TONTS.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to grow up in a secretive Christian sect? And what happens if you leave? My guest today Laura Conti has done just that and not only left but thrived. Her story is one of fierce tenacity, feminist principles and the power of a good education. More than that though, what I admire most about Laura's story is her bravery in telling her truth and how speaking out can set you free. The sect she grew up in is called The Truth and is highly secretive with members across Australia, the USA and the EU. Former members of The Truth confirm the group hold fundamentalist Christian beliefs, where TV, movies, dancing, drinking, smoking, swearing, and gambling is described as the “devil’s work”. Women are expected to dress modestly and wear their long, uncut hair pinned in a bun; they are not allowed to follow current fashion trends, or wear makeup or jewellery. Men must have their hair cut short. Only “Workers” are allowed to marry outside of The Truth, and according to former member Elizabeth Coleman, “Children in the sect are told that if they stray, bad things will happen – a lightning strike, for example, being hit by a runaway bus, or an illness.”

Laura was a joy to talk to you and I can't wait for you to hear this episode.

For more from Laura and to purchase some #gokindly beautiful bedding you can head to https://www.gokindly.com.au/

If you or anyone you know is experiencing family violence or homelessness please reach out to the following organisations:

24 HOUR FAMILY VIOLENCE SERVICE - SAFE STEPS  1800 015 18824 HOUR HOMELESSNESS SERVICE  1800 825 955

Berry Street

Juno

Womens Housing Ltd

Launch Housing

And if this episode brought anything up for you at all please reach out to someone you trust or to Lifeline on 13 11 14

You can find me at @clairetonti on instagram or at www.clairetonti.com and subscribe to my newsletter here

As always thank you to RAW Collings for editing this week's episode.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This conversation you’re about to hear today is with an old friend of mine who I met through volunteering with kids from tricky back grounds, taking them on camps over the school holidays. This is actually inadvertently how I met my husband man James too but that’s a story for another day. Sandeep Varma is someone I've always admired for his intelligence, tenacity, positivity and kindness. He is someone who knows a lot about advocacy, especially in helping young people and children in his work as a lawyer. Deep also knows about shifting the way we think, about mindsets, changing the way we think about masculinity and the value of aligning your work with your values. Sandeep is a Dad to two little humans who is also the founder and CEO of SAARI Collective a media start up and community for South Asian Australians. He is passionate about amplifying South Asian voices, building community, anti-racism and delivering social change. He has worked across so many sectors with roles such as a speechwriter, lawyer, leader and advocate for children’s rights. Deep is also the board chair at 100 Story Building, a social enterprise for young creative writers and in all his spare time is also the four time Australian Chilli cooking champion for his famous chilli con carne. Settle in for a lovely wide ranging conversation I dare you to not be inspired by Sandeep Varma.

Links discussed in today's episode:

Man Enough with Justin Baldoni

Dr Kristen Neff

The Artist's Way Morning Pages with Julia Cameron

For more from Sandeep you can head to Saaricollective.com.au 

And you can find me at @clairetonti on instagram or at www.clairetonti.com or subscribe to my newsletter here

As always thank you to RAW Collings for editing this week's episode.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today I am joined by Dr Yves Rees. They are a La Trobe University historian, a podcaster, radio broadcaster and now an author of the brilliant, paradigm shifting memoir All About Yves. Yves' book is searing and articulate, bringing to the fore with real clarity and insight what it was like for them to identify as trans. This book and their story is I think, really going to make a difference to so many people in both being able to articulate their own identity and also build empathy in people who haven’t had to examine their own gender or sexuality. Spliced with anecdotes from the history of trans people and vivid moments in Yves own life I really recommend you get yourself a copy of this wonderful memoir and settle in for a fascinating chat about gender, identity, history and finding the magic parts of yourself that perhaps even you didn’t realise were there. Yves encourages us to live the questions and I couldn’t agree more. 

For more from Yves you can head to their website www.yvesrees.com or purchase a copy of All About Yves here

And you can find me at @clairetonti on instagram or at www.clairetonti.com or subscribe to my newsletter here

