Maureen loses it. Everyone’s invited.

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Boo hoo! Maureen has been attacked by a plant. She has had a week and has been encased in bubble wrap. That’s okay—Dan’s been absorbing the news for her while she grows a new eyeball. Or something.

There is actual good news! A union organizer successfully beat Amazon! Kicking Bezos in the balls is the SaysWhovian way! Meanwhile, another battle looms: the right wing has gone full-on against Disney. It’s Fox versus Mouse time, and things are getting weird.

There is so much Disney in this one. It’s all coming full circle.  Will Disneyland soon be free of red hatted-Republicans, driven away by their leaders and infotainers? Will Dan and Maureen be able to ride the Haunted Mansion 25 times in a row without fear of anti-maskers? And why is Dan talking about the 2024 elections so much? Why won’t he stop?

Get in line, SaysWhovia. Let’s ride Space Mountain.
 

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Maureen has returned from England, and she has tales to tell! She was in the woods! The fields! She saw a horse! She had tea! She has been around so much COVID! SO MUCH COVID. Meanwhile, Dan fought a tree and lost.

Because Maureen has been blissfully unaware of what the hell is going on, Dan has to break it to her. There has been news. It refuses to stop happening, the news. Everyone in the White House has COVID. There are strange doings in the January 6th investigation. Traitors and dirtbags abound. And there is a mysterious hole in the records of what Trump was up to on January 6th, 2021. A seven hour hole. IT’S THE NEW WATERGATE! Maureen has been ready for this her entire life!

Also, she has a terrible thing to tell everyone. She has a bucket. Dan makes it weird.

Get your burner phones, SaysWhovia. We’re meeting in the basement garage.

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Strap on your lifevests, it's time to take a ride! 

Maureen is back from her first trip and she has stories to tell, stories of signage and toilets and more signage and more toilets, and also a secret message left just for her. Dan is entranced. It has been a long time since he has been anywhere. This is like hearing from Shackleton.

Meanwhile, there is news about Disney. And morons. And yachts. All of this is important, but did you know that teenage Dan had a theremin?

These are weird times, but Dan and Maureen have got your back. In fact, they want to take you away on a confiscated yacht. So get on board. This time, we’re really doing it.

Toot toot!

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Maureen leads off with a story about why going out is to be avoided. Dan has burned off his beard. Once these topics are exhausted, there is some talk of the news. This feels like a real mistake, so Maureen ends up clinging to her day planners in an attempt to deal with everything.

Get your crafting supplies, SayWhovia. We’re journaling our way out of this timeline.

CONTENT NOTE: In this episode, we discuss the ongoing assault on LGBTQI+ lives in the USA. Of the former, we don’t go into details. It’s mostly us yelling about it. Oh, also earlier there's some dog blood and poop stuff

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We got you a snack.

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This week’s thing is a little spicier than normal. It’s just a bit of a possible war situation, is all.

But never fear! There are places you can go to find answers and relief, places like the newly-launched Truth Social—the new Trump social media platform that’s all the rage! Most of that rage is due to the fact that it doesn’t work, but still, what could go wrong? Also, if you can’t sleep, apparently the My Pillow guy is throwing pillows out of airplanes.

Okay. Maybe those aren’t good things for coping. So Dan and Maureen return to Says Who U. It’s all about crafting! Making! And Maureen’s flowers! And this jar she has on her desk! She will show you all the things, even though this is a podcast and you can’t see them!

Get your felt and glitter, SaysWhovia. We’re making puppets.

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Well, Dan and Maureen’s terrible game of “which one of us will have COVID in the house first” is over and Dan has won. 

Also, it is Maureen's birthday, something she neglected to mention when she sent the episode summary in.

So this week they’ve decided to skip most of the news, because their brains are gravy and there are better things to talk about—like taco walks, and going to the park, and that one time Maureen accidentally starred in a TV show. We’ll talk about the Before, The Now, and the Just Around the Corner. Things get upbeat!

It turns out that the trick is avoiding the news and really leaning into the tacos.

Get on this jet ski, SaysWhovia. We’re leaving.

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This is a downright old fashioned episode! It’s got Trump! It’s got Mike Pence! It’s got Rudy! It’s got Disney! It has balls! It has food! It’s got people in trucks doing weird things! It’s got shades of insurrection! Maureen tells pointless stories and Dan brings it all home with some weird Chicago shit.

And most importantly, it’s got MUSIC! So much music! So come on in and sing along!     

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Maureen is in a grouchy mood, what with the two years of pandemic and whatever. This doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a wonderful story to tell—a story of cake and parties and English people being extra English.

But Dan is the one who really has brought the goods. He has so many wonderful tales to tell! Tales of Trump and fax machines and Rudy knowing something! Tales of courts and trouble and that one time the rioters tried to hunt and kill Mike Pence for sport. This week is downright old fashioned! It’s like it’s 2018 all over again! Or 2019! Or maybe 1819! Or 1619! Whenever they used to hunt people in the street. It’s retro!

Somehow there’s a lot of talk of washi tape.

Forget it, Dan. It’s Grouchtown.

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