An Austrian manager’s team talk has made headlines this week and somehow the fact that he waving a dildo around in front of his players isn’t the most confusing detail about it…

Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish log into UEFA.com (and quickly log back out again) before checking in with the best of the Prem action this weekend. Vish realises that the best manager for Cole Palmer is Neil Warnock, while Andy makes his defence of Pep Guardiola and Man City after further talk of their demise in midweek.

Plus, Mark Lawrenson is fuming and Phil Neville’s Portland Timbers have an unusual start to their season…

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