The Cracked Podcast

On this inaugural episode of the Cracked Gets Personal, Brandon Johnson and Robert Evans look into the world of emergency medicine. This podcast features stories from two doctors, an ER nurse, and a physician's assistant. They've got insane tales of butt-based disasters, alligator hunts gone wrong and the dumbest patients they've ever encountered. They also try to help us answer humankind's most pressing question: which gender is more likely to accidentally lose foreign objects inside themselves?

Episode two of Cracked Gets Personal is available now on its own feed, and new episodes will be released every Wednesday. Search for "Cracked Gets Personal" on your podcast app of choice or click here to subscribe on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/cj7V5h

For years, Cracked's Personal Experience section has been home to some of the highest-performing articles on our site. We've interviewed doctors, former cult members, and basically every kind of prostitute imaginable.

Despite the success of these articles, there's been one thing we can't translate adapting our hard-hitting interviews into text on a screen: our subjects' voices. So, for the last year we've been secretly taping conversations to create a podcast version of our 10 favorite Personal Experience subjects, and that season 1 of that podcast is premiering this Wednesday as Cracked Gets Personal.

And this week on the show, Alex Schmidt is welcoming Cracked Gets Personal's hosts, Robert Evans and Brandon Johnson, for a discussion of how this mini-series came together, how the Personal Experience articles get written and how CGP deftly tackles the subjects of police brutality, the opiod epidemic and butts...lots of things getting stuck up lots of butts.

To catch the first two episodes of Cracked Gets Personal on Wednesday, August 16th search for it in your podcast app of choice or click here to subscribe on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/cj7V5h

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your 3-day pass, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

Footnotes:

Robert and Brandon on Harmontown: https://goo.gl/ffpHH3

City Museum: https://goo.gl/YVBMfy

Article: Cracked: 6 Realities Of Life When You're Raped By A Celebrity: https://goo.gl/XwVgMA

Article: Cracked: 7 Things You Learn Surviving an Atomic Blast: https://goo.gl/OytRes

Article: Cracked: 5 Ugly Things You Learn as a Sex Slave in the Modern World: https://goo.gl/pNoyuU

Article: Cracked: 5 Things Your Doctor Really Wants To Say About You (But Wont): https://goo.gl/k4Vwny

Article: Cracked: 5 Horrifying Things Only Garbagemen Know About Your Town: https://goo.gl/xGNhMQ

Article: Cracked: 7 Things Former Slaves of ISIS Want You To Know: https://goo.gl/ZVTwDM

For years, Cracked's Personal Experience section has been home to some of the highest-performing articles on our site. We've interviewed doctors, former cult members, and basically every kind of prostitute imaginable.

Despite the success of these articles, there's been one thing we can't translate adapting our hard-hitting interviews into text on a screen: our subjects' voices. So, for the last year we've been secretly taping conversations to create a podcast version of our 10 favorite Personal Experience subjects, and that season 1 of that podcast is premiering this Wednesday as Cracked Gets Personal.

And this week on the show, Alex Schmidt is welcoming Cracked Gets Personal's hosts, Robert Evans and Brandon Johnson, for a discussion of how this mini-series came together, how the Personal Experience articles get written and how CGP deftly tackles the subjects of police brutality, the opiod epidemic and butts...lots of things getting stuck up lots of butts.

To catch the first two episodes of Cracked Gets Personal on Wednesday, August 16th search for it in your podcast app of choice or click here to subscribe on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/cj7V5h

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your 3-day pass, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

Footnotes:

Robert and Brandon on Harmontown: https://goo.gl/ffpHH3

City Museum: https://goo.gl/YVBMfy

Article: Cracked: 6 Realities Of Life When You're Raped By A Celebrity: https://goo.gl/XwVgMA

Article: Cracked: 7 Things You Learn Surviving an Atomic Blast: https://goo.gl/OytRes

Article: Cracked: 5 Ugly Things You Learn as a Sex Slave in the Modern World: https://goo.gl/pNoyuU

