The Whole Parent Podcast

Want to ask me YOUR questions live like these parents?

Join Parent Lab where we have a call like this every Friday morning: https://myparentlab.com/

If you give in to your child, are you teaching them that tantrums work? Or are you fighting a battle that never needed to happen in the first place?

One of the hardest parts of parenting is figuring out when to hold a boundary and when to let something go. We're constantly told to be consistent, never give in, and stand our ground. But what happens when that advice turns every bedtime, mealtime, and morning routine into an exhausting power struggle?

In this episode of the Whole Parent Podcast, I'm answering real questions from parents inside Parent Lab about the battles that seem impossible to win.

We talk about:

• Bedtime battles: Why kids behave differently for different parents and how to create routines that actually work.
• Food and tantrums: What to do when your child suddenly announces they're starving right before bedtime.
• Picking your battles: Why giving your child autonomy isn't the same as rewarding bad behavior.
• Activities and commitments: When to encourage your child to push through something difficult and when it's okay to quit.
• Setting boundaries: How to be consistent without turning every disagreement into a contest of wills.

Here's the big takeaway: Good parenting isn't about proving you're in charge. It's about knowing which boundaries matter and giving your child freedom everywhere else.

You can hold your kids accountable without fighting battles that never needed to happen.

Join Parent Lab: https://myparentlab.com/

Get access to weekly live group coaching, my complete parenting course library, and a community of parents learning how to raise emotionally healthy kids without punishment.

CHAPTERS

00:00 — Why every parenting battle isn't worth fighting
04:13 — When bedtime becomes chaos with one parent
15:16 — Food battles, ADHD, and bedtime hunger
20:33 — Why giving in isn't always a parenting mistake
28:46 — Making mornings easier without more power struggles
30:25 — Should you make your child stick with an activity?
37:36 — When it's okay to let your child quit
40:51 — Final thoughts and resources

Subscribe for more practical, brain-based parenting advice from Whole Parent.

#ParentingTips #GentleParenting #ParentingBoundaries

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

What if the biggest threat to your child's development isn't screen time, social media, or even the dangers we're constantly trying to protect them from? What if it's the fact that we're not letting them do anything on their own?

Today, I'm joined by Lenore Skenazy, founder of the Free-Range Kids movement, president of Let Grow, and the woman once labeled "America's Worst Mom" for letting her nine-year-old ride the New York City subway alone.

We're raising what might be the most supervised generation of children in history. Kids are expected to perform academically at younger and younger ages, yet we're increasingly reluctant to let them walk down the street, play outside without an adult, or solve their own problems.

And Lenore believes we're paying a serious price for it.

In this conversation, we explore how parental fear has transformed childhood, why independence is essential for developing confidence and resilience, and why simply taking away our kids' phones won't solve the problem.

We also talk about the surprising research on what kids actually want to do with their free time, how our obsession with safety can create entirely different risks, and what parents can do TODAY to start raising more capable, confident, independent kids.

Because our job isn't to eliminate every possible risk from childhood. It's to raise children who can navigate the world without us.

Resources mentioned:

Let Grow: https://letgrow.org — Free resources and programs to help families and schools give kids more independence.

Lenore's Book: Free Range Kids 

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

Want to know if your kid is an HSK? TAKE THE QUIZ 👇

https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/66676edb5288b4a99ab96f52

Have you ever watched your child completely fall apart over something that seemed incredibly small?

You said "maybe" instead of "yes." Their teacher corrected a spelling mistake. Plans changed. And suddenly, you're dealing with a full-blown meltdown.

It's tempting to think your child needs to toughen up, learn to handle disappointment, or stop being such a perfectionist. But what if you're misunderstanding what's actually happening in their brain?

In this episode of the Whole Parent Podcast, I'm sharing two real conversations from our Parent Lab group coaching sessions about kids who struggle with uncertainty, frustration, and the fear of making mistakes.

We'll talk about why highly sensitive kids can experience seemingly minor disappointments as enormous emotional threats, why what looks like perfectionism might actually be a fear of failure, and how to build real frustration tolerance without dismissing your child's feelings or intentionally overwhelming them.

You'll learn practical strategies for handling the dreaded word "maybe," helping kids become more comfortable with mistakes, giving them the autonomy they desperately need, and teaching them that disappointment isn't something they have to fear.

Because the goal isn't to raise kids who never get frustrated. It's to raise kids who know they can handle frustration when it comes.

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

“You know how to do this, so why can’t you just do it?” That sentence haunts a lot of ADHD kids and the parents who are trying their best. I sit down with Kim and Penn Holderness, award-winning creators and bestselling authors, to name what’s actually missing: executive function, working memory, and the brutal reality that starting can be the hardest step.

