Would you describe yourself as a disciplined person? Did you know that there is joy in being disciplined? If that seems like an oxymoron—how could discipline be joyful?—hang with me and you’ll see want I mean. First, it might be good to define exactly what I mean by being disciplined. Here’s a good definition:

“Discipline is the ability to make yourself do something you don’t want to do in order to get a result you really want to get.”

That’s what I mean by discipline. I have to impose discipline on myself because it is not natural or easy for me. But I’ve lived long enough to know that without imposing discipline in my life, I’ll never get the results I want. However, even more importantly, I’ll never do all the good works God planned for me to do without being disciplined.

Here’s a discipline that makes a difference in your day-to-day responsibilities and in your spiritual welfare as well. And that is the discipline of getting up early enough each day to start your day right, to have time to read your Bible and pray about the day ahead, to get started without stress and chaos.

You know, your day is won or lost in the morning hours. Are you able to make yourself get out of that bed so that you can get the result you want for the day? Oh, I think I can hear someone saying, “But I’m not a morning person!” Okay—maybe it’s true that you are more of a night owl but here’s the thing: Your day begins early—at least for most of us—and if you don’t take advantage of those early hours, you’re missing a great opportunity to get a real jump on your day.

So, let me encourage you to impose this discipline of getting up early enough to begin your day right. The Psalmist put it this way:

“Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days” (Psalm 90:14).

Getting up early will help you sing for joy and be glad all day. Try it!

If you made a list of all your favorite words, would “discipline” be one of them? I rather doubt it; I don’t think it would make my list. To me, discipline is a chore, a major chore, and if I could find some way to get through life without it, accomplishing what I want to accomplish, believe me, I would try.

So why am I talking about discipline, and why would I title this series “The Joy of Discipline”? Because even though we don’t like the word and what it represents so much, the truth is: Discipline is necessary. It's necessary, that is, if you truly want to accomplish something worthwhile in your life and reach your objectives. It's necessary if you want to turn your dreams into accomplishments. It's necessary if you're not willing to settle for mediocrity or mundaneness.

And let me just make one point which is so very critical:

Lack of discipline is self-inflicted suffering!

Discipline is not fun—at least not all the time! But, if you refuse to impose discipline on yourself, you will inflict suffering on yourself. As someone has said, “We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”

So, choosing discipline over regrets makes for joy! There is joy in being a disciplined person.

Here are some verses from Proverbs that tell us the value of discipline:

"For this command is a lamp, this teaching is a light, and correction and instruction are the way to life" (Proverbs 6:23).

"Whoever disregards discipline comes to poverty and shame, but whoever heeds correction is honored" (Proverbs 13:18).

"Those who disregard discipline despise themselves, but the one who heeds correction gains understanding" (Proverbs 15:32).

Wise Solomon points out that discipline brings understanding and honor, avoids poverty and shame, and is the way to life. Imposing needed disciplines is guaranteed by God’s Word to make wonderful, joyful changes in your life.

Of course, that takes intentionality—you have to make it happen. I’m going to give you some easy, practical suggestions that may help you impose discipline where you need it. I will be sharing from my own struggles and failures and—believe it or not—successes. I am living proof that anyone can acquire discipline!

We’ve seen examples, in our Fran and Jesus story, of the problems that Fran had with setting reasonable boundaries in her life. And that led to lots of unnecessary stress, some false guilt, and enabling others to avoid doing what they were supposed to do. I have to admit that I have struggled with setting and keeping reasonable boundaries, how about you?

The challenge of setting boundaries is almost always a relationship issue. And it frequently comes from our misplaced idea of what it means to be a good friend, or what it means to be a good team player. There’s no doubt that as Christ-followers, our standard given to us by Jesus himself is to go the extra mile, to do more than is required of us. We are called to be servants, as Jesus was, and that should always be our attitude.

But when we try to do more than we should do and we think that going the extra mile means we jump through everyone’s hoops and meet everyone’s expectations, we are then in dangerous territory. This is how we become burned out; it’s how we become enablers; it’s how we allow false guilt to drive us into exhaustion and resentment.

