The Dr CK Bray Show

This week, we revisit when three buddies caught up about, well, buddies!

Paul Morris, Global Learning Consultant, kicks back and chats with Jason and Chris about the extraordinary, enduring power of friendship. In an increasingly digital world where we can simultaneously feel constantly connected yet deeply disconnected, the definition of 'friendship' is becoming more complex. Covering topics such as psychological safety, courage and social evolution - the friendship continuum is broad, let's explore and jump in!

Welcome to The At Our Best Podcast - hosted by Jason Moore and Dr. CK Bray. Using a little science and a lot of common sense, some smart, funny, interesting people talk about the everyday strategies that help us be at our best. Interested to learn more and keep updated? https://aob.work/podcast

This week Dr. Bray has a buffet of new brain research for you. He discusses recent findings in how education, exercise, and regret affect the brain. You will be shocked to learn how much your dedication to lifelong learning and exercise can lead to a physically healthy and brain-healthy life as you age.

Dr. Bray also discusses the two different types of regret and compares the findings to research done with individuals at the end of their lives. Finally, Dr. Bray answers a listener’s question about Season Affectiveness Disorder (SAD).

Listen to this episode, and you will have completed your learning for the day!

References:

• Academic Education Can Positively Affect Aging of the Brain. Lutz Jancke
• Enhanced Nerve Transmission Seen in Older Adults Who Remain Active. Jan 7, 2022, Alzheimer’s & Dementia: The Journal of the Alzheimer’s Association. Dr. Kaitlin Casaletto.
• Regret Can Be All-Consuming: How You Can Overcome It. Jan. 9th, 2022. “The Conversation.”

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY

“The benefits of education and life-long learning extend into old age.”

“We’re more likely to regret the things we didn’t do.”

This past week I watched a National Geographic documentary about the story of 12 young boys and their football coach who were trapped in a cave in Thailand from the fast rising waters of the monsoons. I loved the documentary but was almost thrown off the couch by a question that was posed to a few of the rescuers. (As a behavioral researcher I LOVE insightful questions!) Their answers had me thinking this whole week and I hope to get you thinking as well.

I also discuss an 80 year old study that provides simple, but profound insight into increasing your longevity, reducing the aging of your brain, and creating happiness and meaning in your life.

This is an inspirational podcast with profound research to back it up. Enjoy!

-National Geographic Documentary “The Rescue.” I watched it on Disney Plus.

-Article in Medium.com “An 80-Year Harvard Study Reveals the Secret to Long-Term Happiness.” By Neeramtra Reddy.

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY

“We have to choose the right coping mechanisms, channel your energy into the right thing.”

“Do things that push you out of your comfort zone.”

“Appreciate who you are, take care of yourself, and share it with others.”

“Are you exactly who you need to be?”

Everyone is talking about the "Great Reset." I am more interested in what I am calling the "Great Personal Reset." Individuals who have adapted, changed, and transformed their life during a pivotal point in the world's history.

While many of us focused on survival and dealing with the constant and massive upheavals in work, socializing, physical activity, and even how we connect with friends, other individuals took a time-out to reconsider their lives and dreams. It is a fascinating object lesson in human behavior. The ability to switch from threat to reward and use the opportunity to make your life (and the lives of those you love) better. The ability to make lemonade out of a pandemic lemon.

This is part 2 of a look at the “Great Reset” and the science of adapting and the stories of those who took the pandemic pause to reevaluate their dreams goals and answer the questions of, "Is this the life I want to be living and is it full of meaning and purpose?”

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY

“Great growth always stems from hardships.”

“Most of us are resistant to change.”

“Success begets success.”

Everyone is talking about the "Great Reset." I am more interested in what I am calling the "Great Personal Reset." Individuals who have adapted, changed, and transformed their life during a pivotal point in the world's history.

While many of us focused on survival and dealing with the constant and massive upheavals in work, socializing, physical activity, and even how we connect with friends, other individuals took a time-out to reconsider their lives and dreams. It is a fascinating object lesson in human behavior. The ability to switch from threat to reward and use the opportunity to make your life (and the lives of those you love) better. The ability to make lemonade out of a pandemic lemon.

