June 13 - Soberpod.com

Does it really need to be so fucking drama? Seriously. Have you ever tried just taking a step back and trying to evaluate if you really need to bring all that energy to the table, or if you do, why? It’s incredibly insane how much we elevate our feelings and emotions while we fly off the handle. The A.CA. (Adult Children of Alcoholics) Big Red Book refers to this behavior as “the inner drug store.” It reminds us that we can get a lot of the same feelings from inside ourselves that we used to get from outside ourselves with addictions in the past. So, pay attention to how you feel and how much you feel. This could signify that you are tapping into an internal “emotional drugstore” of addiction.

Reflections

Have you ever had an emotional hangover? Argued so much that you’re exhausted?

Daily Challenge

Identify which emotions really get you going. Write them down.

June 12 - Soberpod.com

When it comes to people - and sorry to be so cynical - don’t listen to what they say as much as you watch what they do. For years, some of us lied and manipulated others to get what we wanted. We said many things that allowed us to get high, be left alone, get laid, or get more money. One thing is for certain, some of us are more deceptive with our words than others, and some of us cause way more harm. It would be foolish to think others don’t try to deceive us. That is why we stay on guard by watching their actions and questioning their motives and intentions. We need to protect ourselves and potentially confront that person if needed. Remember, conflict can be a good thing if done right, and it just might help that person see their impact on others. Tread lightly here. Remember, if you want to hurt an addict's or alcoholic’s feelings (or just about anyone's), all you have to do is tell them the truth in a kind way.

Reflections

Is someone in your life saying one thing and then acting differently? Do their words not match their actions?

Daily Challenge

Go for a walk again. Trust me, it works.

Put this book away today.

Reflections

Am I doing too much?

Daily Challenge

Take a break.

June 10 - visit soberpod.com

You don’t have to do everything right now. Slow down, but not too slow. It would be best if you did something daily to achieve your goals. The question is, “How do you eat an elephant?” The answer is, “One bite at a time.” As addicts and alcoholics, we have a tendency towards instant gratification. We get an idea about playing guitar or returning to school, and we want it all right now! We want to be able to play guitar like a pro or get our diploma after the first day back to school. Instant fucking gratification! When this doesn’t happen, we get discouraged and give up. Thinking we have tried, we never try again. Everything takes time. You have to start somewhere, you won’t be a pro at whatever it is today, but you can work towards setting smaller goals today to achieve what you want later.

Reflections

Are you setting realistic, achievable goals?

Daily Challenge

Write down one thing you want to do in the next year. Now, what steps do you need to take to get there? Break the big goal down into smaller, manageable goals.

June 9 - visit soberpod.com

There are so many things we don’t say to the ones we love. We let the days go by and think we can always get to it tomorrow. Tomorrow rarely comes, and the next thing you know, we are grieving the death and loss of that loved one. Our thoughts flashback to “If only I would have said those things when I had the time.” If you’re in the program and needed to make amends, this can be harder still. Living in remorse and regret can take its toll on the soul. But there are things you can do to honor that person and make amends. Write letters to that person and perform a ritual of reading them out loud to your sponsor. Burn the letter. Put it in a bottle and throw it into the ocean. Visit their grave and bring flowers. Sit for a while graveside and talk. Whatever you do, make it meaningful. Do it without reserve, with love, and with wholehearted commitment.

Reflections

Do I need to say anything to those who are no longer here? Do I have amends to make to those who have passed? How can I honor them today?

Daily Challenge

Make a plan to honor your loved ones who have passed - actually write it down and pick a date.

Summary

This episode revolves around the topic of making amends in recovery. Carl shares a personal story about a past wrongdoing and the guilt and remorse he felt. He discusses the importance of making amends to honor loved ones who have passed and shares his own experience of visiting a grave and apologizing. The conversation highlights the power of facing shame and remorse in recovery and the healing that comes from making amends.

June 8 - soberpod.com

“The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.”

― Henry David Thoreau

Some of us just need permission to be ourselves. We need to know that it’s okay to show our true selves. Some of us will live all of our lives wearing someone else’s skin while we hide from showing who we really are. Also known as “a quiet desperation.” This act of hiding behind a mask and pretending in every area of our lives is painful. While we numb out and ingest anything to make us feel better (or not at all), we only cause more harm in that process. This only encourages us to hide more and suffer longer. It’s a compounding cyclical and silent desperation. For those needing permission to break down, give up, give in, surrender, let go, and just hurt out loud, consider this reading today your official permission.

Reflections

In what areas of your life do you look for permission? For what do you need permission from others to do, even though you really don’t need anyone’s permission?

Daily Challenge

If you need to cry, cry. You have permission.

June 7

When I share in A.A. meetings, I often joke about falling in love with the guy at 7-Eleven (convenience store). Why? Because I did. When I was using, I was miserable and angry all the time for seemingly just existing and having to wake up and breathe. After a few years of working towards being a better human, I embraced the principle of “brotherly love” and looked towards others with more empathy and compassion than I have ever had in my life up to that point. How did it happen? Listening to others. Taking advice and suggestions. Shuffle off this mortal coil. Discovering and appreciating the little things. Finding gratitude in the birds singing and not wishing them dead for waking me up. Bitterness can rot your soul, and what I began looking for and relying upon was hope.

Reflections

Check your attitude today. Does that person really deserve your venom? Where and what is your focus?

Daily Challenge

Instead of just going about your day all selfishly, why not stop and ask people how their day is going? For reals.

June 6

I don’t know when it happened, but it happened. The landscape of self-help and the Internet turned into a sea of personal fucking coaches and sobriety gurus. At every turn, another one pops up and shouts into the void, “Pick me! I can help you change your life!” And the problem is that some of us fall for this noise. Most of these coaches/gurus are charlatans skilled at taking your money and preying on your desire to get sober or improve your shortcomings. There is no shortcut to self-improvement. You can’t buy it from someone. You can’t give it to someone who needs or wants it. It takes personal dedication and perseverance each day to really improve your life. The people who get it are the people who do it. You know this to be true, and you feel this in your chest every time you try. And it’s hard. Don’t fall for the quick promise of easy sobriety, more money, or tighter abs. It all takes daily effort. And again, it’s hard.

Reflections

How many books or programs have you tried to improve your life? Which ones have actually made an impact?

Daily Challenge

Share your information with others. Let others know what bullshit is and what isn’t. Save someone’s life.