I would remind you that Jesus knew how to say no. Do you remember when the disciples were looking for Jesus one morning because a crowd of people had gathered to hear Jesus again, and no doubt were eager to take advantage of his gift of healing? They found him alone, praying, and they exclaimed: “Everyone is looking for you!” Jesus replied, “Let us go somewhere else—to the nearby villages—so I can preach there also. That is why I have come.” The disciples tried to tell Jesus that he should come back and preach to the crowd waiting for him, but Jesus knew when to say no. You’ll find that story in Mark 1.

Another time a man stopped him and said, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” But Jesus said to him, “Man, who made me a judge or arbitrator over you?” Basically Jesus said, “Sorry, that’s not my job.” He drew a boundary and said no, even though he could have done it but it was not what he was sent to do. You’ll find that story in Luke 12.

Jesus knew that he could not please everyone; in his human body while here on earth he had physical limitations, as we do. He became weary, as we do. He needed rest and time alone, as we do. And in order to do what God had sent him to do, he had to refuse to do other things—he had to draw boundaries. I believe his example teaches us that we must also learn to draw reasonable boundaries in order for us to be able to do what God wants us to do.

Do you ever feel like you’re hanging on by your shoestrings? That’s where our friend, Fran is in this latest episode of Fran and Jesus on the Job, because she is having a hard time setting some reasonable boundaries with friends and coworkers, and even with her boss.

Finally, it’s Friday and Fran is running on fumes. “Thank God it’s Friday,” she says to herself. “I can take it easy this weekend.” Then, at about 3:00 she sees a text from her Pastor asking that she help with a special event at church tomorrow. He writes,

Fran, I know this is a late request, but Courtney is very sick, so she’s not able to do the registration for our equipping class tomorrow. I need someone who can handle the registration process calmly and efficiently. That, of course, is you. I’m sure hoping and praying you can do it. Let me know as soon as possible. Thanks, Pastor Paul.

“Well,” Fran says to herself, “how do you say no to that? It’s certainly not Pastor’s fault that this request is so late—and it is church work, after all, so I just think I have to buck up and do it.” And so she sends a response that assures Pastor Paul she’ll be there.

Now she has to break the news to her kids and disappoint them, work late on Friday to get her Saturday chores done, and try to get a few hours sleep before heading off to church. What a week! Have you found yourself in some similar tough weeks far too often? Maybe, like Fran, you need to take a look at your need for setting some reasonable boundaries.

For Fran, her problem is a combination of trying to please everyone, enjoying the recognition she gets from being the go-to person, and feeling guilty when she has to say no. Yes, there will be times when we have to go the extra mile, but a continual habit of crossing needed boundaries will lead to burnout.

If you have trouble holding to reasonable boundaries, and you know it, perhaps you’ll consider what causes you to do that, ask God for wisdom, and then pray for his strength to stick to your boundaries. It really is the best way to live out your faith.

We’re continuing the story of Fran and Jesus on the Job. Fran is having a tough week because she is having difficulty setting boundaries. It’s Wednesday and she has just barely made a deadline for her most important client, but it was at the expense of late hours last night because she allowed a coworker to talk her into helping her for “ten minutes,” which turned into three hours. And now she is exhausted and sleepy, and she’s counting the minutes until it’s time to go home. Then in comes her manager.

“Fran, if you’re not busy tonight, I’d love for you to join me for dinner with the Vice President of Marketing, who is in town this week, you know. I’ve been telling him about your success and how much you’ve contributed to our success, and he asked if you would join us. Can you?”

Don’t do it, Fran, the inner voice of God’s Spirit seems to say to her, but how can she say no to this opportunity. So she hears herself saying, “That’s very nice of him. I, uh, I think I can make that happen. Let me make a call and I’ll get back to you.”

She calls her mom and asks if she can bring the kids over tonight for a short time. Then, when she gets home and explains to the kids that she has to go out to dinner with her boss, Drew complains, “But Mom, we agreed that you would help me with my science project tonight. You promised.”

