The Sexual Wellness Sessions

Adapting your life after an accident or illness is something that many individuals and couples have to go through, but many report sex and intimacy being the part of their lives that they feel least resourced to know how to manage with the big changes that have taken place for them. Knowing where to start, how to talk about it or even how to understand how sex might be affected post injury can feel like a very challenging conversation to have with a medical professional, let alone a partner.

Ed & Lois Jackson are a couple who have been through this first hand, when in their twenties their lives changed overnight when Ed suffered a life changing Spinal Cord Injury and was told he may never walk again. Fast forward a year and Ed was climbing Mount Snowdon, and the couple later founded charity Millimetres2Mountains to help those who have been through life changing illness or injury to face new challenges and re-define their own limitations. A big part of this conversation is about how an injury like this impacted them both as individuals and as a couple, both in terms of their relationship but also sex and intimacy. Ed has Brown Séquard Syndrome meaning that he has paralysis on one side of his body and loss of sensation on the other which means that they have had to be creative and adaptive when it comes to sex, and they share how learning how to communicate, laugh and be curious as a couple have been hugely important parts of the process.

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Ed Jackson's professional rugby career got cut short when he dived into the shallow end of a swimming pool in 2017 sustaining a spinal cord injury at C6/C7. Life changed on a sixpence for both him and his wife Lois. A lot of things were taken away, including Ed's, identity, his bladder and bowel performance and his sexual function. Instead of focusing on what Ed couldn't do they directed all their energy into the things he could. This has led him to climbing mountains, public speaking and the creation of their own charity – The Millimetres 2 Mountains Foundation which uses the outdoors to support other people who have gone through trauma. Alongside co-founding the charity Lois also works as a life coach, a part of which is offering support for their beneficiaries. 

Follow Millimetres2Mountains on Instagram at @Millimetres2Mountains and learn more about them at https://www.millimetres2mountains.org/

Follow Lois on Instagram at @LoisJackson8

Follow Ed on Instagram at @EdJackson8

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, and author of The Science Of Sex : Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Attachment theory is a commonly discussed psychological and relational theory that is rooted in how we develop attachments in early childhood, and continue them throughout our lives, adulthood and couple relationships. There are thousands of books written on the topic of how we can understand relationships, be better in relationships and choose the right partner - but Dr Stan Tatkin would argue that as humans we are all difficult and therefore difficult partners; which is why relationships are some of the hardest work that we'll do in our lives. 1.9 Million people have watched his Ted Talk Relationships Are Hard, But Why? And in this episode he explains what's going on for us in terms of our attachment styles, neuroscience and social worlds and how these shape our sex lives and relationships.

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Stan Tatkin, PsyD, MFT Clinician, author, researcher, PACT developer, and co-founder of the PACT Institute. Dr. Tatkin is an assistant clinical professor at UCLA, David Geffen School of Medicine. He maintains a private practice in Southern California and leads PACT programs in the US and internationally. He is the author We Do, Wired for Love, Your Brain on Love, Relationship Rx, Wired for Dating, What Every Therapist Ought to Know, and co-author of Love and War in Intimate Relationships, and the upcoming, In Each Other’s Care.

Watch Stan's Ted Talk Here

Follow Stan on Instagram at @DrStanTatkin

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, and author of The Science Of Sex : Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Sex, pleasure and orgasm are influenced by numerous parts of our lives - biological, social and psychological - but what happens in our brain when we fantasise, experience desire or orgasm? And how do experiences like stress and anxiety interrupt our sex lives on a brain and body level? Neuroscientist, author and researcher Dr Nan Wise unpacks what she has seen in her research using fMRI brain scans, and goes onto explain how the different parts of our lives can work with and against each other to boost or hinder sexual experiences, and what we can to do help. She talks about the role that pleasure plays across our lives, and discusses how our ability to experience healthy pleasures--those that feel good and are good for us-- are not a luxury, but a necessity for overall well-being.

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Dr. Nan Wise is a certified sex therapist, certified relationship specialist, neuroscience researcher, and author of Amazon best seller Why Good Sex Matters: Understanding the Neuroscience of Pleasure for a Smarter, Happier, and More Purpose-Filled Life. Driven by the desire to understand how the brain operates to create moods and behaviours, she returned to academia and completed her Ph.D. in 2014. Her dissertation work, Genital stimulation, imagery, and orgasm in women: an fMRI analysis, resulted in three published studies. Her research has addressed gaps in the scientific literature regarding the neural basis of human sexuality, and as a result, garnered international attention. 

Follow Dr Nan on Instagram at @AskDoctorNan and read her Glamour column Ask Dr. Nan here 

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, and author of The Science Of Sex : Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Research shows at least 1 in 3 women find some aspect of their birth traumatic. Someone's birthing experience can be influenced by an almost unlimited number of factors both contextual and personal, which can make all the difference to how someone feels about their childbirth experience.  Birth trauma can be considered to be a unique trauma experience for various reasons as Dr Rebecca Moore will explore in this episode, and in 2014 birth trauma was recognised in the NICE guidelines.