Article: Cracked: 5 Things Your Doctor Really Wants To Say About You (But Wont): https://goo.gl/k4Vwny

Article: Cracked: 5 Horrifying Things Only Garbagemen Know About Your Town: https://goo.gl/xGNhMQ

Article: Cracked: 7 Things Former Slaves of ISIS Want You To Know: https://goo.gl/ZVTwDM

Do you know what you want to do with the rest of your life? Well the good news is nobody really knows. You’re not alone! The bad news is you were supposed to know by age 13 or so. And if you didn’t know back then, society’s been watching you flail around ever since. We’re a nation of human beings, facing more change and “economic anxiety” than ever before. And if you look close enough, you’ll realize the answer to that problem has a lot less to do with border walls and coal jobs, and a lot more to do with welcoming immigrants, encouraging adaptability, and rethinking our entire educational system.

On this week’s podcast, Alex Schmidt is joined by Jason Pargin (aka David Wong) and Kristi Harrison, to point out our ongoing national crisis of mis-preparation derailing the lives of America’s teenagers, middle-aged parents, and everybody in between.

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

West Coast! Pack an extra life, some elixirs and a poke ball. The next live Cracked Podcast is Saturday, August 12th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Alex Schmidt asks Michael Swaim, Adam Ganser, Monika Scott, Mike Drucker and Christian Ramirez, "what is the best video game universe to live in?" Tickets are $7 and available here: https://goo.gl/WCKg8f

*Extremely Michael Caine Voice* Master Wayne, now that it's August, it's Christopher Nolan month on Cracked Movie Club. Join hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson for crazy behind-the-scenes stories, philosophical fan-theories and jokes - lots of stupid jokes - about Christopher Nolan's filmography, starting with The Prestige: https://goo.gl/saER6v

To hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

And if you were really hurting for more Cracked podcasts, we have great news for you. We're proud to announce our newest podcast venture, Cracked Gets Personal. In this 10-part miniseries, Cracked's Robert Evans and Rick and Morty's Brandon Johnson are adapting some of Cracked's most popular Personal Experience articles into an audio-documentary. Hear what it's like to live a day as a heroin addict, a garbageman, and rural ER doctor. The first two episodes premiere on Wednesday, August 16th and you can subscribe now by searching for Cracked Gets Personal on your podcast app of choice or clicking here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/Q1bFap

FOOTNOTES

Article: Cracked: 6 Facts That Will Clear Up Your Confusing Life: https://goo.gl/vL8M9f

Article: Cracked: 5 Reasons You Hated School (That You Were Right About): https://goo.gl/PSH13C

Book: Tony Wagner & Ted Dintersmith: Most Likely to Succeed: Preparing Our Kids for the Innovation Era: https://goo.gl/LXNPZN

Video: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO): Coal: https://goo.gl/f75xiG

Article: Washington Post: If Trump restricts skilled immigrants, the U.S. could lose jobs to other countries: https://goo.gl/kWJWmp

Article: New York Times: Rural Areas Brace for a Shortage of Doctors Due to Visa Policy: https://goo.gl/7UHTja

Article: Washington Post: U.S. faces 90,000 doctor shortage by 2025, medical school association warns: https://goo.gl/6pKpbB

Article: Fortune: Technology will replace 80% of what doctors do: https://goo.gl/2yP1eY

Do you know what you want to do with the rest of your life? Well the good news is nobody really knows. You’re not alone! The bad news is you were supposed to know by age 13 or so. And if you didn’t know back then, society’s been watching you flail around ever since. We’re a nation of human beings, facing more change and “economic anxiety” than ever before. And if you look close enough, you’ll realize the answer to that problem has a lot less to do with border walls and coal jobs, and a lot more to do with welcoming immigrants, encouraging adaptability, and rethinking our entire educational system.

On this week’s podcast, Alex Schmidt is joined by Jason Pargin (aka David Wong) and Kristi Harrison, to point out our ongoing national crisis of mis-preparation derailing the lives of America’s teenagers, middle-aged parents, and everybody in between.