As always thank you to RAW Collings for editing this week's episode.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Were you a weird kid? Did you love things almost too much? Ask too many questions? Feel like a fish out of water at school? Were you lonely or awkward or felt out of place in your own skin? Well my guest today is an example of what happens when you let all of that pour out, follow your curiosities and compulsions. When you give yourself permission to be fully who you were meant to be. I have a real treat for you today. This episode of Tonts is a wide reaching lovely conversation with the force of nature that is Alice Zaslavsky or Alice in Frames as she is known around the traps. Alice is a former teacher who is also a cook, writer, broadcaster and speaker who is also deeply passionate about vegetables. She is a polymath (someone who collects knowledge like a bower bird), a vegelante and just an all round creative wonder who loves nothing more than to inspire others to learn about food and where it comes from. I have loved Alice’s writing and her recipes for years and have always wanted to sit down with her and ask her about all the things she makes and why she does what she does. Alice is also a mum to a little human called Hazel and the story of her Jewish family’s immigration from Georgia to Australia is one of heartbreak and triumph and grit. It was a delight to sit down on a sunny afternoon in lockdown and discover a kindred spirit. The weird, nerdy kid that lives inside my head and my heart was full to the brim with joy for this vegetable loving woman. Her message is clear be you and don’t let anyone tell you differently and maybe some magic things will happen. Give yourself permission. Lean into what you love. And for goodness sake eat your vegetables.

For more from Alice head to www.aliceinframes.com or follow her on instagram @aliceinframes

Head here to purchase her vegtastic tome In Praise of Veg

Subscribe here for – tontsnewsletter

You can find me on instagram @clairetonti or at www.clairetonti.com

You can email me with suggestions for episode topics and guests to [email protected]. Feel free to leave me a voice memo to be included in the show.

A big thank you to this wonderful team:

Editing - RAWCollings

Theme Music - Avocado Junkie

Graphic Design - Emma Hackett

Photography - Anna Robinson

Styling - Hilary Holmes

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome to TONTS a podcast about feeling all of it. About the stories we are told about who we are. My guest this week is Charlie Clausen. Co-host of the beloved aussie podcast Tofop, actor in shows including Blue Heelers and Home and Away, Charlie is also a writer and producer working in partnership with his wife, director Gemma Lee. He is also Dad to one small human Iona and that’s what I wanted to ask him about today. Charlie hosts a podcast called Dadpod with Osher Gunsberg. The last time I sat down to talk to Charlie for my podcast Just Make The Thing we covered his life story and the story of his wonderful mum Eileen who passed away from cancer. If you’d like to listen to our chat there is a link in the show notes below. Today we talk about working and parenting and what it means to be getting older and grappling with life changing under our feet.

For more from me you can head to www.clairetonti.com or @clairetonti on instagram

For more from Charlie you can check out Tofop and Dadpod on all good podcast apps or head to www.tofop.com

Fofop with Claire and Charlie

Just Make The Thing with Charlie Clausen

Thanks you as always to RAW Collings for editing this episode.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Today my guest is Daniel Steele who is a primary school teacher, basketball aficionado, Dad of two little humans and the brains behind the wonderful website Upgrade Think Learn. Dan is an old friend of mine and a legend of a bloke who also happens to be a vice principal at a school by the beach in the outer suburbs of Melbourne. He is also a writer and chock full of enthusiasm and creativity. I rang Dan one night after home schooling all day to pick his brains about a worry that many parents and myself had shared about how our kids are going missing so much school. What he had to say made me really think and also allowed me to get some perspective on all of it and realise that more important than how our kids will go academically is how they actually are in themselves. Dan made me think about what we can do to help them and us through this really tricky time and reminded me that as always prioritising our mental health, how we feel in our heads and hearts will ultimately be the thing that gets us through. That being said this week I’m leaning into getting more sleep, drinking water and getting out each day for a walk or a run. It’s simple but whenever life gets tough I always think those seem to be the first things to go. When I’m spiralling into a really bad head space I run that mental checklist. Have I had water today? Have I eaten? Did I sleep? Have I exercised? It’s amazing how many problems seems more manageable if we’ve done those things. Also side note to any teachers out there thank you, you are on the front lines, are often the one consistent face parents and families are seeing each day and you are so valued. Thank you for showing up for us, our kids and our communities.

Links:

ABC Education

Reading Eggs

The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown

Berry Street Education Model

You’ve been listening to a podcast by me Claire Tonti and this week with Daniel Steele. For more from Dan you can find him at https://upgradethinklearn.com/

And for more from me you can head to my website www.clairetonti.com or on Instagram @clairetonti

Thank you as always to RAW Collings for editing this episode and if you’d like to contact the show you can email me at [email protected]

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Clare Bowditch is an author, singer and gifted story teller, a troubadour and advocate for those without power or voice. Her songs and work have meant so much to so many in our Australian community. She is an ARIA award winning musician for best female artist, won Rolling Stone’s Woman of the Year (for contribution to culture), a Logie-nominated actor for her role as Rosanna in Offspring and a former ABC broadcaster. Clare's memoir Your Own Kind of Girl is an honest, big hearted coming of age story punctuated by grief, anxiety and the battle with her inner critic, Frank. It's also full of vivid memories, tiny bits of joy that make life what it is, bloody beautiful. This is the work of a woman who has found her true power - and wants to pass it on. Happiness, she discovers, is only possible when we take charge of the stories we tell ourselves.

