UNSUBSCRIBE with Ginny Priem

TW: This episode contains mention of addiction & suicide. If you are not in a place to listen to this content, please join in on another episode. If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.

In this 2-part episode, Ginny chats with Allie Enggren & Samantha Mello of "The Twisted Sisters" podcast. Allie & Samantha met while in beauty school together and bonded over being teen moms before becoming best friends. While they say opposites attract, Allie & Sam say that they also know too many of each other's secrets to ever break their bond. It's amazing that each of these ladies are thriving after everything they've been through. In part 1, we heard more about Samantha & Allie's friendship and a little more about some of what Allie's been through and how her life has been shaped. In part 2, we hear Samantha's raw journey of trauma & adversity and how she's come out stronger on the other side.

Listen to The Twisted Sister's podcast episode where Ginny was their guest: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/youre-my-favorite-a-true-minnesota-story-with-ginny-priem/id1611111333?i=1000610505987

The Twisted Sisters info:

Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-twisted-sisters-podcast/id1611111333

Website: https://thetwistedsisterspodcast.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/the_twistedsisterspodcast/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_twistedsisterspodcast/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetwistedsisterspodcast?lang=en

Allie's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allieenggren_realtor/

Samantha's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SamanthaR.Mello

Ginny's Info:

Website: www.ginnypriem.com

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Ginnypriem

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGyzQcBdoL1GoLaBCkE9Bag

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ginnypriem

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ginny-priem-8a87248/

Ginny sits down with board-certified dermatologist & friend, Dr. Mohiba Tareen. In the fall of 2018, Ginny needed Dr. Tareen's help. She had a huge lump growing rapidly above her right eye and her face and eye were swelling terribly. She was concerned. Dr. Tareen was also concerned and was able to see her rather quickly. Upon entering the room, Dr. Tareen diagnosed Ginny with singles...on her face. This seemed unusual since she was only in her 30's, but Dr. Tareen asked right away, "Have you been under a lot of stress?" That's what sparked this episode and the important dialogue around the topic of how stress manifests in our hair, skin & nails. Who better to have this conversation with than an expert?! Ginny wondered if our bodies sometimes know we're under stress before our minds can catch up. Dr. Tareen unpacks how stress can impact the skin with things like shingles, acne, eczema, psoriasis, precancerous lesions...or even melanoma. Ginny also experienced significant hair loss & breakage during this time, as identified by her hair stylist. Dr. Tareen let us know that this is very common, especially in women. She breaks down the 3 different phases of hair growth and how they play a part: telogen, anagen & catagen. Dr. Tareen didn't just talk about the issues, but also provided solutions to all of these issues. In nails, you may also experience breakage and Dr. Tareen shared that picking cuticles & skin is also common when people are under stress. And of course, it wouldn't be a complete conversation with a board-certified dermatologist if we didn't talk prevention (your skin is your largest organ!) and sun protection. Dr. Tareen unpacked the best sunscreens and that you need to protect your skin from both UVA (aging) and UVA (burning) rays and the best way to do this is with a physical block, like a zinc. Get your skin checks, take vitamin D, wear sun protection, & invest in a hat.

Dr. Mohiba Tareen Bio:

Dr. Mohiba Tareen is a highly-regarded board-certified dermatologist. She is the Founder and Medical Director of Tareen Dermatology. Since its establishment in 2011, Tareen Dermatology has grown to five locations - Roseville, Faribault, Maplewood, Monticello, MN, with its newest location in Hudson, WI.
Dr. Tareen is a magna cum laude graduate of the University of Michigan, where she was a member of the Phi Beta Kappa honor society. She earned her medical degree at the University of Michigan and was inducted into the Alpha Omega Alpha Honor Medical Society. She was awarded two prestigious scholarships in medical school: The Glasgow-Rubin Award to the top 5 female graduates and the MAPI award for the number one academic student of Indian descent.
Dr. Tareen completed her dermatology residency at Columbia Presbyterian Medical Center in New York, New York. During this time, she also lectured extensively and had her work published in several prestigious medical journals, including The New England Journal of Medicine. In addition, she was awarded the Conrad Stritzler Award of the New York Dermatological Society while a second-year resident.
Dr. Tareen completed a prestigious Procedural Dermatology Fellowship where she specialized in advanced laser, surgery, and cosmetic dermatology. She subsequently practiced medical and cosmetic dermatology in Manhattan. She comes from a family of doctors and is married to a urologist, with whom she has five beautiful children.