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

West Coast! Pack an extra life, some elixirs and a poke ball. The next live Cracked Podcast is Saturday, August 12th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Alex Schmidt asks Michael Swaim, Adam Ganser, Monika Scott, Mike Drucker and Christian Ramirez, "what is the best video game universe to live in?" Tickets are $7 and available here: https://goo.gl/WCKg8f

*Extremely Michael Caine Voice* Master Wayne, now that it's August, it's Christopher Nolan month on Cracked Movie Club. Join hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson for crazy behind-the-scenes stories, philosophical fan-theories and jokes - lots of stupid jokes - about Christopher Nolan's filmography, starting with The Prestige: https://goo.gl/saER6v

To hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

And if you were really hurting for more Cracked podcasts, we have great news for you. We're proud to announce our newest podcast venture, Cracked Gets Personal. In this 10-part miniseries, Cracked's Robert Evans and Rick and Morty's Brandon Johnson are adapting some of Cracked's most popular Personal Experience articles into an audio-documentary. Hear what it's like to live a day as a heroin addict, a garbageman, and rural ER doctor. The first two episodes premiere on Wednesday, August 16th and you can subscribe now by searching for Cracked Gets Personal on your podcast app of choice or clicking here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/Q1bFap

FOOTNOTES

Article: Cracked: 6 Facts That Will Clear Up Your Confusing Life: https://goo.gl/vL8M9f

Article: Cracked: 5 Reasons You Hated School (That You Were Right About): https://goo.gl/PSH13C

Book: Tony Wagner & Ted Dintersmith: Most Likely to Succeed: Preparing Our Kids for the Innovation Era: https://goo.gl/LXNPZN

Video: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO): Coal: https://goo.gl/f75xiG

Article: Washington Post: If Trump restricts skilled immigrants, the U.S. could lose jobs to other countries: https://goo.gl/kWJWmp

Article: New York Times: Rural Areas Brace for a Shortage of Doctors Due to Visa Policy: https://goo.gl/7UHTja

Article: Washington Post: U.S. faces 90,000 doctor shortage by 2025, medical school association warns: https://goo.gl/6pKpbB

Article: Fortune: Technology will replace 80% of what doctors do: https://goo.gl/2yP1eY

Thanks to those plucky kids in Stranger Things and the larger proliferation of nerd culture, we're happy to announce that Dungeons and Dragons is officially cool now. And as with many things that are either retaining or finding success almost a fifth of the way into this new century, DnD is doing it by adapting to the times. Groups can now conduct entire campaigns online (no more meeting in mom's basement); YouTube, podcasts, etc. have created more DnD content than the average player knows what to do with; and the DnD-style role-playing game has expanded to multiple genres, so players who would rather walk on broken glass than participate in anything with the word "Dragons" in it, can play a comedy, horror or sci-fi RPG game.

DnD is so cool, its reach has expanded to prison, the coolest place. Yes, prisoners are playing DnD instead of dominoes or chess or the stabbing game (never heard of it? It's the game where you just stab people).

The reach and stature of Dungeons has expanded so much, after having our first African-American president and our second criminally insane one, who knows, in a few years, we may have our first president who goes by Zudlud Geodeheart, the Deep Gnome Barbarian. President Geodeheart could probably pass some healthcare legislation. 

On this week's podcast, Alex Schmidt is taking his great axe, 100 gold, and a poison resistance elixir around Los Angeles for a sort-of state of the state of Dungeons and Dragons. First, he's joined by Cracked's Michael Swaim to speak with Spencer Crittenden of HarmonQuest, and they talk about what it's like being one of the most famous Dungeon Masters in the world. Later, Alex speaks with documentarian Elisabeth De Kleer, whose viral article and video about prisoners who play DnD shines a humanizing light on how table-top RPG games can provide a therapeutic effect on the incarcerated and even patients with mental illnesses. Lastly, Alex sits down with Geoffrey Golden and Lee Keeler, who have adapted the cult-comedy classic "Wet Hot American Summer" into an RPG game coming out later this year.

