Colin revs his engines with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth watching Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man (1991), a neo-Western starring Mickey Rourke and Don Johnson as the titular anti-heroes who rob a bank to save their friend's bar and find themselves the target of futuristic drug smugglers. Listen as we mourn the death of Joe Camel, have Crystal Dreams, and hang out with Jack Daniels and Jose Cuervo on this week's exciting episode!

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Michaela runs down the street screaming "I'm a vampire! I'm a vampire!" after getting a Vampire's Kiss (1988). Prepare for undiluted Nicholas Cage as a NYC literary agent who begins to suspect he's becoming a blood-drinking creature of the night following a one night stand with a sexy vampiress. Listen as we talk about live cockroach consumption, funny accents, recite our ABCs, and celebrate our 500th episode this week!

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Holly jams too much data into her wet-wired cranial hard drive with Johnny Mnemonic (1995), which finds our hero, played by Keanu Reeves, in the same life-threatening predicament. Only a plunge into the kaledescopic virtual rendering of cyberspace and the aid of a biologically enhanced dolphin can save him! Listen as we upload our downloads, get lo-fi with Lo-Teks and Tek Wars, burn chrome and go into full Mona Lisa Overdrive on this week's exciting episode!

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Sean sweats blood at the Death Spa (1989), one of the most 80's movies ever to grace screens, about a health club owner, haunted by the death of his wife, who finds the jealous missus may be reaching out from beyond the grave to kill customers at his swanky, fully automated fitness spa. Listen as we talk neon lights, pastel colors, wild fashions, angular architecture and exploding bodies on this week's exciting episode!

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Colin girds his loins against the emasculating razor attack of The Witch Who Came From the Sea (1976), about a woman who experienced sexual abuse as a child who castrates the men she fantasizes about on television. Listen as we talk about the storied career of co-star/casting director George "Buck" Flower, intestinal ailments and the treatment for them, and the need to shower immediately upon finishing this movie, all on this week's exciting episode!

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Michaela finds there's hell to pay with the final film that Cannon ever released, Hellbound (1994), starring Chuck Norris, the only man to play Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and win. Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he takes blood baths. Did you know Chuck Norris once destroyed the periodic table? Because the only element Chuck Norris needs is the element of surprise. All this and more Chuck Norris jokes on this week's episode!

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Sean files charges of lactose abuse against Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker (aka Night Warning, 1981), starring cult movie icon Susan Tyrell in a histrionic performance as a woman with an incestuous interest in her 17-year-old nephew, who may resort to murder to keep him close to home. Listen as we reel in shock and horror from multiple weaponized milk products, homophobic cops, logging truck decapitations, and plenty of psycho mama skeeviness on this week's exciting episode!

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Holly finds some of that Old Time Religion hunting down the God's Hand Killer in Frailty (2001), the directorial debut from actor Bill Paxton, a Southern Gothic horror-thriller about a single dad who receives a visit from an angel and trains his sons to slay demons on Earth. Listen as we talk religious fervor, killer children, supernatural visions, and an axe named 'Otis' on this week's exciting episode!

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Colin tries not to lose his head as he vows to claim The Prize with Highlander (1986). Immortal Christopher Lambert, born in the Scottish highlands, learns the ways of The Quickening from Sean Connery and struggles to reach the time of The Gathering in NYC when all these immortals will try to behead each other, because in the end There Can Be Only One. Listen as practice our swordplay, unravel the movie's filmic and TV legacy, and learn what a highlander is on this week's exciting episode!

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Michaela rings the death knell for the Cannon Films empire with Cyborg (1989), a cheaply made Jean-Claude Van Damme sci-fi martial arts action flick cobbled together from the remnants of the unrealized Spider-Man and Masters of the Universe 2, casting Van Damme as a post-apocalyptic warrior trying to rescue a cyborg woman from the evil bandits who murdered his True Love. Listen as we chart the rise of Van Damme, the fall of Cannon, the marvels of Baywatch Knights and more on this week's exciting episode!

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