Regular Features

Guess what, we're pivoting to HONEY SALES now. That's right, Regular Features has produced a small batch of 100% organic honey with the help of a hive of bees in North London. Visit our shop at the link below to grab your jar of our special sticky reserve today, before they're all gone!

https://regularfeatures.com/shop/honey-by-regular-features/

To celebrate our new venture, in this episode we take you behind the scenes on a tour of the very hive our honey got scraped out of. We can hardly believe it either.

You have some nerve showing your face around here after what you did. But since you're here, you might as well stay and listen. In this episode, Joe demystifies the British parliamentary process. Log helps out a mum in need. Steve got too hot in a heatwave.

Imagine YOU were the Hotstepper. How would YOU like it if you heard everyone saying "Here come the Hotstepper" every single time they saw you?

"Look busy," whispers Daniel in Accounts Payable, shuffling urgently past HR with a folder clutched to his chest. "I just saw the Hotstepper getting out of the lift." You might be London's fanciest Hotstepper by night, but by day you're Martin Pickering, area manager for Bridlington Diagnostics. And you just want to DO YOUR JOB

In this TECHNICAL DIFFICULTY PLAGUED EPISODE, Gav gets his likeness used and abused and it lands a little too close to home for comfort, and Log has news for you about Castles, Wasps, and Printers.

With thanks to absolute unit MIke Orvis for The Bee-Witcher Jingle

This might sound like a special in which we include deleted scenes from past episodes of Regular Features, but it ISN'T.

What it actually contains is Log and Joe joining forces for a never-before-seen twoboy episode in which they theme multiple micro-features along the theme of deleted scenes. We've got the Green Mile, we've got Se7en, we've got Big Yellow Taxi, we've got My Baby All-Gone, and we've got even more tenuous connections than that.

And if you DARE suggest that this is being called a special because we hadn't properly counted how many episodes there were before the episode 500 live show, we will just kick right off, capisce?!

Fig Leaf Rag Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)

Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License

http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/

"Breaking News" Credit: https://www.FesliyanStudios.com Background Music

Some days you're the horse. Other days you're the horse's secret collection of amethysts he keeps under a big pile of hay in his stable.

In this episode, Log tries to fill a printer-shaped hole in his soul with a laserjet. Matt springs a painterly pop-quiz on us. And Steve finds a way to reconcile with his dad. Let's go!

Chalk and cheese. You'd think they'd be disgusting together, but I'm eating some right now and it's absolutely delicious exchept forr hoaw it claggxx up mah mouuut. Aneewoy I shupposh iss tym to chell yoo abow thisz weekss epishold of Rehgyolnah Peeches.

Shteef hash sheen duh Dishnee Pixaaaaaah moofie Laghtyeeah and ish dinsgustin!! Jhoh izz on tze hunnt fo a Wikinpeeedinah paych antd.... *spits* Log has visited a number of National Trust heritage sites. Time for another bite I think!

HAAFFF A GRAY WEEEEENK!

Four score and Michael Barrymore.

Sorry, that's all I've got. Thanks for reading this bit. In this episode, Gav looms over us like a ghost, Steve's got laser eye surgery, and Log's a mean little goblin with a mission to pang the queen, That's right, PANG!

We love you.

How did you get in here? This is a supposed to be a private crematorium. You shouldn't be riding your penny farthing around the crematorium honking on that antique horn of yours. Watch out for that pile of unburnt cadavers! Oh no, you've knocked them all over and their toe tags got all mixed up – now we won't know which grieving widows get which urns. Look, we promise we won't tell on you for goofing around the crematorium if you don't tell the widows we're doling out rando-ashes. Deal? Deal!

In this episode, Joe discovers another celebrity NFT grift. Steve's seen the new Lord of the Rings: Gollum game. And Log's been to Big London on a riverboat tour.

GO!

This week's episode of Regular Features is presented, as always, in high-quality .wav format. You make a .wav by walking up the holy mountain and holding your Zune to the sky. A single raindrop will fall into the 3.5mm headphone jack, and a .wav will be shat out. It's beautiful.

This week's .wav is filled with a spicy, sexy episode of Star Trek, a look into the newest FIFA game on PS2, and a discussion of why you'd ever want to be in a bath full of Beelzebub's juice - wine.

This week the fellas are joined by two very special guests Orson Welles and one other person whom I shall not be naming here lest I rob you of the excitement we all felt in the room when he showed up.