We get practical fast. We talk why chores and hygiene can feel harder than creative work, how boredom can feel like physical pain, and how shame builds when adults moralize mess or assume disrespect. Kim and Penn share the thinking behind their playful picture book, Get It Done And Have Fun: ADHD Hacks For Awesome Kids, including how their character Squeaky McGee helps kids feel less alone while learning real strategies.

We also go deeper into the emotional side of ADHD that rarely gets airtime: emotional dysregulation, “flooding,” and how school experiences can shape identity for years. We hold the nuance of “explanation, not excuse,” and why connection before correction changes everything when big feelings hit. Along the way, you’ll hear doable ADHD parenting tools like body doubling, timers, music, reducing friction in the home, and knowing when medication versus behavioral interventions makes sense.

If you’re raising an ADHD child (or realizing you might have ADHD too), this conversation will help you trade blame for understanding and build systems that actually work. Subscribe, share this with a parent who needs it, and leave a review with the one ADHD “stuck point” you want help solving.

Get "Get It Done And Have Fun" HERE 

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

What do you do when your five-year-old won’t stop hitting? Your three-year-old keeps biting? Or your older kid has discovered that getting their younger sibling in trouble is apparently the funniest thing on earth?

For episode 100, I’m doing something different.

I’m bringing you directly into one of my live Parent Lab group coaching calls: real parents, real problems, and my real-time answers.

We talk about why a child who knows not to bite may keep doing it anyway, what to do when one sibling deliberately pushes another sibling’s buttons, why hitting can sometimes be a sign that a child needs a healthier way to experience power and autonomy, and how to respond when sibling teasing finally ends with yogurt smeared across the kitchen.

But underneath all of these questions is one bigger idea:

Your kids are not competitors. They’re teammates.

The goal isn’t just to stop the hitting, biting, teasing, and fighting today. It’s to build the kind of sibling relationship where, decades from now, your kids still know: We’re on the same team.

This is parenting advice for what happens in actual homes, not hypotheticals.

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

Today on the Whole Parent Podcast we bring back friend of the show Dr. Shafali to talk about about why she wrote Raising Conscious Sons and Raising Conscious Daughters right now and why the parenting crisis is being intensified by algorithms that target kids at the level of biology. 

CLICK HERE to get Raising Conscious Sons

CLICK HERE to get Raising Conscious Daughters

We break down what boys and girls are up against and how we can respond with conscious parenting that builds real competence, real safety, and a stronger inner self:

• why a documentary on adolescence triggered two fast-tracked books 
• why parenting is about changing ourselves, not controlling kids 
• how algorithms exploit neurochemistry differently in boys and girls 
• what testosterone drives in boys and how it gets misdirected 
• how social media magnifies perfectionism, comparison, and body dysmorphia in girls 
• why boys go quiet, miss initiation, and get pulled toward the manosphere 
• what healthy rites of passage can look like in modern family life 
• practical tips for young kids: movement for boys, emotional safety for girls 

If it did, there's a couple of things that you can do that would really, really help me out. The first one is to go right now and subscribe to my channel at Whole Parent on YouTube. The second thing that you can do is actually go to the link in the description... find the link for the Parent Lab. The third thing that you can do... is to share this episode or this podcast in general with people in your life. 

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

Watching your kid learn to ride a bike can feel weirdly intense. It looks like a simple childhood skill, but it pokes at something bigger: our fear of seeing our kids struggle, our urge to step in, and the thin line between support and rescue. I sit down with Ryan McFarland, founder of Strider Bikes, to talk about why this milestone is so emotional and why it can shape a child’s confidence far beyond two wheels.

Ryan built the first Strider balance bike in his garage for his two-year-old son, then watched how mobility changed everything: focus, decision making, strength, and that quiet “I can do hard things” energy. We dig into the practical side too, including why so many kids’ bikes are basically shrunken adult bikes that are too heavy, too tall, and too mismatched for short legs. When the gear doesn’t fit, kids don’t just fail, they get scared, and fear can stick.

We also get a little nerdy in the best way about skill development. Balance is the foundation; pedaling is just propulsion. Ryan explains why training wheels can actually teach the wrong steering pattern, making the transition to two wheels feel confusing and risky for thoughtful kids. The parenting takeaway is simple and hard: let learning look like learning. Struggle often means growth is happening. Our job is to be a cheerleader, protect play, and give kids the right-sized challenge so resilience can form naturally.

Get a Strider for YOUR Toddler HERE

If this conversation helps you, subscribe, share it with a parent who needs it, and leave a review so more families can find the show.

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

Denmark shows up near the top of the Happiness Index year after year, yet it is not topping every academic ranking or outspending everyone else. So what is going on? We talk with author, speaker, and cultural researcher Jessica Joelle Alexander about the Danish Way of Parenting and why Danish children are so often described as secure, resilient, and genuinely happy.

