The Problem With Perfect

Choosing a word for the year is all the buzz on social media these days, but is it worth the hype? In this episode we talk about how choosing a word for the year has helped shaped our year's past and give you three reasons why you should choose one NOW in 2020.

Ready to get your FREE step-by-step guide for Choosing and Using Your Word for the Year? Click here: https://mailchi.mp/88cd02892508/wordfortheyear

SHOW NOTES

2:00: Learn what one word helped Robin heal in 2019 after her son's cancer battle.

4:40: Which is more likely to stick, a New Years Resolution or a Word for the Year?

7:15: Can choosing a word increase your productivity?

14:45: Can a word help prepare you for the difficult days that lie ahead this year? Learn what one word transformed how Robin viewed a year of cancer treatment.

15:45: Convinced you need a word for the year, but not sure how to choose one? We are giving you a FREE step by step guide to choosing and using a word for 2020.

17:00: What's Robin's word for the year? The BIG reveal you've been asking for!

Want to read more about Robin's word for 2020, check out her recent blog post on it on her Robin May Ministries Facebook page.

We want to connect with you!
Find us on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo
or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

Sarah Gregg's life looked perfect from the outside, but on the inside she found herself exhausted and disappointed. All this led her to bravely hit the "emergency re-start button" and eventually led her down a path where she discovered the psychological practice of flow. In this second of a two-part series with Sarah, she walks us through her innovative method of using flow which is the basis of her new book, Find Your Flow: Capture it, Use it, Make it Yours. Not only is Sarah gracious with sharing her secrets from the book, she also shares how the method helped her find the contentment her life was missing.

SHOW NOTES

Guest: Sarah Gregg, Author of Find Your Flow: Capture it, Use it, Make it Yours

3:00, How do three minutes of negative news in the morning impact the next eight hours of your day?

6:30: What is the connection between gratitude and productivity or is there one?

8:30: Being grateful sounds so simple. So why is it so hard to do on a regular basis? And can we learn to do it better?

10:15: What do you take for granted? Being more grateful might start here.

12:30: What does it mean to be "forward focused"? And what does that look like in the real world on a daily basis?

15: Is it possible to find flow with tasks you don't like doing?

18:45 Listen to how flow changed Sarah's life and see if it sounds like something you could benefit from.

25: Learn about the format of Sarah's new book and how to get a free resource that will help you get started in your own practice of flow.

To order the book and claim your free resource, go to https://findyourflowthebook.com/

To connect with Sarah on Instagram @thepowertoreinvent

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo
or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

Sarah Gregg isn't unlike you or us. She believed that if she did everything right and followed all the rules, success and happiness would follow. But when this self-proclaimed over-achiever from Northern Ireland achieved all her goals, happiness eluded her. Sarah's life looked perfect from the outside, but on the inside she found herself exhausted and disappointed. All this led her to bravely hit the "emergency re-start button" and eventually led her down a path where she discovered flow.

In this first of a two-part series with Sarah, she defines the psychological practice of flow and its benefits and even shares some of her innovative secrets from her new book, Find Your Flow: Capture it, Use it, Make it Yours. If you're searching for ways to improve your productivity and increase your happiness, then these are must-listen episodes.

SHOW NOTES:

3:15 Does Copenhagen really deserve to be on the "Happiest Places" list?

5:40: Why does achieving everything make us feel so exhausted and empty?

8:30: Can quitting your job to travel full time bring you true happiness?

13:00: Learn how flow can bring you both success AND happiness. Have your cake and eat it too, girl.

15:30:  Learn the two types of flow: flow state, and unified flow and how each can be applied to your life.

23:20, Learn how you can increase your productivity by 500% by these core conditions of flow.

Stay tuned for part two next week!!

To order Sarah's book: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/45731554-find-your-flow

To connect with Sarah on Instagram @thepowertoreinvent

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo
or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

We have all been in situations where we feel like we don't belong. Whether it's Christmas dinner with the family or in-laws, a New Year's celebration, or even feeling like you don't fit in at church - the opportunities to feel like we are alone are seemingly endless. So what is it about these occasions that make us feel uncomfortable? More importantly, is it possible to overcome this feeling and learn to flourish in new environments? Join us as we answer these questions and more in this episode of The Problem With Perfect.


Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

There will be "Top 10 Lists of the Decade" popping up everywhere during the next week. Instead of reading what some stranger says defined the last decade, why not do it for yourself? What did you learn about your personal development, romantic relationships, career, friendships and spirituality during the last ten years? In this episode, we discuss how time has changed us and offer you a template for doing this exercise in self-exploration. You might just be surprised at how far you've come in these five important areas of your life.

SHOW NOTES:

At 3:20, Rachel describes the template used to reflect on the key takeaway(s) in each of these core five areas of life. Then she explains how her comment,  "All I know is that the more I know, the less I know" defines what she learned about personal development during the last decade.

