This Whole Life

“The loveliest masterpiece of the heart of God is the heart of a mother.”
~ St. Thérèse of Lisieux

The arrival of a child is an unspeakable gift and a grace for which to be thankful. But there can also be deeply painful moments during pregnancy and after the baby arrives. Millions of mothers know the hardship of postpartum depression, anxiety, distance from their spouse, disappointment, difficulty nursing, and the resulting shame. Is there anything we can do in the middle of such big, and sometimes surprising, challenges?

Dr. Lyndsey Day joins Kenna for a beautiful and deeply real conversation about the mental health challenges associated with pregnancy and the postpartum months. Dr. Day's faith allows her to journey with women as an OB-GYN in a way that is a ministry and a mission for the good of mothers and families. She and Kenna discuss the reasons that the postpartum period is so difficult, impactful options for offering healing & support to mothers, and the impossible expectations that women so often feel. Join us for an encouraging and consoling conversation that is hand-made for all mothers & those who love them!

Dr. Lyndsey Day received her Bachelor of Science degree in Biology with a minor in Chemistry from Saint Ambrose University and her medical degree from the University of Iowa. She completed her residency in Obstetrics and Gynecology at Loyola University Medical Center just outside of Chicago, Illinois. Dr. Day has a passion for women's healthcare and thoroughly enjoys providing obstetric and gynecologic care to women throughout all phases of life. Dr. Day loves to garden and hike and be with her family. Dr. Day's husband and 6 children fill her life with much joy, many trips to Costco, a fair amount of life experience, a small menagerie that the kids are constantly trying to add to (currently includes 4 cats and a golden retriever), and so very much love.

Episode 45 Show Notes

For more information on help for postpartum depression, including support groups, visit postpartumdepression.org

Get ready for our book study on The Love That Keeps Us Sane by Fr. Marc Foley, OCD: order your copy here

Chapters:
00:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
11:24: OB-GYN medicine as a ministry
21:10: Dealing with disappointment in parenthood
26:47: Postpartum mood disorders
36:53: The place for medication & Giving yourself grace
50:24: Surrendering to God's will
53:58: Challenge By Choice

Questions for Reflection & Discussion:

1. What is one thing that stuck out to you from this episode?
2. Mothers, what was your pregnancy and postpartum experience like? What were the greatest joys and struggles?
3. What are some of the unfair expectations that mothers feel? What contributes to these expectations?
4. Why do so many mothers feel shame about their postpartum struggles? How can you help alleviate that shame and help mothers feel free to share their burdens?
5. What are some tangible ways that you can show support and care for the mothers that you know, especially mothers who have recently given birth?

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Join our email list and never miss an episode or an event

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"This is how all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."
~ John 13:35

It's time to be honest: we all have people in our lives that we don't particularly enjoy. Their personality or quirks might rub us the wrong way, or maybe we don't agree with their opinions or choices. They're not necessarily bad people, we just don't like being around them. And while we're being honest, we can also admit that we can be difficult to deal with ourselves. So what do we do, as Christians, when we don't like someone?

Pat & Fr. Nathan LaLiberte take on a heartfelt exploration of dealing with difficult people. They embrace the struggle of relatable hardships with family members, coworkers, and neighbors in a blend of faith, mental health, and the quest for constant charity and authentic joy. In drawing important distinctions between love and "liking" someone, and between kindness and "niceness", they highlight the Christian obligation to love challenging individuals. Don't miss this opportunity to gain a fresh perspective on loving difficult people, and to embrace authenticity and patience in the process!

Episode 44 Show Notes

Chapters:
0:00: Intro & This or That?
17:01: Defining "difficult people"
23:02: Christian love vs. "liking" someone
28:51: Examples of Jesus dealing with difficult people
39:42: Real life situations & choosing love
54:03: Challenge By Choice

Questions for Reflection & Discussion:

1. What is one thing that stuck out to you from this episode?
2. Being careful to avoid gossip or detraction, when have you found it difficult to be around someone? What did you recognize about yourself in that situation?
3. What are the differences between liking someone and loving them? How does the Christian understanding of these ideas differ from the world's understanding?
4. When have you been a difficult person in someone else's life? How might reflecting on those times help you grow in patience and mercy toward others?
5. Who is someone that you find it difficult to relate to right now? In what tangible ways can you love them by choosing their good?