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

West Coast! Pack an extra life, some elixirs and a poke ball. The next live Cracked Podcast is Saturday, August 12th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Alex Schmidt asks Michael Swaim, Adam Ganser, Monika Scott, Mike Drucker and Brodie Reed, "what is the best video game universe to live in?" Tickets are $7 and available here: https://goo.gl/WCKg8f

Guys. Gals. Aliens. Did you miss the premiere of Cracked's newest podcast, Cracked Movie Club? Don't worry. There's plenty of time to catch up. Hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson feature a new director each month as they do a deep into four of the director's films with jokes, insane behind-the-scene stories and crazy fan theories. And July is devoted to none other than Steven Spielberg.

Listen to their episode about Raiders of the Lost Ark here: https://goo.gl/ygBfW1

Listen to their episode about Jurassic Park here: https://goo.gl/FK9gV4

Listen to their episode about E.T. here: https://goo.gl/aQmqzD

Listen to their episode about Jaws here: https://goo.gl/NdGi31

And to hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

Footnotes: 

Spencer Crittenden on Twitter: https://goo.gl/3WqEi5

Article: Cracked: 5 Ways Your Dungeon Master Can Ruin Any D&D Session: https://goo.gl/fJj4p2

Video: Deadliest Warrior: Apache vs. Gladiator: https://goo.gl/RWe2Uf

Video: HarmonQuest: Episode 1: https://goo.gl/q0ka3m

Dragons in the Department of Corrections: https://goo.gl/1iumQr

Article: Vice: Dragons and the Department of Corrections: https://goo.gl/bMC9n6

Video: Vice: Escaping Prison With Dungeons and Dragons: https://goo.gl/RNpcgv

Video: CNN: The Bard Behind Bars: https://goo.gl/oYooRX

Scholarly Article: Wayne D. Blackmon: Dungeons and Dragons: The Use of a Fantasy Game in the Psychotherapeutic Treatment of a Young Adult: https://goo.gl/3VsbYp

Dragons in the Department of Corrections: https://goo.gl/1iumQr

Movie: Wet Hot American Summer: http://amzn.to/2vJTBhD

Wet Hot American Summer Fantasy Camp: https://goo.gl/XJ2BCg

Wizards of Cockblock Forest: https://goo.gl/m36d8q

Thanks to those plucky kids in Stranger Things and the larger proliferation of nerd culture, we're happy to announce that Dungeons and Dragons is officially cool now. And as with many things that are either retaining or finding success almost a fifth of the way into this new century, DnD is doing it by adapting to the times. Groups can now conduct entire campaigns online (no more meeting in mom's basement); YouTube, podcasts, etc. have created more DnD content than the average player knows what to do with; and the DnD-style role-playing game has expanded to multiple genres, so players who would rather walk on broken glass than participate in anything with the word "Dragons" in it, can play a comedy, horror or sci-fi RPG game.

DnD is so cool, its reach has expanded to prison, the coolest place. Yes, prisoners are playing DnD instead of dominoes or chess or the stabbing game (never heard of it? It's the game where you just stab people).

The reach and stature of Dungeons has expanded so much, after having our first African-American president and our second criminally insane one, who knows, in a few years, we may have our first president who goes by Zudlud Geodeheart, the Deep Gnome Barbarian. President Geodeheart could probably pass some healthcare legislation. 

On this week's podcast, Alex Schmidt is taking his great axe, 100 gold, and a poison resistance elixir around Los Angeles for a sort-of state of the state of Dungeons and Dragons. First, he's joined by Cracked's Michael Swaim to speak with Spencer Crittenden of HarmonQuest, and they talk about what it's like being one of the most famous Dungeon Masters in the world. Later, Alex speaks with documentarian Elisabeth De Kleer, whose viral article and video about prisoners who play DnD shines a humanizing light on how table-top RPG games can provide a therapeutic effect on the incarcerated and even patients with mental illnesses. Lastly, Alex sits down with Geoffrey Golden and Lee Keeler, who have adapted the cult-comedy classic "Wet Hot American Summer" into an RPG game coming out later this year.