We dig into the simplest but most overlooked driver of well being: meaningful relationships. From hygge and “weefulness” to collaboration over comparison, Jessica explains how Danish culture builds connection on purpose and how that changes the way kids handle stress, emotions, and belonging. We also unpack why Denmark treats play as essential learning, why respect based parenting matters, and how empathy becomes something kids live rather than something they memorize.

Then we get practical. Jessica walks us through her PARENT framework (Play, Authenticity, Reframing, Empathy, No Ultimatums, Togetherness) and we wrestle with a uniquely American trap: turning even the healthiest parenting ideas into another achievement badge. Finally, we shift to modern parenting pressure around screens and phones, including Jessica’s digital citizenship conversation cards that help families set values around consent, bullying, critical thinking, communication, and online well being in a calm, in person way.

Get Jessica's Book HERE
Visit her website HERE

Subscribe for more conversations on conscious parenting, child development, emotional safety, and family culture, and if this helped you, share it with a parent who needs it and leave a review. What is one Danish idea you want to try first?

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

This conversation on honest motherhood explains why so many parents feel like they’re disappearing—and what actually helps.

If you’ve ever snapped at your kids, felt crushed by the mental load, or wondered why parenting feels so much harder than everyone else makes it look, this episode with Libby Ward (Diary of an Honest Mom) will hit deeply. We talk about people-pleasing, perfectionism, emotional regulation, childhood trauma, mom guilt, resentment, and the invisible pressure many parents carry every day. Most importantly, we unpack how self-abandonment quietly fuels burnout—and why meeting your own needs is not selfish parenting.

What You’ll Learn:
• Why overwhelmed moms often feel angry, resentful, or emotionally exhausted
• The hidden connection between people-pleasing, burnout, and parenting triggers
• How childhood experiences shape the way we respond to stress, tantrums, and emotional overwhelm
• Why “being a good parent” doesn’t mean ignoring your own needs
• Practical mindset shifts that reduce shame, power struggles, and emotional reactivity

This episode is grounded in developmental psychology, nervous system science, and the real emotional realities of parenting young kids. No perfect-parent messaging. No guilt. Just honest conversations that help parents understand what’s happening beneath the behavior—both in their kids and in themselves.

If you’re tired of second-guessing yourself, carrying the entire mental load, or feeling like you’re failing during hard moments, this channel is here to help parenting feel calmer, clearer, and more manageable—one small shift at a time.

Libby Ward’s book “Honest Motherhood”

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...

In this conversation, parenting coach Mary Van Geffen explains why “spicy kids” don’t respond to traditional discipline—and what actually helps instead.

If your child refuses to listen, melts down over small things, pushes back on everything, or seems emotionally intense all day long, this episode will help you understand what’s really happening beneath the behavior. We talk about emotional regulation, ADHD and PDA traits, shame cycles, demand avoidance, connection vs. control, and why some kids need a completely different parenting approach. This is a grounded, practical conversation for overwhelmed parents who are exhausted by yelling, punishment, and constant conflict—and want calmer, more connected ways to parent without losing authority.

What You’ll Learn:
• Why strong-willed and deeply feeling kids often resist traditional discipline
• How shame, punishment, and power struggles make behavior worse
• What “connection over control” actually looks like in real life
• Practical ways to reduce meltdowns, increase cooperation, and stay calm under pressure
• How to parent explosive, sensitive, ADHD, PDA, or demand-avoidant kids without walking on eggshells

This episode blends developmental psychology, neuroscience, and real-world parenting tools in a way that’s actually usable when you’re in the middle of hard moments. The focus isn’t on “perfect parenting.” It’s on understanding behavior more deeply so you can respond with clarity, confidence, and connection—even when your child is intense, reactive, or hard to reach.

If you’ve been second-guessing yourself, wondering why typical parenting advice isn’t working, or feeling stuck in daily battles with your toddler or preschooler, this channel is here to help parenting feel lighter, calmer, and more doable—one hard moment at a time.

Check out Mary Van Geffen's book: Parenting a Spicy One

Send us Fan Mail

Support the show

If parenting has felt hard lately… you don’t have to figure it out alone.

Inside The Parent Lab, I’ll help you understand what’s actually going on underneath your child’s behavior — and give you simple, in-the-moment tools that actually work in real life.

You’ll get access to my full course library, live coaching calls with me, practical workshops, and our 21-Day Sibling Challenge designed to help reduce the fighting and build better relationships between your kids.

If you want support, tools, and a clear plan instead of just guessing your way through parenting… come join us inside The Parent Lab.

CLICK HERE to Try the Parent Lab Today

Other Links to help you and me:

• Get Jon’s Book Punishment-Free Parenting 
• Preorder Jon’s Children’s Book Set My Feelings Free
• Follow Whole Parent on 
  • Instagram, 
  • Tiktok, 
  • Facebook,...