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"Pure love is capable of great deeds, and it is not broken by difficulty or adversity."
~ St. Faustina

Do you have the same arguments over and over again? Are you frustrated by a lack of connection in your relationship? Is it possible to still be connected when you disagree with the person you love?

In this episode, Kenna and Pat Millea explore the transformative power of prioritizing Process over Content in communication and relationships. They delve into the significance of empathy and vulnerability in fostering genuine connection, especially during times of hardship or conflict. Through personal anecdotes from their own marriage, Kenna and Pat demonstrate the healing potential of empathy and authenticity in a relationship. The truth is that our arguments aren't really about the content: the thing that happened or what someone said. On a deeper level, our conflicts are about the process: how we were affected, and how badly we desire to be loved, known, and understood, even in times of conflict.

Join Pat & Kenna for a fun and fruitful episode and take the next step toward conflict that connects!

Episode 43 Show Notes

Chapters:
00:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
13:52: Empathy creates connection
22:24: Process over Content
28:59: Fostering connection by focusing on Process
41:15: Challenge By Choice

Questions for Reflection & Discussion:

1. What is one thing that is sticking with you from this episode?
2. What is a time that someone has truly empathized with you and worked to understand your feelings? How did that make you feel?
3. When have you fallen into the trap of prioritizing being "right" over fostering understanding and connection in a conflict? How might a focus on Process over Content have led to a different outcome?
4. When is it most tempting to get bogged down in content? How can you focus on process instead?
5. What is a first step you can make to prioritizing process over content moving forward?

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Join our email list and never miss an episode or an event

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?"
~ 1 Corinthians 6:19

"Why isn't my body different?"
"Why did God give me this particular body?"
"What if I feel frustrated by, or even hate, my own body?"

All of us have feelings & questions about the bodies that God has given us, and sometimes those feelings can become deep experiences of sadness, disgust, or shame; especially in a culture that idolizes only some appearances & body types. In this episode of This Whole Life, Kenna invites Megan Lawrence, LAMFT in that tender and crucial conversation to help shed light on the dark places of struggles with body image. Drawing on Megan's personal and clinical experience with eating disorders, they reflect on the meaning and purpose of the human body as God's gift for the good of his children. And informed by St. John Paul II's Theology of the Body, they propose a stance of non-judgment as a path toward acceptance of your body as the beautiful and definitive gift that it is.

Megan is a Licensed Associate Marriage and Family Therapist who holds a Master's Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from the University of Nebraska - Lincoln.  Megan approaches therapy through an attachment-based, trauma-informed lens, and is trained in EMDR.  She has specific experience within eating disorder recovery. Megan received bachelor degrees in Studio Art, Printmaking and Drawing, and Art History from Drake University.  While serving four years as a missionary with the Fellowship of Catholic University Students (FOCUS), Megan's passion deepened for accompanying others on their healing journey. She enjoys exploring art museums, thrift stores, and the outdoors.

Episode 42 Show Notes

If you or someone you love may be struggling with an eating disorder, please reach out for support. The National Eating Disorders Association is a great place to start.

Chapters:
0:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
10:45: Understanding body image & eating disorders
26:36: The power of the Theology of the Body
39:15: Gratitude for the body & acceptance of the body
50:08: Challenge By Choice

Questions for Reflection & Discussion:

1. What is one thing that is sticking with you from this episode?
2. What feelings do you have about discussing body image & your own body?
3. When have you had a difficult time seeing your body as a good & valuable gift from God? What experiences led to those difficulties?
4. Do you see the value of your body in its appearance (the way it looks), in its function (in what it can do), or as a gift (the simple fact that God gave it to you)?
5. How does God see & value your body? What do you imagine God wants you to know about your body?

