The Conditional Release Program

The Two Jacks discuss the strategic defence review written by former Labor defence Minister Stephen Smith and former ADF head Angus Houston. The review shows Australia's military preparedness in the increasingly hot zone of the Indo-Pacific.

The Defence Dept has dropped the ball on technology and comms disruption and the easy quotes from the media about Australia entering the missile age means Australia should possess long range and ICBMs but there is no mention of it in the review.

In the US, Biden announces his run for the presidency in 2024 and in France, Macron has banned the banging of pots and pans.

In sport, the Wallabies drop the green and gold for the colour blind while the ANZAC day clash between Essendon and Collingwood has the Jacks drooling. 

This week we are being lazy and letting the robots do the work. But hold on - is it that simple? Can you just get ChatGPT to write up and episode.

Well, yes and no.

You can. But to make it say what you want it to say it's a slog. It's good, but it's not great. Real estate copy? Sure. A genuinely interesting and funny podcast? It seems like our jobs are safe.

But the robot had a good crack at it. And while we are sitting pretty in the face of an AI great replacement - what this dopey machine comes up with is kinda funny. Kinda.

The script is entirely ChatGPT. We filled in a few blanks for fun, but you can tell what's us and what's script. Just enjoy how ridiculous the future is and remember THE ROBOT LIES ALL THE TIME!

Enjoy!

TO CLARIFY - When Joel and Jack are talking about 'white hats' in Syria, they were the 'white helmets' - a group of volunteers who put their lives in harms way to rescue people from rubble and other dangerous situations that resulted in several casualties but a lot of saved lives. They exist. The white hats that Bosi talks about do not.

SECOND CLARIFICATION - (Joel here) I said that the reason we weren't in the ChatGPT training is because we were outside of the robot's training range. We were indeed inside the robot's training range, I just forgot that we have been doing this damn podcast for years now.

In shame, I edited it. But in truth Catholic fashion I believe one should be horribly punished for their mistakes so I am putting this in the show notes so everyone know's that I'm an idiot. Chookers! Thanks to Lloyd for pointing that one out to me!

Here's a preview of this weeks premium epiosde. From as little as five bucks a month! Don't make me get all weird and shame you like Dave Oneegs does - if you can't afford it, you just need to like want it more. Winners grindset bro.

If any of you are missing out because you're actually broke drop me a line and I'll send you a file. It's the honour system so don't tell me fibs!

Enjoy the free snippet!

The Conditional Release Program on Patreon

Hello good Patrons and thank you for your continuing support of the show. For your pennies this week you get a bit of an extension of our ChatGPT episode where we discuss a few of the responses we got and the nudges needed to get it to say crazy shit. 

And later in the episode we look at former crackhead and current idiot Mike Lindell who put out a $5million challenge to prove him wrong on election data and someone did it. Quite easily apparently. Unsurprisingly, Mike Lindell never intended to pay and is taking it to court. That's why you can't take these dickheads seriously. 

The Two Jacks discuss the state of legal issues around reproductive health for women in the US where abortion is banned for 43 percent of American women of reproductive age.

The situation is getting worse not better after the US Supreme Court revoked Roe V Wade with outrageous laws in some states. When will it end? Not for decades according to JTI, if at all.

In local news Albo gets a tick from Time Magazine while the Two Jacks discuss the latest politicking around the Voice.

In Florida, Ron DeSantis wants to build a prison next to Disneyworld. Or maybe he's joking. While in sport, Arsenal get a bad case of the jitters as Man City hunt them down for the title. 

Here's a preview of this weeks premium epiosde. From as little as five bucks a month! Don't make me get all weird and shame you like Dave Oneegs does - if you can't afford it, you just need to like want it more. Winners grindset bro.

If any of you are missing out because you're actually broke drop me a line and I'll send you a file. It's the honour system so don't tell me fibs!

Enjoy the free snippet!

The Conditional Release Program on Patreon

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It's been a little bit quiet at the TCRP stables as Joel takes a sabbatical after easter to prevent total burnout but regular programming will resume - we have a some plans in the pipeline including a fairly silly episode written by ChatGPT showing how utterly replaceable we are and Jack has a very interesting true crime interview lined up. A bit of an exclusive.

This week we look at the liberal party and their position on the voice. Dutton has decided to go with the no vote and it's already tearing his party apart. Top work constable. Real good work champ. Looks like the libs will need to get used to opposition for a while...

Trump is in trouble - all the way up his crusty butthole. See, in a main episode I would have edited out the rambling about Trump's anus but Patrons get the good shit. He is in trouble. Lots of it. And nobody cares about Eric. Still.

