Aubrey is the man men want to be and the man women want to be with. Living on a compound with Aubrey would mean he would get all the women and own all the resources.

Today, Ryan and Aubrey talks about balance as a way to having it all — ever get tired of your ham sandwich? There isn't only one menu...

Key Takeaways

Habits or ideas? [1:53] what creates success? Aubrey explains that most of his success came from moments of furiously brilliant inspiration followed by long and often aimless recoveries. Structuring his habits was a way for him to achieve a more even keel.

Having it all [3:47] there is no need to choose, but you do have to dedicate yourself to being fully present: 30 minutes of fully invested time is worth more than 3 days of half interested presence.

Time and energy are the limiting factors — to be present and invested, you need the energy to spend the time.

[5:34] Balance (or counterbalance) is the key to a well rounded life, Aubrey details what that means for him.

The grind [9:43] Entrepreneurs often need to validate themselves externally, which leads to an inability to let go once you've reached a goal.

You need to get comfortable with yourself, become aware of the psychological traps that keep you grinding and finally: identify what you are essential for within your company, and build a team that lets you leave to better come back.

Sex and relationships [16:43] society has a lot of rigid ideas about what relationships are but Aubrey's sample group (athletes, CEO's, entrepreneurs,etc.) are all in monogamous relationships, cheating or wanting to cheat, becoming more and more resentful.

He shares a bit about his journey towards an open relationship and how it's helped his couple(s) see their true selves unencumbered by resentment.

Crumbling systems [23:03] governments, religions, society… Aubrey thinks humankind is going through a series of radical metaphysical shifts, beginning with the realisation of self which includes divinity, love and sovereignty over our own bodies and minds.

The crumbling of "parental" structures requires an increase in personal responsibility and structure.

Bad habits [26:37] are lost through knowledge, Aubrey moved towards a lot of good practices through gaining empirical knowledge and removing the intellectual wiggle room not to do them — cold showers are good, but you need every reason you can get to turn the hot water off!

Pain and discomfort [28:49] the ability to push through beneficial discomfort and to collapse your fear surrounding something may be the defining characteristic of really successful people.

Aubrey on wrestling tree cockroaches to collapse your fear into courage.

In a society of abundance, (beneficial) discomfort is a healthy way of getting the yin to your yang and creating growth.

Eat a weird lunch [36:45] Chapter 8 of Aubrey's book was the most difficult to write — being academic is a tough grind!

Who does Aubrey want to be when he grows up? [38:55] Don Miguel Ruiz, Ted Dekker, Don Howard Lawler.

Delayed braingasm [41:32] the layers of the onion of existence!

One layer is universal love (god)

One layer is consciousness (soul)

One layer is the physical body

The toothpick is the self, it always touches love, consciousness and the physical body.

You can choose to identify with any of those layers, or recognise that you are always in contact with all of those dimensions — and that the onion is entirely made of toothpicks!!

Thanks for listening!

Mentioned in this episode

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