Therapist Uncensored Podcast

By Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP & Ann Kelley PhDSociety & Culture Science Social Sciences Education Self-Improvement Relationships

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Therapist Uncensored Podcast episodes

November 30, 2018 TU 84: Why Do We Over (or Under) React? The Neurobiological Underpinnings of Attachment Categories
Neurobiological differences can be detected between secure and insecure relating, and even between the two organized insecure patterns of attachment (Dismissing and Preoccupied)! Cool, huh!?
In this Therapist Uncensored episode, co-hosts and real therapists Dr. Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP begin to the question – why are there only 3-4 categories established in the largest body of attachment research given the zillions of different experiences across the globe? We point to the neuroscience behind our attachment strategies that limit our biology in responding to stress and threat.
This is cool because we can understand it and begin to gain mastery over our primitive reactions (& help regulate those close to us – quite a perk!).
As always, we love to hearing from you! Uncensor you feedback, comments & discussion – get in touch, or better yet, leave us a live Voicemail that we can respond to by clicking the side button on our website (add your email to enable us to message back)!
In this episode, TU84, we discuss:
What is social engagement and what is the neuroscience behind it?
The role of Oxytocin in positive interaction seeking behaviour
Discrepancies in how information gets encoded between different partners can lead to difficulties with couples, especially with how future social information is encoded
The link between attachment and threat
The role of re-appraisal & neuroception
The difference between emotional and cognitive mentalization
How mentalization looks across the attachment spectrum
Join the Conversation
We primarily use Facebook and Twitter (@austinshrinks)
This week’s question (for our private online Facebook group – join here if you are a neuronerd and would like interesting, supportive, non-solicitive engagement with other neuronerds!)
Question: What 1-2 specific take-aways did you get from this episode? (ie. What do you want to remember or for other people to be sure to hear?)
Explore these Resources from this episode:
Neuroscience of Social Interaction and Adult Attachment Style – GREAT article!
The Neurobiology of Infant Attachments – a list of articles
Neurobiology of Social Interactions – for true nerds
Liked this episode? Then you’ll probably enjoy this one, too Establishing Neurological Safety Through Relationships with Guest Bonnie Badenoch.
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56 min
November 06, 2018 TU83: Establishing Neurological Safety through Relationships with Guest Bonnie Badenoch
53 min
October 24, 2018 TU82: The Paradox of Masculinity with Guest Esther Perel
30 min
October 17, 2018 TU81: How Good Boundaries Actually Bring Us Closer, with Guest Juliane Taylor Shore
Interpersonal co-regulation requires boundary setting. Most of us haven’t been lucky enough to learn to be good at boundary setting naturally, by good examples, so we have to literally be taught how to do this important skill. Well today we are in luck! Jello will be your friend. 🙂
Therapist Uncensored co-hosts Ann Kelley and Sue Marriott join the founder of IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin, Dr. Juliane Taylor Shore, in a discussion on interpersonal neurobiology and how it relates to boundaries. We’ll explore the three types of boundaries, how to co-create boundaries and how to stay regulated using internal mechanisms. After this podcast, you may very well be on your way towards building your own “Jello wall” and better co-regulating yourself when you’re overwhelmed!
0:00-25:00
Some background on Juliane Taylor Shore: Founder of IPNB Psychotherapy of Austin with interests in interpersonal neurobiology, neuroscience, philosophy, biology and physics.
How are boundaries defined and what sort of connotations come with boundaries? How can the connection between boundaries and interpersonal neurobiology actually bring people closer?
The Three Types of Boundaries
External, Behavioral Boundary: “I don’t want to talk to you when you raise your voice at me.” Or “I’d love to see you but I can’t right now.” The concept of having to say “no”.
Psychological Boundary: separation between people, difference between true self and parts of self (“air” between people, your truth and my truth are allowed to be different) “Jello Wall”
Containing Boundary: (individually deeming what’s okay leading up to healthy shame) Boundary that stops you from acting out.
Co-creating boundaries between two people is a great way to negotiate disagreements and find a middle ground.
