My guests this week are Dr. Ted Brodkin and Ashley Pallathra, authors of the recent book Missing Each Other (affiliate link), which is about finding social attunement. I really enjoyed this discussion, where we explored the benefits of greater connection during our interactions with others, and how we can cultivate that connection.

My guest this week is my brother, Malachi Gillihan. He’s currently doing graduate work in east-west psychology, studying the intersection of trauma and spirituality. So we talked a lot about that connection (which builds on my conversation with Jonah Paquette in last week’s episode). We also got into issues like Steve Porges’s polyvagal theory, the harsh self-judgments we often make after trauma, and what it means to say yes to all of life. It hope you find our discussion to be helpful.

I’m very pleased this week to have Dr. Jonah Paquette back on the podcast for a second time. Jonah is the author of an excellent book called Awestruck (affiliate link), which we talked a lot about in our first conversation. This time we focused on a couple of main topics. The first was trauma, and especially posttraumatic growth. We explored the question of whether there is any contradiction between the pain and confusion of trauma, and the possibility that we can grow from our most difficult experiences—and even become more fully ourselves.

We then turned to the issue of liberal orthodoxy and the cancel culture, and ways we might have more open and productive dialogues. There’s a lot of interesting nuance to discuss there.

I have two important and enjoyable conversations to share with you this week. Both are about finding greater unity and harmony in our political conversations, even when we hold very different views.

Tim Payton and Douglass Teschner are both to the right of me on the political spectrum, but we share a lot of similar values, and a deep concern about the corrosive division in our country. I really appreciate the perspective that each of my guests brings. The biggest overarching theme in this episode is listening to understand.

My guest this week is Dr. Joel Minden, who’s been on the podcast twice before (check out episode 21 and epidose 87). I always enjoy talking with Joel, who has such a wealth of knowledge about treating anxiety and depression. We thought together again about the most effective way to approach these conditions, especially the question of how much we try to change our emotions versus making peace with them, and focusing on doing what’s important to us.

As always, Joel does a really nice job at striking a compassionate balance between understanding the difficulty in doing things that are important to us when we're struggling, while also encouraging us not to make emotions the enemy or let them define what we can and can't do. I’ll look forward to your thoughts about this conversation.

My guest this week is Dr. Jason Ong, who specializes in the treatment of sleep disorders. I’ve wanted to have Jason on the podcast for a while now because he’s done some really pioneering work in applying mindfulness to the treatment of insomnia. If you struggle with getting sound sleep sometimes, which so many of us do, Jason has a lot to say about the most effective ways to get better sleep.

My guest this week is my friend and fellow psychologist Dr. Mitch Greene, who was on the podcast way back on episode 28. I love talking with Mitch, and this conversation was no exception. We focused on the mental health challenges we’re facing related to COVID and the shutdowns, including for the many athletes that Mitch works with in his sport psychology practice. I’m guessing you’ll find a lot you can relate to in this discussion.

My guest this week is Mark Gregory Karris. We discussed his recent book, Religious Refugees, which describes the process so many of us will go through of losing our faith, and needing to reconstruct it in a new way. Mark is intimately familiar with this process having gone through it himself, and he guides other religious refugees as they wrestle with issues of faith.

Mark and I had a lot of overlap in our backgrounds, having left fundamentalist Christian denominations, and also a shared history of speaking in tongues which we talked about. We also talked a lot about the love of God, which is sadly missing in so many people’s religious experience, and how to shift our unhelpful beliefs.

I have a different kind of discussion for you this week. My guests are my brother, Timothy Gillihan, and my mom, Carolyn Gillihan. I invited them on to talk about their political differences, which came up recently in the aftermath of the 2020 presidential election. I want to do what I can to promote civil dialogue, and this conversation is one step in that direction. For full disclosure in where I stand, I’m registered as an Independent and I voted for Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, though I’m a neutral third party in this discussion.

My guest this week is Blake D. Bauer, author of the bestselling book, You Were Not Born to Suffer. I was really struck as I read this book by how similar many of Blake’s ideas are to the way that I see human nature. His main focus is on loving ourselves deeply, and what that means in practical terms. We also explored how denying our needs can lead to physical and emotional distress, and why we need to give ourselves permission to be well and happy. I hope you take a lot from our discussion.