Oops, that’s right. Now she needs to talk her parents into coming over to their house so her Dad can help Drew with his science project. It’s not convenient for them, but like Fran, they have trouble saying no, so they agree.

Well, the dinner with the Vice President wasn’t as productive as Fran had imagined. After a few drinks, he told some inappropriate stories, made some remarks that verged on sexual overtures, and it became a pretty uncomfortable situation. Fran used the excuse of getting home to her kids to exit the dinner as early as possible, but it was still after ten o’clock by the time she got home. With apologies to her parents, she tried to clean up some of the mess from the science project, get her house in decent condition, and fall into bed at midnight.

Refusing to set boundaries has consequences for yourself and for other people in your life.

Do you know when and how to set reasonable boundaries? Fran is facing some boundary issues. She has a little trouble distinguishing between what it means to go the extra mile and becoming an enabler.

It’s Tuesday and Fran has a plate full of things to get done for one of her most important clients before a deadline on Wednesday. As she digs in, a coworker walks into her office. “Hey, Fran, how’s it going?” It’s Amy, a nice gal who is a project manager like Fran, but who somehow always seems to need help from others—especially Fran! “Hi, Amy. Well, it’s going good, but I’m under the gun to meet a deadline by tomorrow. How are things going for you?”

Uh-oh, Fran thinks, that was not the best question to ask. So, Amy begins to slowly talk about a presentation she is preparing for a new prospect tomorrow, but she is stumped. “Fran, I know you’re busy, but you’re so smart and so fast, if you could just look over my presentation and give me your opinion, I would be so grateful. It won’t take you ten minutes. How about it?”

The voice in her head says, “Don’t go there, Fran. This is a time to say no.” But her exaggerated idea of what it means to “go the extra mile” overcomes her better sense, and she agrees that she can give Amy ten minutes.

What happens? Ten minutes turns into three hours, where basically Fran completely redesigns her presentation, and Amy is thrilled. “Sorry it took so long, Fran, but I know you’ll do a great job on your project. Thanks so much,” and off she goes. Now Fran has to take her work home, take time away from her family and her sleep in order to meet her own deadline.

Fran has trouble saying no. You see, Fran is a go-to person, so she likes to play the role of superwoman and she truly wants to help others. But she needs to learn where to set boundaries so she doesn’t become an enabler at times without realizing it. Fran should have listened to that quiet voice which told her to say no, but she just finds that so hard to do.

How do you come to the place where you know when to say no, when to go the extra mile, and when to draw the line in the sand and stick to your boundaries? There are no hard and fast rules here, but one thing to consider is whether or not you are becoming an enabler by refusing to say no.

Well, boundary-setting is challenging for Fran, but her attempts at being superwoman will not benefit her or her friends. So, she needs to address this issue in her life. Maybe you do as well.

Do you have difficulty setting reasonable boundaries in your life? In this episode of Fran and Jesus on the Job, Fran faces various people in her life who are pushing her boundaries. The first one deals with a friend, Jane, who continually exceeds acceptable boundaries in her demands on Fran’s time. Jane calls Fran quite often and talks for long periods of time about all her issues. You might say she is a high-maintenance friend, but Fran has tried to listen and help her, thinking that this is the right thing to do.

It’s Sunday afternoon and Fran has planned to spend a quiet day at home with her two children, just playing games with them and having fun. In the midst of a game the phone rings and Jane is on the other end.

As Fran sees Jane’s caller ID, she is really tempted to just let it go—but she’s supposed to be there for her friends, right? So, she answers and sure enough Jane begins her typical long and detailed complaining and whining.

At first, Fran tries to encourage her and offer some suggestions, but everything she says is resisted by Jane, and it seems Fran can do nothing but listen. After twenty minutes, Drew says, “Mom, aren’t we gonna finish our game?” No doubt Jane heard Drew, but she completely ignores it and continues her tirade. After another ten minutes and several pleas from Drew and Alice, Fran realizes that Jane is not going to stop anytime soon, so Fran says, “Hey, Jane, the kids and I were playing a game and I promised them we’d finish, so if you don’t mind, I need to get back to them. I’ll be praying for you. In fact, why don’t I pray for you now before we hang up?”

