One more argument.  One more struggle.  They sat on my couch, facing each other down as opponents in some contest to... win... well, to be honest, I don't know what they were trying to win.  Because they were not winning at marriage!

I stopped them, looked at them and said, "You do know you are on the same team..." and they stared blankly at me, so I continued, "... right??"

They certainly were not working like a team.  They were acting like enemies, in competition with each other.  They were struggling to win.  But either one "winning" would be a "lose" for the marriage.

Too many people miss this one essential -- crucial -- fact about marriage... you both are on the same team.  You are working toward a common goal (or should be).  The task is not winning as an individual, but as a team, as a couple, as a family.

This is the fundamental point of being what I call a "WE."  WE are in this together; WE stand side-by-side; WE have each other's back; WE are a team!  Same side, same direction (or should be).

Listen to this episode for how to get on the same team!

RELATED RESOURCES:

Connecting

Being A WE

Conflict

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