Shut up a Second

In which our heroes steal horses, rob carriages, stand and deliver and talk about bush rangers. We enjoy Australian's excuse for battle armour, want to take selfies with dead crooks and laugh at dumb past scientists for think Australia was a different shape to what it actually is. Gabe fills us in on the history of the Kelly gang, Jackson wants to know when we decided we weren't cool with corpses and special guests Liam and David from DCM Works both just want to look down on all of us dirty Victorians. So sit back and hand over all your valuables as we quit this podcasting nonsense and take up bush ranging.Want to get robbed? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month you can pretend you didn't donate that we robbed you like the outlaws we are.And don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/.

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In which our heroes cross their fingers, cross their toes and howl in agony when the sound of snapping bones reminds them that “crossing” isn’t really in toes’ wheelhouse as we discuss Digits. We reach a very quick consensus on extra thumbs, consider the drawbacks of nub justice and struggle with the concept of amphibious life. Edgoose dishes out some straight-up murder, Tessa repeatedly counts to eleven with potentially Satanic implications and Jackson just wants a concrete definition on pudding. So join the gang as they largely ignore toes to talk about fingers. Apologies if you wanted an hour on the joys of imperceptibly better balance and guidance when counting to numbers between 11 and 20. It’s done now and you don’t deserve better. Digits.Want to help us count to 10? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help us with basic math.And don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/ and grab some Sanspants Merch here http://teepublic.com/user/sanspantsradio.

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In which our heroes erroneously prepare for a big turnout, cut mammoth slices that nobody would sensibly request and are forced to follow a satisfying meal with gigantic slabs of sugar as we discuss cake. We push our pathetic plastic dessert forks into region-specific cooking literature, consider practical applications for cake and propose substitutes for sugar and flour. Jackson breaks into houses, Alli delivers a message to Mark Ruffalo/Buffalo and Zammit just tries to ruin all of your favourite foods. So join the gang as they attempt to refuse seconds, but, hindered by food-induced lethargy, end up with more cake. Never again.Want to help us make the perfect cake? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help us gain weight for the winter.And don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/, grab some Sanspants Merch here http://teepublic.com/user/sanspantsradio and vote for us in the Podcast Awards here http://www.podcastawards.com!

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In which our heroes are confronted with the unknown and the mysterious and do their best to solve the unsolved mysteries of the world. We pay too much for meat pies, get distracted by Jackson's fantastic dog and get stung by bees when we sleep in their hives. Zoe wants to turn the Hindenburg into a mystery, Adam gets mad when people don't understand bikes and Jackson just wants to keep you all posted about Dogwatch 2016. So sit back, put on your Sherlock Holmes hat and try to help us solve unsolved mysteries. Or at least cause some more.Want to help us understand the mysteries of fire? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month you can make a difference in our day to day lives.And don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/, grab some Sanspants Merch here http://teepublic.com/user/sanspantsradio and vote for us in the Podcast Awards here http://www.podcastawards.com!

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In which our heroes clean their aquarium, go down to the local fish n chip shop, buy too many dim sims and chat about all things fish. We discuss fish funerals, steal the superpowers we assume that sea creatures  have and inevitably create a wet apocalypse using nothing but the ocean and moth dust. Jackson idealises a whole new way of fishing, Leo shares a cautionary tale about shrimp and Duscher just ate stupid pills for breakfast. So join the gang as they cast a line, relax and stare into the empty void that is the ocean as it stares back and maybe, just maybe, fall in love.Want to help Pope Fish rebuild the Church of Fish? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month you can help convert those dirty fish heathens.Head to TeePublic to grab some sweet Sanspants Tees for only $14! And don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/