Jane says, “Well, I know you’re always busy and don’t have time to talk—I guess games are more important to you than friends.” And with that she hangs up, ignoring Fran’s offer to pray.

“Wow,” Fran says to herself, “I guess I should have let her keep talking—but honestly, it doesn’t do any good to listen to her. I don’t know, Lord, what am I supposed to do?” And then the false guilt starts to set in. Fran needs to take that hard step of setting some boundaries, for her sake as well as Jane’s.

Have you got some “Janes” in your life—people who continually bend your ear and take up your time, but nothing good ever seems to come from it? Maybe it’s time to set some boundaries. You see, setting boundaries is often very uncomfortable and false guilt is one of our enemies.

Presented by Lisa Bishop

There are so many areas of our lives that require courage. From changing jobs to admitting when you make a mistake, taking a risk and trying something new, staying in a friendship when it gets hard, making amends with a co-worker, or apologizing to a spouse. There is no end to the list of things and circumstances that require us to muster up courage. Courage is said to be the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty. Another way I have heard courage defined that has a bit more depth to it is this:

“Courage is the ability to face and overcome fear while prioritizing a greater objective. It is not the absence of fear but rather the determination to act despite its presence, guided by a strong sense of purpose and a commitment to achieving a higher good.”

I love this definition because it goes beyond just persevering through fear. I hear hope in it. You aren’t just mustering up the determination to push through something that causes anxiety and distress just for the sake of it; you have a greater intention and mission. You are committed to conjuring up courage because there is a greater motive, something much bigger at stake.

Several weeks ago, I watched a movie, Luther: The Fallen Sun. My friend picked it and I had no clue what the movie was about before we started watching it (otherwise I may have declined). The movie is about former Detective Chief Inspector John Luther’s pursuit of a serial killer, David Robey. David, the villain in the movie, uses in-home technology to surveil and then blackmail his victims. Somehow, he finds a way to secretly spy on what appears to be everyday ordinary people, invading their privacy. He has, unbeknownst to them, infiltrated their lives giving him a window into their deepest darkest secrets, which in the cruelest of ways he ends up using against them. He essentially capitalizes on their shame for their immoral acts. The movie is not explicit about what those acts are—they are left to the viewer's imagination. But as I watched the diversity of those victimized by the leverage the serial killer had on them for knowing their dirt, one could surmise the misgivings committed most likely ranged from what may be considered small to greater transgressions that ended in disgrace.

You may be wondering, “What does this have to do with the connection between courage and confession?” I am glad you asked. The answer is summed up in one line in the movie. When Detective Luther is asked how the serial killer is able to commit such heinous crimes and manipulate people to take their own lives, Luther responds, “He’s probably figured out that in the right circumstances, the fear of shame, the fear of being called out, the fear of being caught is way more powerful than the fear of death.”

Now this statement may sound like an extreme example, but the truth is, the feeling of shame that is induced by the fear of our sin being exposed can destroy and torment us.

We have all experienced the weight of shame at some point in our lives. Shame is defined as, “a painful emotion caused by the awareness of having done something wrong, dishonorable or foolish.”

David Robey was the villain in the movie that caused people to be so entrenched in shame that they saw no way out, leading them to hide in isolation which was his ultimate form of manipulation. Their shame had so overcome them, that they would rather die than be exposed. Satan is your enemy, the villain in your life, and he will make every attempt to hold you hostage and in bondage to the things that you are ashamed of. The Bible says in 1 Peter 5:8-9:

“Stay alert! (other versions say be vigilant, watchful, sober-minded; meaning free from intoxicating influences). Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion,

(Presented by Lisa Bishop)

Do you ever find your confidence in God wavering when life catches you off guard or things just don’t seem to make sense sometimes?