Many of those affected by birth trauma, describe struggling to know where to turn for support or how to even start a conversation, which can make them feel even more isolated in their experience and add to the symptoms and emotions that they are going through. In this episode Dr Rebecca Moore talks through how we can better understand the impact of a traumatic pregnancy or birth; both for those going through it, partners and loved ones; and how we can start to change the conversation and access to information for the better.

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Dr Rebecca Moore is a Perinatal Psychiatrist with over twenty years experience dealing with infertility, pregnancy loss, anxiety, depression, OCD and trauma. After developing a particular interest in birth trauma, she founded the annual Birth Trauma Conference and Make Birth Better.

Instagram - @BirthBetter @Drrebeccamoore 

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, and author of The Science Of Sex : Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Most of us interact with some form of media on a daily basis, with it creating both positive and negative influence on various aspects of our health and wellbeing. The messages and information that we digest from mass media are now often translated across social media and our smartphones, meaning that it can be hard to constantly think about what we are reading and why, rather than just taking it in. These messages and narratives can show up in our sex lives as myths that we believe to be facts, which are often left unchallenged due to the still taboo nature of sex; and further impact how we think about and experience sex, and how we address problems and challenges in our sex lives. In this episode Sophia Smith Galer unpacks some of the information and disinformation that's impacting our sex lives, and discusses the role of media literacy in our sex education.

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Sophia Smith Galer is an award-winning journalist and content creator credited for pioneering journalism on TikTok.

Sophia's push for representation in newsrooms for younger audiences and the stories and platforms that matter to them has won her a series of accolades, including the British Journalism Awards' Innovation of the Year in 2021, a spot on the Forbes Under 30 List and recognition in British Vogue as one of the 25 most influential women in the UK in 2022.

Follow Sophia on TikTok and Instagram @sophiasmithgaler

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, and author of The Science Of Sex : Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Why is sexual communication one of the key ingredients of our sex lives, but yet is one of the hardest things for us to do?

Very few of us feel well set up or equipped to talk about sex comfortably, and so in this episode Vanessa and Xander Marin New York Times Best Selling authors of  Sex Talks: The Five Conversations That Will Transform Your Love Life and hosts of  Pillow Talks podcast, unpack the specifics and mechanics of how to talk about sex, covering the five conversational steps from their book  - acknowledgement, connection, desire, pleasure and exploration.

Vanessa is a sex therapist with 20 years of experience and has been featured thousands of times in major publications, and Xander describes himself as a regular dude. As a couple they share the ups and downs in their relationship, while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours.

Follow them on Instagram @vanessaandxander

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This episode is sponsored by Roam, a brand changing the game when it comes to sexual wellness by creating inclusive, skincare inspired sex care that is good for you and good for the planet. With a selection of lubes designed for different explorations, from front and back lube to masturbation cream and massage oil. Condoms that contain 40% less packaging than traditional condoms and a selection of discreet, rechargeable toys to guarantee a better solo experience.  Roam believes that everyone should feel confident and comfortable having sex. By breaking down taboos and challenging stigmas around sex, Roam is here to make the world a more sex-positive place and make everyone feel seen. Get 20% off with Code SESSIONS20 at exploreroam.com

Follow Roam on Instagram @exploreroam

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist, and author of The Science Of Sex : Every Question About Your Sex Life Answered.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

The practice of manifesting has gained a lot of attention over the last few years, and so for this final episode of series three I wanted to understand how manifesting can show up in our dating lives, relationships and sex lives. Defined as the practice of thinking aspirational thoughts with the purpose of making them real, I see a lot of cross over with my work as a therapist. Both practices are about helping people to remove barriers and self-doubt, build confidence and helping people to get to where they want to be, whatever that looks like for them.

Not knowing much about manifesting apart from what I have learnt through Roxie Nafousi and her book MANIFEST: 7 Steps to Living Your Best Life, made her the perfect guest for this conversation. Roxie has been named "The Manifesting Queen" by Forbes, and "The A-Lists favourite manifestor" by The Sunday Times Style Magazine.

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Roxie Nafousi is a self-development coach, the author of Sunday Times Bestseller, MANIFEST: 7 Steps to Living Your Best Life, and Manifest: Dive Deeper which is now available for pre-order for release in January 2023. Roxie is also an ambassador for the Mental Health Foundation, hosts the popular podcast series called "The Moments That Made Me", and is the creator of "The Journal" a powerful 12 week self-love and empowerment programme in collaboration with The Head Plan. 

Roxie's commitment to transforming the lives of people who suffer with emotional and mental health issues and helping them to fulfil their potential has seen her become a renowned and respected figure in the wellness world. 

Instagram @roxienafousi  

https://www.roxienafousi.com/

Pre-Order Manifest : Dive Deeper here 

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Today's conversation was brought to you by Hanx, who offer trusted contraception and intimate health treatments - without the stigma. Set up by best friends Sarah and Farah, Hanx offers natural, sustainable, sexual wellness essentials such as condoms and lubricants that are free from unecessary chemicals that can lead to UTIs and yeast infections.

Hanx believe it's time the world stopped being weird about our sex lives, and that starts with tackling taboos around sexual health and they champion a no-blushes approach about everything from your vaginal pH to how to have *that* contraception conversation.