This podcast looks at the science of adapting and the stories of those who took the pandemic pause to reevaluate their dreams goals and answer the questions of, "Is this the life I want to be living, and is it full of meaning and purpose. I have learned a lot in studying this subject, and I am ashamed to admit that I am late for this party.

I have some self-reflection and a few hard questions I need to answer for myself. Luckily, there is no better time than now--the pause is still ongoing.

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY

“You’re never too old.”

“It’s an ever-changing evolution in our careers and dreams.”

“The pandemic gave us a glimpse of the essential.”

“Our identity is complex, it’s formed from many sources.”

“A life reset is the stuff of dreams!”

This is Dr. Bray’s favorite podcast of the year. In this humorous, witty, and science-packed podcast, Dr. Bray discusses “The Creep Factor.” Utilizing the latest research from Knox College, Dr. Bray shares the behaviors, characteristics, hobbies, and jobs of those who are deemed to be “creepy.” He also shares five ways to NOT be a creepy individual. You don’t want to miss this episode; you need to find out where you fit on the creep scale!

**Jennifer V. Fayard Associate Professor of Psychology. “How to Not Be Creepy!” Nov/Dec 2021 Psychology Today

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY
“Creepy people don’t realize it.”
“Perception isn’t always reality.”

As we begin a New Year with new resolutions, new hope for the future, and a renewed sense of what is important and meaningful in life, Dr. Bray wanted to share information on one of the best ways to have a great 2022.

Extensive research has shown the importance of forgiving others. It is good for your physical health, mental health, and overall wellbeing. But, even more critical and life-changing is the ability to forgive yourself. We often hold on to our failures, mistakes, and memories of hurting others. If continued long enough, those thoughts become strong narratives that cloud how we view the world, our relationships, and our ability to succeed and thrive.

In this episode, Dr. Bray discusses the four pillars of making amends with yourself and four tools to assist you with learning how to have self-compassion, letting the past go, and moving on with your life.

There is no better way to start the New Year!

**Matt James, Ph.D., is the author of The Foundation of Huna: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Times. Jan/Feb 2022 Psychology Today.

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY
“Most of our time is spent thinking about the past or our future, we’re rarely in the moment of the present.”
“We create our own reality.”
“We are all doing the very best we can at the moment.”
“Retain the lesson, release everything else.”

Happy New Year! It is a new beginning full of hope and optimism for 2022. As you look down the 2022 road and think about what you want to accomplish, who you want to be, and what experiences you want to have, you must do one thing! You need a little Naikan before setting your goals. Naikan is the Japanese art of self-reflection. It means “looking inside.” It is a method that helps us understand ourselves, our relationships and changes our perception. Naikan is based on three questions, with each question requiring three minutes of thinking. It is one of the best methods of self-reflection I have found in recent years. In nine minutes, you can see your life from a whole new perspective. 3

SELF-REFLECTION QUESTIONS:
1. What have I received from _________?
2. What have I given to _________?
3. What troubles/difficulties have I caused?

“The Headwinds/Tailwinds Asymmetry” by Shai Davidai & Thomas Gilovich

QUOTES BY DR. BRAY
“We live so much in our heads… there is so much we miss when we don’t stop & self-reflect.”
“The end goal of this is to shift the way we think, from complaint-based to life appreciation.”
“The things we need most are in the darkest places in our lives.”

The journey continues with Creativity and Curiosity! Be sure and check out episode 408 (part 1) to learn more about the benefits and barriers to creativity. In this episode, Dr. Bray dives into the five ways you can bolster your creativity and curiosity. Dr. Bray shares how these five steps impact your professional and personal lives. He also throws in a few New Years' Eve goals and resolution advice! You need to add and subtract this year. Finally, Dr. Bray builds a foundation for you to look at 2022 from a new perspective and change your roadmap a bit as you create the type of person you want to be. HBR Francesca Gino Oct 2019