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

West Coast! Pack an extra life, some elixirs and a poke ball. The next live Cracked Podcast is Saturday, August 12th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Alex Schmidt asks Michael Swaim, Adam Ganser, Monika Scott, Mike Drucker and Brodie Reed, "what is the best video game universe to live in?" Tickets are $7 and available here: https://goo.gl/WCKg8f

Guys. Gals. Aliens. Did you miss the premiere of Cracked's newest podcast, Cracked Movie Club? Don't worry. There's plenty of time to catch up. Hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson feature a new director each month as they do a deep into four of the director's films with jokes, insane behind-the-scene stories and crazy fan theories. And July is devoted to none other than Steven Spielberg.

Listen to their episode about Raiders of the Lost Ark here: https://goo.gl/ygBfW1

Listen to their episode about Jurassic Park here: https://goo.gl/FK9gV4

Listen to their episode about E.T. here: https://goo.gl/aQmqzD

Listen to their episode about Jaws here: https://goo.gl/NdGi31

And to hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

Footnotes: 

Spencer Crittenden on Twitter: https://goo.gl/3WqEi5

Article: Cracked: 5 Ways Your Dungeon Master Can Ruin Any D&D Session: https://goo.gl/fJj4p2

Video: Deadliest Warrior: Apache vs. Gladiator: https://goo.gl/RWe2Uf

Video: HarmonQuest: Episode 1: https://goo.gl/q0ka3m

Dragons in the Department of Corrections: https://goo.gl/1iumQr

Article: Vice: Dragons and the Department of Corrections: https://goo.gl/bMC9n6

Video: Vice: Escaping Prison With Dungeons and Dragons: https://goo.gl/RNpcgv

Video: CNN: The Bard Behind Bars: https://goo.gl/oYooRX

Scholarly Article: Wayne D. Blackmon: Dungeons and Dragons: The Use of a Fantasy Game in the Psychotherapeutic Treatment of a Young Adult: https://goo.gl/3VsbYp

Dragons in the Department of Corrections: https://goo.gl/1iumQr

Movie: Wet Hot American Summer: http://amzn.to/2vJTBhD

Wet Hot American Summer Fantasy Camp: https://goo.gl/XJ2BCg

Wizards of Cockblock Forest: https://goo.gl/m36d8q

If sci-fi movies have taught you one thing about species with queen-based social hierarchies, it's that you should always kill the queen. Same goes for insects right? Kill the queen and the ant hill or bee's nest goes away. Sounds good, unless you're dealing with Argentine ants, who have about 300 queens for every 1,000 worker ants. 

How do you kill them? 

You don't.

Where do they live? Probably Argentina, right? 

Wrong, they've taken over just about every continent other than Antarctica. So good luck with your new insect overlords.

On this week's podcast, Alex Schmidt is joined by Cracked's Katie Goldin and Daniel O'Brien, as well as comedians Joey Clift, Caitlin Gill and Matt Kirshen to discuss ants, crows, cats, immortal jellyfish and 7 other species whose crazy abilities will allow them to take over the world once us humans are gone.

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

West Coast! Pack an extra life, some elixirs and a poke ball. The next live Cracked Podcast is Saturday, August 12th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Alex Schmidt asks Michael Swaim, Adam Ganser, Monika Scott, Mike Drucker and Brodie Reed, "what is the best video game universe to live in?" Tickets are $7 and here: https://goo.gl/WCKg8f

Guys. Gals. Aliens. Did you miss the premiere of Cracked's newest podcast, Cracked Movie Club? Don't worry. There's plenty of time to catch up. Hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson feature a new director each month as they do a deep into four of the director's films with jokes, insane behind-the-scene stories and crazy fan theories. And July is devoted to none other than Steven Spielberg.

