Today, we're joined by Annie Kate Peterson, a graphic designer and author of the children's book "What She Sees: A Story Investigating Body Image." She shares about developing anorexia at age 10 during a perfect storm of family stress when her desire to be seen and loved felt like "asking for too much." Bodies are inherently chaotic—they change without our permission, they age, they go through puberty, they jiggle and shift and refuse to stay put. They are a lot like life itself: unpredictable, uncontrollable, constantly in flux. The way we treat or feel about our bodies often speaks to how we are navigating the bigger questions of life — including whether we deem ourselves fundamentally good and worthy of love. There’s a heartbreaking pattern that sets in when we don’t: we punish our bodies, the one thing that seems within our control.This pattern may be especially common in cultures that connect beauty with worth or deprivation with devotion. We dig into why Utah has the highest number of plastic surgeons per capita and growing up with the religious expectation that attracting and securing a spouse was part of fulfilling God’s plan. Annie traces a fascinating historical line from Renaissance beauty ideals celebrating fuller bodies to Protestant "fasting girls" who believed starvation brought them closer to God. That legacy, she argues, still haunts religious communities today, including the Latter-day Saints.

The irony is that this attempt to feel worthy of love works against itself. Annie shares how her recovery transformed not just her relationship with her body, but with everyone she loves. One breakthrough moment came through a letter from her little sister, who said: "I tried looking in the mirror at myself the way that you did, and it was painful. So I stopped." Her sister’s wisdom to walk away from the demon that had consumed Annie's life helped Annie see a different way she could treat herself — with gentleness. The isolation of an eating disorder, Annie explains, isn't just about food—it's about deserting yourself so completely that you can't connect with anyone else. Annie has gathered resources for anyone struggling with body image issues or eating disorders. You can access them here.

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