Tareen Dermatology Information:

Website: www.tareendermatology.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TareenDermatology

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tareendermatology/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@tareenderm

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TareenDermatology/featured

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/tareen-dermatology/

Ginny's Socials:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Ginnypriem

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ginny-priem-8a87248/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGyzQcBdoL1GoLaBCkE9Bag

This episode is all about real confidence. How do you define confidence? Ginny explores some ideas of what it is and what it isn't. Is this something that impacts women more than men? In this world of social media, it seems as though some may have started valuing themselves based on things like how many followers they have on Instagram or TikTok or how many likes they get on their stories, posts, reels, or YouTube shorts. Confidence isn't about seeking external validation. Someone who exudes confidence is Dolly Parton and she's quoted saying in an @Oprahdaily article that when you are comfortable with yourself, the right people are drawn to you. Here at Drinking With Gin, we're going to put our own little twist on it and at that when you have confidence and are comfortable with yourself, the right people are drawn to you. Confidence is being able to walk into a room and not compare yourself to anyone else. It's not judging others, which can be oh so hard to do. It's accepting accountability, responsibility and taking ownership. Confidence is being able to admit your weaknesses and shout someone else's name that might be a better fit for something than you are, especially when they're not even in the room. Being famous on social media is a little bit like being rich at Monopoly or landing that big job in the game of Life. Real confidence is about how much you genuinely like yourself. That's the real rich.

Send in your questions or thoughts on confidence!

Resources:

Life Hack article: https://www.lifehack.org/339425/real-confidence-isnt-like-what-most-people-think-of

Oprah Daily: https://www.oprahdaily.com/life/relationships-love/g26194014/strong-confident-women-quotes/?slide=17

Ginny's Website: www.ginnypriem.com

Ginny's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

Audio Engineer: @bustabrent

Unpacking some potential red flags in romantic relationships or romantic interests. Ginny speaks much from her own experience in real life with "Chad." A common theme is that we need to trust ourselves and what feels right, or doesn't feel right, for us. If something seems nonsensical, it probably doesn't make sense. And no one is going to know what's right (or wrong) for you, better than you! Some of the things outlined here: Are they shady with their phone or constantly on it but doing "nothing" on it or talking to "no one?" Do they have weird notification settings on their phone, get a new phone number often, or use several different apps to communicate with different people? Pay attention to how they treat you in public vs private. Are your timelines aligned as to how quickly or slowly things are moving in the relationship? Is it too fast or too slow? Do they have long-standing friendships or other close relationships in their life? If not, this could be an indicator as to their ability to maintain relationships in general. Or if they've always been wronged and have a revolving door of friends in their life, this could be a big red flag. Lying, especially pathological lying can be detrimental to a romantic relationship or any type of relationship. Gaslighting, manipulation, jealousy, or constant criticism could be red flags as well. Inconsistency: How do they treat you in public vs private? Do they even take you in public? Do certain things just not add up, like their finances? Love bombing: are they over the top with showering & showering you with gifts, notes, cards, flowers, fancy dinners, concerts, sporting events & putting you on a pedestal? Open communication should be key. If they dodge difficult conversations and are secretive or don't support the exciting things you have going on or support the relationship, these could be red flags. And if they are having to sell you on how great they are...Ginny says to run the other way! No one should have to sell you on how good of a friend, person, boyfriend, girlfriend, etc they are. People will show you who they are. See that.

Show reference: Tell Me Lies (Hulu)

Women's Health Article: https://www.womenshealthmag.com/relationships/a24800980/relationship-red-flags/

The Twisted Sisters Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5nEgskHRMD4RzcyxxFfsJo?si=ptNvWOepTAqcluqVMKmdpg

Connect with Ginny:

W: www.ginnypriem.com

I: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

F: https://www.facebook.com/Ginnypriem

L: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ginny-priem-8a87248/

Y: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGyzQcBdoL1GoLaBCkE9Bag

Jim Rendon is here to talk about his book, Upside: The New Science of Post-Traumatic Growth, where he interviews men & women from all over the world about their experiences with trauma and post traumatic growth. Growing up with a trauma survivor, his dad, who lived through The Holocaust, Jim was intrigued to uncover more about what happens when people experience post traumatic stress disorder, post traumatic symptoms and post traumatic growth. He worked with psychologists and experts to better understand the science and clinical perspective in depth.