HANX is offering listeners 20% off the Bestseller Bundle, which brings together:

-10 Pack of HANX Condoms in Standard or Large size. Ultra-thin, ultra-sensitive, vegan, biodegradable and no nasties. 

-HANX super-gentle, water-based Lubricant. It's safe to use with condoms and sex toys, for pre-and post partum sex and for those experiencing menopausal dryness. Plus: it's proudly unflavoured with no thrush-inducing glycerine and 

- An organic cotton Subtle Pouch which is perfectly sized to fit a pack of HANX and a Lubricant, plus any other bedroom essentials.

- Just add to basket and use code SWS20 at hanxofficial.com

Instagram @HanxOfficial 

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist. Kate believes that so much of what needs normalising when it comes to sex and relationships can be changed through conversation; and this is why the podcast is focused around the idea of hosting informal but informative conversations.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Despite being a condition which impacts one in five hundred women Vaginismus is a rarely discussed and often misunderstood sexual dysfunction. It’s characterised by the involuntary contraction of the muscles around the vagina which can make penetration painful, difficult and often impossible. There are unlimited reasons for why someone might be struggling with this condition, and equally many ways that it may show up for them in terms of challenges with sex, relationships, dating, body confidence and self-esteem. Even though it’s so common there are very few resources available which makes it difficult for people to know where to turn for information and advice.

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This is where my guests for today come in as The Vaginismus Network is one of the only platforms with advice from both peers and experts. Kat is one of the co-founders, and Rosie is a volunteer who both feel really passionately about this topic as they have Vaginismus themselves. Connecting over their shared experience and feelings, co-founders Kat and Lisa decided to give others what they both felt that they were missing - a way to connect, talk and get advice on a condition that was missing from the mainstream. The Vaginismus Network hosts online and in-person events, offers a matching service to connect people, and has blogs and advice on everything from smear tests,  to vaginismus and pregnancy, dilator training and personal accounts of Vaginismus.

Instagram @thevagnetwork 

Rosie @vaginismuswho 

https://www.thevaginismusnetwork.com/

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In this conversation the topic of pleasure is central to both Kat and Rosie's stories about them managing their vaginismus and building a more positive relationship with their bodies. This is something that is also a huge part of today's sponsor Lelo's ethos and pleasure products; and for this episode they've prepared a special promotion just for you. Listen to our discussion, and use the unique code KATELELO at lelo.to/KATEXLELO to shop their entire pleasure toy range at a discount. Follow Lelo at @Lelo_official

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist. Kate believes that so much of what needs normalising when it comes to sex and relationships can be changed through conversation; and this is why the podcast is focused around the idea of hosting informal but informative conversations.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy

Anxiety can show up in every area of our lives, and sometimes with what feels like no logical explanation or reason. One of the hardest things can also be not knowing how to communicate or explain to a partner about how we are feeling, particularly if from the outside it looks like nothing has changed. Performance anxiety can show up for us in situations both old and new, and anxiety in other areas of our life can leak into our intimate lives. This has the potential to disrupt the relationship status quo and our ability to be intimate, vulnerable or sexual with one another; or if we are single can get in the way of us meeting someone or dating. So we can see that this is a bidirectional relationship where sex and relationships may cause anxiety, and anxiety may impact our sex lives and relationships. 

One of our most natural ways to deal with anxiety is avoidance, but this is polarised with our desire for closeness or intimacy in relationships which can create both inner and outer conflict as we battle between the two. This can present as a wide variety of thoughts, feelings and behaviour which can feel really confusing for both us as individuals, and any partners that we may have.

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My guest for this episode is one of my favourite authors, therapists and podcasters who like me is really passionate about taking therapy out of the therapy room. Anna Mathur hosts the podcast The Therapy Edit which has an astounding nearly 1 million downloads, she has authored two books which both went straight into the top 10 of The Sunday Times bestsellers list - Mind Over Mother: Every Mum’s Guide to Worry and Anxiety in the First Years and Know Your Worth & her latest book that's just out is The Little Book of Calm for New Mums . 

https://www.annamathur.com/

Instagram @AnnaMathur 

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This episode was sponsored by Love Sleep by This Works. 

This Works understand the connection between sex, sleep and well-being and as experts in the field of sleep and circadian rhythms. They have developed the Love Sleep range, a series of bedroom solutions with a 100% natural Superblend with Ylang Ylang and Patchouli, designed to enhance levels of relaxation in your evening space and promote intimacy – the antidote to digital hyper connectivity and over stimulation, paving the way for better sleep and better relationships. 

After using the Love Sleep Pillow Spray 1 in 3 users had more intimate moments.

Find Out More At https://www.thisworks.com/products/love-sleep-pillow-spray

Instagram @ThisWorks 

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The Sexual Wellness Sessions is hosted by Kate Moyle, a Psychosexual & Relationship Therapist and Certified Psycho-Sexologist. Kate believes that so much of what needs normalising when it comes to sex and relationships can be changed through conversation; and this is why the podcast is focused around the idea of hosting informal but informative conversations.

Follow Kate on Instagram at @KateMoyleTherapy