At 7:00, Robin discusses how she overcame her fear of failure and decided to try new things, even as she moved into her 40's.

At 11:00, Robin talks about how the heartbreaks of life have changed her and transformed her relationship with her husband. 

At 16:00, she shares how consistent love over time helped her believe she is enough.

At 17:45, Rachel shares how dating during the last decade has taught her to keep breakups and heartache in perspective.

At 20:00, she tells you how to know if the person you're dating is worth the effort.

At 22:00, Rachel shares how she had the perfect job as a high-schooler even though she didn't make a dime. This shaped her work ethic and set her on a career path that has been full of twists and surprises.

At 25:20, Robin explains how she learned that when she says "YES" to additional work responsibilities, she is saying "NO" to time she could be spending with family or friends.

At 28:00, Robin and Rachel talk about how their spiritual imperfections led them to shame and how God's love frees them.

At 32:00, Rachel talks about the painful process of letting go of high school and college friends, while Robin highlights how time changes everything.

At 37:45, the two help you take what you learn from doing this exercise to help set intentions for the decade ahead. 


Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

It's cold and dark outside. Soon Christmas will be over, leaving nothing but time between us and the saving grace that we affectionately call Spring. During these winter months, do you find yourself struggling to be productive? Is doing anything other than snuggling up on the couch a real feat? Or maybe you notice you're easily agitated with those around you? If so, then this episode about SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) might help answer why.

In it, we talk to Amanda, a health and wellness guru who lives in Seattle who helps us understand what SAD is and isn't. She also explains how to recognize it in your life or in the life of someone you love, and offers practical tips for surviving a season with SAD. 

SHOW NOTES:

Guest: Amanda from Every Day Wellness with Amanda: a certified athletic trainer, public speaker, and program manager (https://everydaywellnesswithamanda.com/). Amanda started Everyday Wellness as a way to teach real people how to mix practical wellness tips into their everyday lives.

At 3:45, Amanda defines what SAD is and discusses its prevalence.

At 8:30, she explains the factors that can contribute to SAD.

At 10:00, we discuss the telltale signs of SAD that can help us self-diagnose if we think we might be suffering from it.

At 13:30, we learn about some of the professional and personal consequences SAD sufferers can experience.

At 16:30, Amanda highlights how SAD prompts people to withdraw from others, increasing loneliness and isolationism.

At 18:30, we learn why some countries with the most amount of darkness surprisingly have the happiest people.

At 20:00, Amanda shares practical success tips that have helped her combat SAD.

At 24:30, we close the conversation with insight from Amanda on knowing when people should seek professional and/or peer support for SAD.

Resources:
https://everydaywellnesswithamanda.com/seasonal-affective-disorder-work/

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

We've all heard "fake it to you make it." In fact, we've all done it - maybe we still are! So how do we know when this old adage serves us well (both professionally and personally) and when it's time to be transparent and share our authentic self? In this episode, we get real about the tension of being the new kid on the block on the job, who's trying to make a positive impression and big impact. We also get personal about the one thing married women should not be faking and the potential benefits of faking it till you make it in your relationship with your significant other. 


SHOW NOTES:

At 4:00, Rachel shares her surprise about how much on-the-job training her first "real" job required, even after graduating from one of the country's top journalism programs.

At 9:10, we talk about learning to be the varsity version of ourselves as opposed to the JV version of our bosses.

At 12:00, we acknowledge the stress of wanting people to think we have it all figured out instead of playing the newbie card and maximizing our learning opportunities.

At 14:00, we stress the importance of finding a mentor in the workplace.

At 19:30, Robin explains how to recognize dead-end thinking in an effort to re-train our brains. She shares what she and her bestie think women shouldn't be faking in their sexual encounters versus situations in which they might benefit from the re-training of the mind.

At 25:45, we introduce how to create new neuro-pathways and how they can eventually provide hope for transformation from the world's messages that constantly tell us we are not enough.

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Interested in having Robin speak at your next event? Connect with her on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

If ever there is a time when we can get overwhelmed and completely drained, the holiday season is it! These are the six weeks of the year where we take our already hectic and chaotic lives and add the additional stresses of shopping, decorating, entertaining and making sure everyone around us is happy.

In this episode, we empower ourselves and you to set healthy boundaries, allowing us all to find more joy in this "happiest season of all."  We discuss how to know where our thoughts, feelings and actions end and where others' begins. We help you determine when it's time to say no, how that looks in real life and what to do when our boundary upsets someone we love.

SHOW NOTES:
At 1:30, Rachel and Robin share the unlikely story of becoming partners on the podcast, since they are 22 years apart in age and live 200 miles from each other.

At 8:00, Rachel and Robin discuss how the holidays become upside down, as our responsibilities (and expectations) exceed our resources and creating a need for better boundaries.