“Fucked up people will try to tell you otherwise, but boundaries have nothing to do with whether you love someone or not. They are not punishments, judgments or betrayals. They’re a purely peaceable thing. The basic principles you identify for yourself that define the behaviors you will tolerate from others, as well as the responses you will have to those behaviors. Boundaries teach people how to treat you and they teach you how to respect yourself.” – Cheryl Strayed (Author of Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail)
“Jello wall”: Stop and slow down all the input coming towards you so you can ask, “Is this true or not true?” and “If it is, is this about me or not about me?” This allows you to view the world around you without getting hurt. Allows you space to reflect and be in your own system.
The differences between the logical left brain and abstract right brain influence how they connect neural networks. Healthy shame is important to not beat one’s self up over establishing boundaries.
Using young ones and animals to teach your inner protector parts to have a better containing boundary, relieving trauma by talking to your young self (you at four, sixteen, etc.) rather than beating your present self up.
25:00-50:00
Exploring the connection between attachment and interpersonal neurobiology.
The anticipation of threat before setting a boundary and connecting to something after getting overwhelmed so that it’s part of your life narrative and not something that keeps popping up.
The individual nervous system isn’t meant to survive being alone after trauma but we need co-regulatory nervous systems AND you can be your own co-regulatory system.
You can start by building up your relationship with yourself and learning to trust your internal voices, neural networks or other people.
Examples working through the three types of boundaries; Co-creating a boundary with a spouse over lack of communication. Turning down a panicked client when you’re totally booked. Having uncomfortable physical contact with an older family member when saying good...
51 min
October 04, 2018 TU:80 Nervous Systems in the News: Dr. Blasey Ford, Sexual Trauma Stories and the Power of Patriarchy
We joke around a lot on this show, but when it hits the fan we are serious therapists devoted to treating real people and all kinds of survivors. Today we give our best guess on they science behind why people are responding overwhelmingly to Dr. Ford's testimony - calling national and local crisis hotlines in unprecedented numbers. We speak in this moment not from a political perspective, but from a somatic, nervous system perspective. Something has stirred in the American public even different than the #MeToo movement, and we speak to it on this episode.
We also touch on the science of memory, implicit and explicit, mirror neurons, stress hormones and threat responses and most importantly the power of patriarchy to harm both women and men, both political parties and our democracy as we know it.
25 min
October 02, 2018 TU79: Attachment Spectrum and the Nervous System, Quick Review with Updates
A guide to secure relating and using the attachment sciences and regulation theory to improve your understanding of yourself and others in your day to day lives. Today we review what we've discussed so far on the podcast about the attachment spectrum and add more detail about the nervous system.
28 min
September 26, 2018 TU78: The Stress Response System (Attachment) Across the Lifespan – (Replay)
FAVORITE EPISODE!!! This one takes a wide-angle look at attachment throughout one’s life, discusses how one’s environment affects their system’s involuntary response to stress, and how that stress response system impacts us from infancy to the autumn years. In this episode, co-hosts Ann Kelley Phd and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP discuss attachment across the lifespan, specifically looking at the elder years and how our attachment system affects us as caretakers of our parents or as the senior who may be undergoing the various losses inherent in aging.
33 min
September 11, 2018 TU77: Understanding the Mind with Guest Dr. Dan Siegel (Replay)
59 min
August 30, 2018 TU76: Behind the Scenes with Ann and Sue, Reflections and a Look Ahead
Sue and Ann walk the walk by bringing authenticity and vulnerability to their listeners and seeking connection, engagement and feedback. They also request listener feedback and input to help them co-create an exciting and high quality Season 3 of Therapist Uncensored.
11 min
August 22, 2018 TU 74: Mentalizing – A Critical Component For Secure Relating With Tina Adkins (replay)
Mentalizing seems easy – but actually it is quite complex. Thinking accurately about our own and others minds is such a core skill that many consider it a pre-condition for self-soothing, empathy and other facets of emotional intelligence and social-emotional maturity.
49 min

About Therapist Uncensored Podcast

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Ranked as one of Apple’s Top 10 Social Science podcasts, Therapist Uncensored delivers trusted, science-backed insights on mental health and secure relationships. With over 11 million downloads…