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Join our email list and never miss an episode or an event

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"...and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us."
~ Romans 5:5

So much of human life is marked by shame and guilt. We feel the weight of our mistakes, sins, and failures. Shame and guilt are both difficult to feel, but are they both bad? Do they serve a purpose? Do they drive us closer to God or farther from Him?

In episode 41 of This Whole Life, Fr. Nathan LaLiberte returns for a conversation that delves deep into the themes of shame, guilt, and our personal struggles with them. Together with Pat & Kenna, they reflect on the Biblical roots of shame and guilt and the ways that they each affect our spiritual lives & relationships. The discussion also touches on the factors that contribute to shame, the antidotes to shame, and the place that guilt holds in a healthy spiritual life. Despite the weighty topics around self-talk and self-condemnation, the episode is punctuated with lighthearted banter and humor, as you are invited to explore your internal monologue and to begin overcoming shame.

Episode 41 Show Notes

Chapters:
0:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
15:52: The origin & roots of shame
20:29: The ingredients of shame
24:49: The antidotes to shame
33:58: The value of guilt
42:53: Examples of shame vs. guilt
48:15: Challenge By Choice

Discussion & reflection questions:

1. How do you distinguish between shame and guilt?
2. Reflect on a time when you experienced shame and how it affected your self-image. What steps have you taken to address these emotions and move towards healing?
3. Consider the difference between guilt and shame in your own life. How do these experiences show up in your thoughts and actions? 
4. Explore the impact of internal dialogue on your emotions, behaviors, and relationships. How can recognizing and reshaping negative self-talk contribute to a healthier sense of self-worth and compassion for others?
5. When was a time that you brought a fear or humiliation into the light and shared it with another? What was the result of that process? What did you learn from it?
   
   

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"My friends, if anyone is detected in a transgression, you who have received the Spirit should restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness. Take care that you yourselves are not tempted."
~ Galatians 6:1

Why is it so tempting to speak harshly to the people that we love most in the world? How do we overcome this habit and speak with the gentleness that comes from the Holy Spirit?

In this final installment of their four-part series on Dr. John Gottman's 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse for relationships, Kenna and Pat discuss Criticism. They delve into the importance of clear behavioral requests, replacing criticism with positive interactions, and the concept of a "gentle startup" as the antidote to criticism in relationships & marriages. Drawing from their own experiences, they emphasize the detrimental effects of criticism on emotional connection and vulnerability. This episode offers an insightful and heartfelt exploration of emotional connection, personal growth, and the impact of communication dynamics in relationships - not to mention a heated discussion about popular musicians.

Join Pat & Kenna as they close their series on the 4 Horsemen, and get ready to embrace a more connected and joyful relationship!

Episode 40 Show Notes

Check out the first 3 episodes of the 4 Horsemen series:
Episode 14: Defeating Defensiveness
Episode 18: Tearing Down Walls & Building A Connected Marriage (on Stonewalling)
Episode 30: Conquering Contempt

Chapters:
00:00: Intro & a new music-related game
18:22: Highs & Hards
27:42: Explaining Criticism, the last of the Four Horsemen for relationships
42:03: The antidote to Criticism
50:09: Challenge By Choice

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Join our email list and never miss an episode or an event

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom."
~ 2 Corinthians 3:17

How often do we hear that someone is "obsessed" with a new show or that they keep a clean home because they're "a little OCD"? The reality is that the burden of OCD weighs heavily on millions of people who suffer with this disorder, and on those who love them. How can we understand OCD and its effects on faith? And, even more importantly, how can we support those who are working on healing from OCD - or seek help and support ourselves?

