“Nostalgia isn’t rational, and just like Warrant’s 1990 song “Cherry Pie” reminds me of 1989 more than the recorded sound of my own voice from 1989, watching the movie Dazed and Confused for the first time literally made me long for a time in life that was less happy than the time I was living in when I saw it.” — Rolf Potts

In this essay episode of Deviate Rolf talks about four recent factors in his life that have changed the ways he views nostalgia (4:00); how he may well could have been killed in a motorcycle wreck in Asia in 2019, and how the accident affected his way of seeing the world in the months after it happened (8:30); how the word “nostalgia” has conventionally been defined, in both the modern and premodern sense (18:45); Rolf’s complicated memories of youthful interactions with movies like Star Wars, Dazed and Confused, and Before Sunrise (23:00); how Rolf met a traveler named Kristen Bush (aka “Kiki”) in Kansas during the pandemic, and what factors made their connection unique (34:45); how Michel de Montaigne made sense of his near-fatal horse accident in the 16th century, versus how Rolf has come to make sense of his motorcycle accident in Asia (40:00); how Rolf has trouble intuiting his own past when he listens to his own voice on old cassette tapes (43:30); and how Rolf and Kiki have come to make sense of their past, present, and future together, and how this pandemic moment will one day feed its own nostalgia (48:30).

Kristen Bush is an actress, known for Paterno (2018), Liberal Arts (2012), and Synecdoche, New York (2008). Her TV credits include The Affair, The Good Wife, Elementary, and Law & Order: SVU. She has performed onstage at Manhattan Theatre Club, The Public, the Old Globe, Goodman Theatre, and Lincoln Center.

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