Listen to their episode about Raiders of the Lost Ark here: https://goo.gl/ygBfW1

Listen to their episode about Jurassic Park here: https://goo.gl/FK9gV4

Listen to their episode about E.T. here: https://goo.gl/aQmqzD

And to hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

Footnotes:

Caitlin Gill on Twitter: https://goo.gl/HblhwS

Katie Goldin on Twitter: https://goo.gl/GBnSWq

Matt Kirshen on Twitter: https://goo.gl/TC2tML

Joey Clift on Twitter: https://goo.gl/oXXSBe

Daniel O'Brien on Twitter: https://goo.gl/oQWtkY

Article: The Atlantic: These Dolphins Are Using Sea Sponges As Tools: https://goo.gl/Gic9E1

Article: Wired: Clever Dolphins Use Shells To Catch Fish: https://goo.gl/CBu32Q

Article: BBC: The Dolphins That Kill Each Other's Young: https://goo.gl/GwKnDG

Article: BBC News: Ant Mega-Colony Takes Over World: https://goo.gl/JETzX

Article: Cracked: 6 Animals That Kill Nature's Scariest Creatures For Fun: https://goo.gl/EPu58

Article: Cracked: 5 Animals That Could Take Over The World (If They Wanted To): https://goo.gl/xq0W1

Article: Cracked: 5 Animals Who Taught Themselves Eerily Human Skills: https://goo.gl/3R3zxb

Article: Cracked: The 6 Most Horrifying Abilities Animals Are Evolving: https://goo.gl/pZUW48

Article: Cracked: 29 Animals You Didn't Realize Were Evil Geniuses: https://goo.gl/E49yS9

Article: Cracked: 5 Super-Adorable Animals That Can Kill The Hell Out Of You: https://goo.gl/wr0MWL

Video: Raccoon Tries To Eat Cotton Candy: https://goo.gl/yULLCR

Website: Daptone Records: https://goo.gl/Vn5rbB​

If sci-fi movies have taught you one thing about species with queen-based social hierarchies, it's that you should always kill the queen. Same goes for insects right? Kill the queen and the ant hill or bee's nest goes away. Sounds good, unless you're dealing with Argentine ants, who have about 300 queens for every 1,000 worker ants. 

How do you kill them? 

You don't.

Where do they live? Probably Argentina, right? 

Wrong, they've taken over just about every continent other than Antarctica. So good luck with your new insect overlords.

On this week's podcast, Alex Schmidt is joined by Cracked's Katie Goldin and Daniel O'Brien, as well as comedians Joey Clift, Caitlin Gill and Matt Kirshen to discuss ants, crows, cats, immortal jellyfish and 7 other species whose crazy abilities will allow them to take over the world once us humans are gone.

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

West Coast! Pack an extra life, some elixirs and a poke ball. The next live Cracked Podcast is Saturday, August 12th at 7pm at the UCB Sunset Theatre in Los Angeles. Alex Schmidt asks Michael Swaim, Adam Ganser, Monika Scott, Mike Drucker and Brodie Reed, "what is the best video game universe to live in?" Tickets are $7 and here: https://goo.gl/WCKg8f

Guys. Gals. Aliens. Did you miss the premiere of Cracked's newest podcast, Cracked Movie Club? Don't worry. There's plenty of time to catch up. Hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson feature a new director each month as they do a deep into four of the director's films with jokes, insane behind-the-scene stories and crazy fan theories. And July is devoted to none other than Steven Spielberg.

