The Neurodivergent Experience

Re-Run | Pathological Demand Avoidance: The Everyday Struggle You Can’t See


Listen Later

Hey everyone! We’re taking our own advice this week and looking after our energy levels — both of us enjoying a week off post-Christmas to get back into our routines and doing our best to avoid PDA. So instead of a brand-new episode today, we’re re-running one of our most popular and meaningful conversations. Thank you so much for your understanding as we take a breather — so please enjoy one of our favourite episodes from 2025.


Struggling with everyday tasks as a neurodivergent adult? In this candid and insightful episode of The Neurodivergent Experience, hosts Jordan James and Simon Scott unpack the lived reality of Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) — a form of demand sensitivity often misunderstood, dismissed, or mislabelled as laziness.


From dodging the dishwasher to putting off doctor’s appointments, and from procrastinating over paperwork to resisting even self-imposed goals, we explore:

  • What PDA really is — and why the NHS still doesn’t formally recognise it
  • How demands (even ones we place on ourselves) trigger an instant “no” response
  • The link between PDA, trauma, anxiety, and the obsessive need for autonomy
  • Why even fun things can feel impossible once they become obligations
  • Practical examples: chores, eating, car washes, and the endless hurdle race of daily life
  • Partner strategies — how reframing demands as favours can unlock cooperation
  • Why small wins matter: celebrating every task completed as a genuine victory
  • How to create accommodations that turn mountains back into molehills


Whether you’re living with PDA yourself, raising a neurodivergent child, or just want to understand why “simple” tasks aren’t simple at all, this conversation blends raw honesty, humour, and real-world strategies for navigating life when demand avoidance touches everything.


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The Neurodivergent ExperienceBy Jordan James and Simon Scott

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