In Episode 39 of "This Whole Life," Kenna welcomes Dr. Katherine Posch, a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and anxiety disorders. They tackle the complexities of OCD and its terrible cycle. Dr. Posch emphasizes evidence-based treatments, including Exposure and Response Prevention therapy, and offers a hope-filled way forward for those struggling with religious OCD or scrupulosity. Through personal experiences and professional expertise, the episode offers hope, understanding, and practical guidance for those impacted by OCD - and for all of us who can be stuck in a place of fear and anxiety. Freedom is real and possible!

Katherine Posch, Psy.D., LP is a licensed clinical psychologist at  Renew Behavioral Health in Minneapolis, Minnesota. She is a graduate of the University of Texas at Austin and earned her Doctor of Psychology in Clinical Psychology from Baylor University. She completed a clinical internship at George E. Wahlen Veterans Hospital in Salt Lake City, Utah and a Postdoctoral Fellowship in PCBH/Health Psychology at Hennepin Healthcare Medical Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
Find out more about Katherine's work at renewbehavioralmn.com.

Episode 39 Show Notes

The International OCD Foundation & their provider directory

Chapters:
0:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
15:17: What is OCD?
26:15: Treating OCD & discovering hope
39:19: Approaching OCD related to faith & religious practice
47:51: Supporting a loved one struggling with OCD
53:45: Challenge By Choice

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Join our email list and never miss an episode or an event

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

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Description

Episode 39 Show Notes

Chapters

Thank you for listening! Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Check us out on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him."
~ Colossians 3:17

Marriage and family life is a beautiful, romantic, sacramental vocation. And in the midst of that vocation, spouses also need to deal with finances, schedules, meal plans, parenting, budgets, and to-do lists. How are we supposed to maintain an organized home and family while being connected to each other in love & faithfulness?
 
In Episode 38, Kenna and Pat invite listeners into the concept of Family Meetings — a deliberate practice that allows couples to navigate their roles and responsibilities, as well as support their shared values and goals. With wisdom and practical tips, they discuss the benefits and structure of their Family Meetings, offering valuable advice for listeners seeking intentional living and unity within their families. Through prayer, reflection, and concrete planning, family meetings can be transformative in fostering a deeper, more purposeful connection within the home.

Episode 38 Show Notes

Click to download your Family Meeting Agenda template

Chapters
00:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
10:21: The value of family meetings
20:27: The practicals that support our values
29:29: The Family Meeting Agenda
40:44: Takeaways from the family meeting
43:25: Challenge By Choice

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Join our email list and never miss an episode or an event

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.

"Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."
~ Colossians 3:13

In the prayer that Jesus gave us, we hear: "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us." We pray these words so often that we can overlook how challenging, and even unpopular, we find the reality of forgiveness. We have all been hurt by others, sometimes in profound and life-altering ways. Why would Jesus command us to do something as difficult - maybe even irrational - as forgiving?

In episode 37 of "This Whole Life", Kenna and Pat Millea delve into the complexities of forgiveness with Fr. Nathan LaLiberte. Together, they explore the spiritual, emotional, and psychological freedom that forgiveness brings, emphasizing its importance for personal wholeness and healthy relationships. The conversation touches on the challenges of seeking and offering forgiveness, the difference between forgiveness and reconciliation, and the significance of self-forgiveness. Drawing from Christian truths and psychological perspectives, the episode offers insights into the transformative power of forgiveness, emphasizing the ongoing process of releasing resentment and embracing personal freedom. Begin or continue your path toward freedom and healing with this impactful conversation!

Episode 37 Show Notes

Chapters:
0:00: Introduction and Highs & Hards
10:07: Forgiveness is essential
25:30: Practical approaches to forgiveness
37:15: HOW do I forgive?
47:09: How can I forgive myself?
51:53: Challenge By Choice

Support the show

Thank you for listening, and a very special thank you to our community of supporters!

Visit us online at thiswholelifepodcast.com, and send us an email with your thoughts, questions, or ideas.

Follow us on Instagram & Facebook

Interested in more faith-filled mental health resources? Check out the Martin Center for Integration

Music: "You're Not Alone" by Marie Miller. Used with permission.