For more from Clare you can find her at www.clarebowditch.com where you can find links to her memoir Your Own Kind of Girl as well as a list of what she calls FUN STUFF like a recipe for her mum’s Dutch Apple Pie to songs you can play with 3 chords on guitar. 

For more from me you can head to www.clairetonti.com or @clairetonti on instagram

You can email me with suggestions for episode topics and guests to [email protected].

A big thank you to this wonderful team:

Editing - RAWCollings

Theme Music - Avocado Junkie

Graphic Design - Emma Hackett

Photography - Anna Robinson

Styling - Hilary Holmes

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week I talk to Tarang Chawla about the stories that men in particular are told through culture about who they should be. Award winning anti-violence campaigner and writer Tarang is also a trainee lawyer using his background to advocate for social and political change particularly in our approach to mental health and gender equality. Tarang also founded the Not One More Niki movement, Australia’s largest campaign to end violence against women in culturally diverse communities, named after his younger sister Nikita who was murdered in 2015 by her former partner. Tarang is warm and funny and has done what I think the only way through is when it comes to the hardest, most heart breaking moments in our lives. Like a rock under intense heat and pressure becomes a diamond he’s taken his and his family’s pain and turned it into something beautiful and important.

For more from Tarang Chawla you can visit his website www.tarangchawla.com

Subscribe here for – tontsnewsletter

You can find me on instagram @clairetonti or at www.clairetonti.com

You can email me with suggestions for episode topics and guests to [email protected]. Feel free to leave me a voice memo to be included in the show.

A big thank you to this wonderful team:

Editing - RAWCollings

Theme Music - Avocado Junkie

Graphic Design - Emma Hackett

Photography - Anna Robinson

Styling - Hilary Holmes

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Carley McGauran has been a psychologist for 15 years. In her work she has spent time with kids, young adults and their families assisting them with her sage advice about everything from how to process emotions, practice self-soothing and manage trauma to what the bloody hell we should all do about iPhones and screen time. She is the other half of the company Inform and Empower run with her brother Marty who I spoke to in a previous episode about Cyber Safety and TikTok. This episode is an extension of my chat with Marty but also includes just some of the best life and parenting advice I think I have ever heard. Carley puts things in a straight forward, warm and compassionate way and makes big parenting milestones feel manageable and achievable. At this time in 2021 when the world feels increasingly difficult and confronting, I found her advice so comforting and I hope you do too.

Inform and Empower: Cyber Safety Education helps schools and parents navigate the incredibly difficult task of protecting and educating our kids through the online space, social media and technology.

Vanessa Hamilton resource for sexuality education and supporting parents and schools www.talkingthetalksexed.com.au

Subscribe here for – tontsnewsletter

You can find me on instagram @clairetonti or at www.clairetonti.com

You can email me with suggestions for episode topics and guests to [email protected]. Feel free to leave me a voice memo to be included in the show.

A big thank you to this wonderful team:

Editing - RAWCollings

Theme Music - Avocado Junkie

Graphic Design - Emma Hackett

Photography - Anna Robinson

Styling - Hilary Holmes

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

My guest today is Holly Wainwright, much beloved podcaster of both Mamamia Outloud and the parenting show This Glorious Mess. She is head of content for the Mamamia women’s media company and Holly’s honest, funny and relatable voice is one of my favourites in the Australian podcast landscape. She is an author of three books The Mummy Bloggers, How to be Perfect and her most recent novel, I Give My Marriage A Year which husband man James and I both loved. We talk about her career as a journalist and editor, what it was like working in celebrity magazines in the 90s, being an expat during a global pandemic and what it is to be a mum in 2021. Holly makes so many of us feel seen and champions the idea that we all need to write ourselves an I don’t list. She unpacks what it means to have Superwoman Syndrome why it’s BS and an impossible task and I found her take on life with a career and kids and the juggle so refreshing and frankly very comforting. We also deep dive into her favourite movie When Harry met Sally and what a joy it is to look at all the problematic bits and Nora Ephron's ground breaking writing.

For more from Holly Wainwright you can visit her website www.hollywainwright.com or you can find her on her podcasts Mamamia Outloud and This Glorious Mess or buy her books from all good bookstores.

Subscribe here for – tontsnewsletter

You can find me on instagram @clairetonti or at www.clairetonti.com

You can email me with suggestions for episode topics and guests to [email protected]. Feel free to leave me a voice memo to be included in the show.

Show credits include:

Clip from When Harry Met Sally

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8kpYm-6nuE

A big thank you to this wonderful team:

Editing - RAWCollings

Theme Music - Avocado Junkie

Graphic Design - Emma Hackett

Photography - Anna Robinson

Styling - Hilary Holmes

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.