental Alienation by Amy J. L. Baker, J. Michael Bone and Brian Ludmer: https://www.amazon.com/High-Conflict-Custody-Battle-Accusations-Alienation/dp/1626250731
Connect with Katherine Miller
The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
Call (914) 738-7765
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Divorce DialoguesBy Katherine Miller

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