At 14:00, the pair define boundaries (what are we responsible for) and how they help us create balance and help us find joy.

At 17:00, Robin shares how her need for affirmation and her desire not to disappoint people have made it difficult to set boundaries.

At 24:30, Rachel talks us through how to know if our friends and family are capable of "going to the deep end" with us and how this impacts where we set boundaries with them. Robin argues that the pain (of setting boundaries) is worth the gain.


For more in-depth information on boundaries, check out the many resources by Drs. Cloud and Townsend who wrote the much of the ground-breaking thought on the subject.

Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend

Other books in this series include Boundaries in Marriage, Boundaries in Dating, Boundaries with Kids and Boundaries for Leaders.

Or check out http://cloudtwonsend.com for a wealth of free resources, as well as a quiz to determine if you have difficulty establishing and holding boundaries.

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Also connect with Robin on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

Let's face it - relationships can be challenging. You see the world one way; your partner sees it another. As a result, conflict can abound. In this episode, Certified Enneagram Facilitator Dr. Kelly Wright joins us to discuss how our Enneagram number or type can help us better understand ourselves and how we interact with those around us.

At 4:00, Kelly explains what the Enneagram is, the nine types and why we typically don't "like" our number.

At 7:20, Kelly explains the specific challenges that each type brings to relationships.

At 13:30, Kelly answers the question, "Is there an Enneagram match made in heaven?"

At 17:45, Kelly discusses how couples get "triggered" by one another and explains how long it takes to get "un-triggered."

At 20:00, Kelly, Rachel and Robin discuss how to be OK when the people we love aren't.

At 25:20, Kelly offers additional tips for individuals and couples who are interested in how the Enneagram can enrich their relationships.


Guest: Dr. Kelly Wright, LPC and Associate Pastor; Restore Ministries, Woodcrest Chapel, Certified Enneagram Facilitator, Columbia, MO.

To join Kelly for her next workshop, sign up here: https://woodcrest.ccbchurch.com/goto/forms/1076/responses/new

Recommended Readings: 

• The Road Back to You, Ian Cron and Suzanne Stabile
• The Path Between Us, Ian Cron and Suzanne Stabile
• Spiritual Rhythms for the Enneagram, Calhoun and Loughrige
• The Wisdom of the Enneagram, Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson
• The Enneagram, A Christian Perspective, Richard Rohr
• The Enneagram in Love and Work, Helen Palmer
• The Enneagram Made Easy, Elizabeth Wagele
• The Nine Lenses on the World, Jerome Wagner
• Are you my Type? Am I Yours? Relationships Made Easy through the Enneagram, Elizabeth Wagele
• The Essential Enneagram, David Daniels

Helpful Websites:

• Enneagraminstitute.com – Riso and Hudson
• Don't know your Enneagram number? Take the Enneagram quiz using this link: https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/test

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel?
Find them on Instagram here:
https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Also connect with Robin on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]

Maybe Disney and Rom-Com movies are to blame? Or perhaps it's social media? Or maybe it’s just that we are hard-wired for relationship? Whatever the reason, the desire for the perfect relationship often results in us trying to be the perfect partner, which is the perfect recipe for disaster.

In this episode, Dr. Kelly Wright, LPC, discusses how to overcome these unrealistic expectations so that we can move toward having healthier and happier relationships. Whether you are single, married, or single again, this podcast has something for everyone!

SHOW NOTES:

Guest: Dr. Kelly Wright, LPC and Associate Pastor; Restore Ministries, Woodcrest Chapel, Columbia, MO.

At 9:30: Kelly introduces the importance of the 12 stages of attachment and how couples problematically skip several stages and go right to sexual intimacy. To learn more about the stages of attachment, she suggest Bonding by Donald Joy.

At 16:00, Kelly discusses our greatest, deep desires: to be fully known, unconditionally loved and completely accepted.

At 23:00, Kelly shares what she's seen as the biggest struggle for married couples.

At 27:30, Kelly offers her best strategies to combat the challenges of perfectionism in relationships.

At 36:30, we preview next week's episode when Kelly returns to discuss how your Enneagram number impacts your relationships. Don't know you're Enneagram number? Get prepared for next week's conversation by taking the Enneagram quiz using this link: https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/test

Want to connect with Robin and Rachel on Instagram? Find them here: https://instagram.com/theproblemwithperfect?igshid=9jvum57yip6l

Also connect with Robin on Facebook at Robin May Ministries
https://www.facebook.com/2330042033706535/posts/2871699789540754?sfns=mo or on Instagram at:  https://ww.instagram.com/p/B3lFRS8HELd/

Connect with Rachel and her life at the loft:
https://instagram.com/rachel__leigh__?igshid=1erbjftzgyje9

Or Email us your thoughts, questions or anything you want us to know at [email protected]