A lot of men direct all their anger toward the other guy — the affair partner — when they find out their wife cheated. I get it. It feels easier to hate the outsider than to face what your wife actually did. But at some point, we need to be honest about where the real responsibility lies.

In this episode, I respond to a man who wrote in saying he’s still furious at his wife’s affair partner, years after the infidelity ended. We talk about why misplaced anger keeps men stuck, why some “nice guys” absolve their wives of all wrongdoing, and what it really takes to let go and move forward.

We also get into his second question: why his wife, who cheated and moved out, still hasn’t followed through with the divorce. Spoiler — she doesn’t get to decide your future.

If you’ve ever struggled with letting go after betrayal, this one’s for you.
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