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In which our heroes shuffle the deck, criticize each-other’s deck-shuffling techniques and angrily reshuffle the deck as we discuss playing cards. We find ourselves underwhelmed by the nominally supernatural world of tarot, demand a greater level of sophistication from our magicians and express our disgust at anyone daring to assail us with mathematics. Jackson takes the opportunity to make his feelings known about kangaroos, Alli defends her knowledge of Alice in Wonderland and Zammit just wants the king to be sickeningly greasy. So join the gang as we offhandedly mention suit ranks and imply the existence of a game called 500 somewhere within a conversation about animals, nobility and bogus illusions. Playing cards. Want to help us make our own deck? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help us in this game of poker.Come see D&D is for Nerds Live Dungeon Crawl on the 28th of May, you can book tickets here: https://www.trybooking.com/LKBEAnd don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/

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In which our heroes select their murder methods, leave their calling cards and attempt to evade an ever-growing investigation as we discuss serial killers. We propose applications for disembodied arms, exploit the shortcomings of island law and examine the in-and-outs of running a successful murder hotel. Joel defends Charles Manson, Jackson fights the urge to needlessly declare his guilt, Zoe tries to describe an irregular bucket and Zammit just wants his cats to wait for the police. So join the gang as they publicly dissect their darkest instincts, causing irreparable damage to their social and legal standing, while acquainting themselves with serial killers.Want to help us cover up these murders? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help us avoid the chair.Come see D&D is for Nerds Live Dungeon Crawl on the 28th of May, you can book tickets here: https://www.trybooking.com/LKBEAnd don’t forget to purchase your copy of Plumbing the Death Star Vol. 1 right now available at https://audiobooksontape.com/shop/plumbing-death-star-bonus/

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In which our heroes look up the meanings of our name, change them all to better ones and immediately regret it as we discuss Alberts. We find weird fatty lumps on our bodies, discover how being an Albert would change our lives and turn Albert into an 80s cartoon style acronym. Jackson takes up wind-surfing to spite a village, TDB is forced to watch movies and Zammit just wants to find more animals designed to be eaten. So join the gang as they learn how to spell names. It’s a time. A time with someone called Albert.Want to help Jackson change his name Albert? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in his new identity.Would you like to help figure out how the human body clock may be related to depression? A study by Monash University is looking for otherwise healthy participants with depression, aged 18 to 30, to find out. You will be reimbursed for your time. If you would like more information, or to find out whether you’re eligible to take part, please send an email to [email protected]

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In which our heroes make a mess in the ocean, try to clean it all up and wonder how water gets so clean while discussing sponges. We have a guess about how many people tried to build the Ark before Noah, try to sell effective crime scene cleaning sponges on late night TV and hold the world ransom as we suck up the sea. Jackson furthers scientific knowledge by discovering a kraken, Alli makes a bet about flies and Zammit just wants to sponge up a giraffe. So join the gang as they marvel over what can only be described as the best argument for the existence of god; the humble sponge.Want to help Jackson establish a cult? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in the public’s acceptance that cousins is okay.Would you like to help figure out how the human body clock may be related to depression? A study by Monash University is looking for otherwise healthy participants with depression, aged 18 to 30, to find out. You will be reimbursed for your time. If you would like more information, or to find out whether you’re eligible to take part, please send an email to [email protected]

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In which our heroes move out to the woods to escape the hustle and bustle of a modern big city, overcome a mid-life career crisis and wonder what to do with all these logs as we discuss cabins. We make our own three bedroom cabins, dissect the motives of Robin Hood and attempt to do our best Brian Blessed inspired Tarzan calls. Jackson tries to understand old timey toys, Zammit learns to pronounce heirloom and Alli just wants endless fireplaces. So join the gang as they vaguely touch on the concept of cabins. It’s almost as nice as sitting by a wood log fire with a hot chocolate and a good book.  Want to help with our bathroom renovations? Head to http://www.patreon.com/sanspantsradio and for as little as $1 a month, you can help make a difference in Jackon’s dream cabin in the woods! Would you like to help figure out how the human body clock may be related to depression? A study by Monash University is looking for otherwise healthy participants with depression, aged 18 to 30, to find out. You will be reimbursed for your time. If you would like more information, or to find out whether you’re eligible to take part, please send an email to [email protected]

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