We all face times throughout our lives when trusting in God is hard. We can be tempted to wonder if God really cares about us when the circumstances we are facing are perplexing. Whether it’s a sudden loss of a job, a friend who turns their back on us, or a relationship that seemed promising goes sideways, the truth is life’s twists and turns can be confusing and they can cause you to doubt God’s faithfulness.

You can be tempted to fear that God has forgotten you and doubt that his plans for you are good. That’s when your courage to trust God needs to kick in. That may sound funny: courage to trust God? Courage has often been described as the determination to act despite the presence of fear. When I think about that definition of courage as it relates to faith, it goes something like this, “In spite of my current circumstance, I will not give in to fear. I will be determined to believe God is for me and live in such a way that shows I trust him.”

Sometimes you need to remind yourself that even when you cannot see it, God is always working in your best interest and on your behalf because he loves you.

When it comes to the courage to trust God I am reminded of Job. In the story of Job we learn that he was "blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil" (Job 1:1). He had ten children and was a man of great wealth. One day Satan accused him of honoring God only because God had blessed him. So, God allowed Satan to take away Job’s wealth, his children, and his health, leading Job to utter devastation and loss.

Stunningly we read that Job grieved deeply but did not accuse God of any wrongdoing (Job 1:22; 42:7-8). The life of Job demonstrates that we are often unaware of the many ways God is at work in the life of every believer. Job, even during his suffering and crying out to God, knew that God was in total control. Though he had no way of knowing why so many terrible tragedies were occurring in his life, Job never lost his faith in God, even under the most heartbreaking circumstances that tested him to his core, he demonstrated determination, courage, and trust, despite his circumstances. It’s hard to imagine losing everything we own in one day—property, possessions, and even children and not wavering in understanding that God is still in control.

What difficult and perhaps confusing circumstances are you currently facing? How will you choose to demonstrate the courage to trust God? Proverbs 16:20b says, “Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord.”

Put your confidence, hope, and security in Jesus. He will come through.

(Presented by Lisa Bishop)

Being a part of a healthy body of believers is essential to your spiritual growth. And when I say healthy, I do not mean perfect. One thing that can tempt you to withdraw from Christian fellowship is imperfect people. Well, we are all imperfect. You are imperfect; I am imperfect. Lord knows we are all in the process of being transformed as 2 Corinthians 3 tells us: “And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Being more and more transformed into the image of Jesus is a lifelong process. We are all works in progress. People will disappoint you and cause hurt and you will do the same, because we are all human as we strive to live in the new self that we are created for, in Christ.

And here’s the deal. God designed you for connection, you are created for community. You cannot grow in isolation. You need friends and mentors; you need companions along the journey. Being in community takes courage because relationships, deep and intimate relationships, call us to demonstrate transparency and authenticity. They require going below the surface and opening the door to vulnerability. Sharing our deepest joys, dreams, and desires and exposing our insecurities, disappointments and even our sin.

Finding genuine community will take time, so resist getting discouraged and throwing in the towel too soon. Developing enduring connection will require you to be patient as relationships form, to keep showing up and leaning in.

As you seek to build relationships, the thing to ask yourself is, “Are you the friend you’re looking for?” In other words, you can’t expect things from friendships and community that you aren’t willing to give and be yourself. If you want to be with people who are generous, selfless, kind, loving, trustworthy, reliable, or loyal, do you embody those same qualities? Sometimes we have high expectations of others when we aren’t willing to raise the bar on ourselves. And don’t wait for people to reach out to you. Make the first move! Invite someone to grab coffee or lunch. Ask them to meet up at church and sit together. It can be tempting to wait until someone seeks you out and initiates getting to know you but if everyone takes that posture…well, you get the point.

I know being in community takes courage. Maybe you have been hurt in the past. Perhaps you consider yourself to be shy and stepping out is hard. I get it. If you are not participating in Sunday worship services weekly, that is your first step. If you have been attending (and that does not mean watching online), find a way to serve; get in a small group, and look for ways to connect. Show up, contribute, participate, and pray. Have patience and ask God to bring some solid believers into your life and see how God provides. You were made for community.