After Ann Anderson Evan's beloved husband killed himself, she wondered what could have led him to such an end. He had not seemed suicidal, or deeply depressed, or haunted by demons. She imagined it must be some secret misery he didn't share even with her. She thought they had shared everything! Over time she came to believe that he was transgender. Could his belief that he could never share that part of himself have led to life being too painful to continue? It would take all the skills she had gained over a long lifetime to respond to this grief.