Finally we look at the right wing tantrum around the Bud Light x Dylan Mulvaney promotion which saw Dylan's face on a can of Bud Light to celebrate a year of transition. The actual ad itself is pretty cute but she has made right wing nut jobs lose their minds. Why? Dumb reasons. Really dumb reasons.

Enjoy~!

The Two Jacks discuss the Voice and the Federal Liberals' stated position of a No vote in the referendum.

JTI takes a look at all of the Liberals around the country, including some in the federal parliament who have stated they will promote the Yes vote. Will the referendum tear the Libs apart and what will a No position mean to their long term political life?

In the US, an unpopular Joe Biden still looks to be the likely winner in the 2024 presidential election.

A political scandal rocks the Scottish National Party amid questions of why Nicola Sturgeon retired from politics.

Putin's long table is explained by a high level Kremlin defector who claims the Russian president is a gibbering paranoid who fears Covid.

In sport, a US meteorological study with Major League Baseball shows climate change means more zingers. 

Welcome to another edition of Tinfoil Tales News and Views!

This episode, SOS and Sandee discuss the fallout of the NSW election with Guru and Bosi making the case it was stolen, Trump style! Speaking of Trump... Trump flags cause division in the Melbourne freedom movement with a hilarious outcome.

An ABC segment was aired recently that created a stir when Darren Bergwerf was outed as antisemitic and SOS and Sandee explain their role in that story, and the reactions to it.

A freedom fighter makes a somewhat useless but still very cool voyage across the Pacific and our favourite character of the movement makes a return prompting SOS and Sandee to hilariously describe what their version of the New World Order will be when they win.

You can follow SOS and Sandee on twitter at:

sandee (@sunnysandeel) / Twitter

and

SOS (@SOS149) / Twitter

Link to ABC730 segment:

https://twitter.com/abc730/status/1642824724605554688?s=20

ABC article on My Place:

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-04-04/anti-vax-group-my-place-plan-to-influence-your-local-council/102166182

The 45th POTUS has been indicted and at face value, the prosecution looks if not weak, then offers only the prospect of conviction on a mild range of small-time offences a long way down the road. But how will it affect Trump's chances in the GOP Primaries?

The early polling indicates a big bounce for the Donald in the head to head against Florida Governor, Ron De Santis with other candidates barely making a mark. Is this what the Democrats want, Trump through the primaries and into a contest with Biden in the presidential election which the Dems think they can win?

In local news, HK Jack becomes a Level 4 Necromancer on the pundit scale after having tipped a Labor win in the Aston by-election. He gives his reasons. What does the Liberal party need to do to arrest its decline with voters? JTI argues the lessons of history around Labor's unelectability in Victoria in the 1960s and 70s should be learned. How they were addressed often painfully to Labor then offer the Libs some hope now provided they are prepared to act.

In sport, generosity of spirit in country footy makes news while Collingwood and the Broncos get out of the blocks best in their respective comps. 

The thing about covid is that it's not even real. Well, until you get it. Then it's an LRAD. Or a space laser. Or 5g.

We can sit back and laugh at the circus from afar but John had to deal with this shit on a day to day basis.

John works at a major hospital in Melbourne. He's a surgery tech and he's been yelled at going to work and he's been yelled at by a freedom movement proponent who later went on to abuse him and his coworkers after saving his life. Charming stuff.

John tells us what an absolute pain in the arse it is to operate on unvaccinated people and what it's like to see someone die from covid and then walk past a bunch of unwashed idiots telling you it's not a thing.

Sensational interview with Jack and John this week. Both not their real names, but the story is worth a listen.

Enjoy.

Trump is indicted! Or indicated? Either way, he's in trouble. He's handing himself over and hoping the whole thing will be a good little earner. 

The Aston by election goes to Labor. Not many saw it coming. Hong Kong Jack did, but he also thinks a lot of things...

But you gotta pay that - it was long odds! In the aftermath the Liberals are looking inward. And seeing cookers. And extremists. And idiots. 

Time for a purge?

We finish with an update on our True Crime episode where we looked at the way in which podcasts and internet personalities handled the Idaho State murders and the Murdaugh trial. Pretty badly. 

Well, it turns out these internet detectives have stitched up several people as being involved in the Idaho murders. Why? Because they're creeps. 

Not all true crime podcasts are shit though. Australian True Crime with Emily Webb is worth a listen - and Sandee and SOS were on it recently! 

It's been a little time since the last premium episode but we love you guys for hanging in there and supporting the show :-)