Listen to their episode about Raiders of the Lost Ark here: https://goo.gl/ygBfW1

Listen to their episode about Jurassic Park here: https://goo.gl/FK9gV4

Listen to their episode about E.T. here: https://goo.gl/aQmqzD

And to hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

Footnotes:

Caitlin Gill on Twitter: https://goo.gl/HblhwS

Katie Goldin on Twitter: https://goo.gl/GBnSWq

Matt Kirshen on Twitter: https://goo.gl/TC2tML

Joey Clift on Twitter: https://goo.gl/oXXSBe

Daniel O'Brien on Twitter: https://goo.gl/oQWtkY

Article: The Atlantic: These Dolphins Are Using Sea Sponges As Tools: https://goo.gl/Gic9E1

Article: Wired: Clever Dolphins Use Shells To Catch Fish: https://goo.gl/CBu32Q

Article: BBC: The Dolphins That Kill Each Other's Young: https://goo.gl/GwKnDG

Article: BBC News: Ant Mega-Colony Takes Over World: https://goo.gl/JETzX

Article: Cracked: 6 Animals That Kill Nature's Scariest Creatures For Fun: https://goo.gl/EPu58

Article: Cracked: 5 Animals That Could Take Over The World (If They Wanted To): https://goo.gl/xq0W1

Article: Cracked: 5 Animals Who Taught Themselves Eerily Human Skills: https://goo.gl/3R3zxb

Article: Cracked: The 6 Most Horrifying Abilities Animals Are Evolving: https://goo.gl/pZUW48

Article: Cracked: 29 Animals You Didn't Realize Were Evil Geniuses: https://goo.gl/E49yS9

Article: Cracked: 5 Super-Adorable Animals That Can Kill The Hell Out Of You: https://goo.gl/wr0MWL

Video: Raccoon Tries To Eat Cotton Candy: https://goo.gl/yULLCR

Website: Daptone Records: https://goo.gl/Vn5rbB​

All the hip young kids are using a thing called the internet these days. In fact, if you're reading this summary or listening to this episode, odds are you're using the internet right now. But what if it all just went away? No podcasts, no turn-by-turn directions, no swiping for romantic partners, hell, most of us wouldn't even have jobs if there were no internet (see: everyone at Cracked).

It's an interesting thought experiment to...think about...and experiment on. What would you do for a living; how would you get by day-to-day without the comfort, the convenience, the necessity of the internet?

Alex Schmidt and Kristi Harrison ask the Cracked staff that very question in this episode. They chat with Abe Epperson, Tom Reimann, Ann Smiley, Saundra Sorenson and Brett Rader about the unthinkable--how could we live 21st century life without the internet?

East Coast! The Cracked Podcast is coming to you! The Cracked Podcast will be a part of the Now Hear This podcast festival in New York, taking place September 8th-10th. For $20 off your ticket, head to NowHearThisFest.com and enter code 'CRACKED' at checkout.

Guys. Gals. Aliens. Did you miss the premiere of Cracked's newest podcast, Cracked Movie Club? Don't worry. There's plenty of time to catch up. Hosts Tom Reimann and Abe Epperson feature a new director each month as they do a deep into four of the director's films with jokes, insane behind-the-scene stories and crazy fan theories. And July is devoted to none other than Steven Spielberg.

Listen to their episode about Raiders of the Lost Ark here: https://goo.gl/ygBfW1

Listen to their episode about Jurassic Park here: https://goo.gl/FK9gV4

And to hear the newest episode each and every Thursday, search for Cracked Movie Club in your podcast app of choice or click here to find it on Apple Podcasts: https://goo.gl/fQ2o72

Footnotes:

Data: Pew Research: Internet/Broadband Fact Sheet: https://goo.gl/zc7G2e

Article: Pew Research: How US Tech-Sector Jobs Have Grown, Changed In 15 Years: https://goo.gl/KfE5sx

Data: TechCrunch: Unicorn Leaderboard: https://goo.gl/QhMzds

Article: Mashable: Twitter's Massive 2008: https://goo.gl/64sLFp

Book: Seneca: On The Shortness Of Life: https://goo.gl/sRJS3c

Article: MIT Technology Review: First Object Teleported From Earth To Orbit: https://goo.gl/dvhKiq

Article: New York Times: ‘Manspreading’ on New York Subways Is Target of New M.T.A. Campaign: https://goo.gl/BkS5r2