This conversation sheds light on the idea that growth or growing is not linear & trauma is subjective. One story highlighted might really surprise you and the importance of keeping in mind that everyone's experience of what might be a seismic event may vary. And ultimately, the idea and ability for people to grow after trauma is more available and common than we might think. Jim puts it well when he says that the people who experience this type of growing and growth where they find new meaning and purpose in life have a mindset of thinking about the possibilities.

Jim Rendon is a Washington DC-based writer who covers nonprofits, science, design, the environment and plenty of other topics. He's gone cage diving with great white sharks, toured remote, ridge-top marijuana grows, visited maximum security prisons and mental institutions in pursuit of a story. His work has appeared in The New York Times Magazine and newspaper, Time, the Wall Street Journal, Mother Jones, Marie Claire, Fortune, Men's Journal, Outside, SmartMoney and other publications. His second book, Upside: The New Science of Post-Traumatic Growth was published in 2015.

See more about Jim & his work here: https://www.jimrendon.com/

Buy Upside: The New Science of Post-Traumatic Growth here: https://a.co/d/gNpAVhT

Ginny's website: www.ginnypriem.com

Ginny's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

You requested, so here it is! After an Instagram poll, many of you voted and wanted to hear about friendship red flags and romantic relationship red flags. But friendship red flags squeaked by with the win to go first. So, this episode covers several red flags or potential red flags where a friendship may be toxic or just may no longer be healthy for you. One of the key indicators is to pay attention to how you feel after interactions or conversation with this person. It goes back to your emotional bank account and noticing if people are energy takers or energy givers. Do you feel fulfilled or exhausted? Do you cringe or feel dread or just that you don't have the emotional capacity to answer when you see their name pop up on your phone? These could be red flags or signs that this person isn't healthy for you. Do they ignore your boundaries, even after you've expressed them? Really pay attention to these things if they become patterns of destructive behavior. Does this person constantly gossip and trash talk negatively other friends in their life? If so, they're doing it to you, too! You are not immune to this. If they are sharing other people's personal and confidential information with you, they're sharing yours with others. If your friend only shows up for you when you're struggling or your life is in shambles, this could be a problem. Your friends will want to support your endeavors and ambitions and your successes and celebrate with you along the way. Are they jealous or do they criticize you all the time? Do they use sarcasm as a mean way to cut you down, but then say just kidding? Again, looking for patterns of these behaviors could be useful. Are you all of a sudden their best friend in the whole world even though you hardly know one another? Best friend status should take some time to establish to really get to know and trust one another. Narcissistic behaviors, like love bombing, can happen in friendships, too. It's not exclusive to romantic relationships. And maybe one of the biggest red flags is if they don't really have any other friendships, especially long standing friendships. The definition of this may vary based on age, but if they constantly have a new best friend, but then they cut them out of their life because they've always been wronged...this could be a big red flag! At some point, what is the common denominator? People should be able to maintain healthy relationships and friendships for extended periods of time if they have healthy boundaries. If you've experienced any of these or other red flags or toxic friendship behaviors not discussed here, please share them!

Ginny's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

Ginny's Website: www.ginnypriem.com

In this episode, Ginny shares 3 of the biggest lessons she's learned and solidified in the last year. This timeframe specifically because after publishing her book, "You're My Favorite," these 3 areas really seemed to be highlighted. The first one is that vulnerability is strength. Ginny used to be tough, but found strength in vulnerability. The 2nd one is discovering that there is a path forward. In discovering this, she then went on to develop a coaching program around the model she used to catapult herself forward from a difficult time. Last, but not least, the importance of community is highlighted. Community starts with learning about, understanding and loving yourself so that you can understand the importance of the community around you. In some cases, you may decide that you need to make some modifications for yourself in your community. Ginny Grey Rocked a friend out of her life and did disconnect with a few family members. This allowed for even stronger connections and relationships to be built. Sometimes growing requires new people, new locations and new experiences. Embrace the new.

Come hang out on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

If you love Drinking with Gin, you may also enjoy Storytelling with Lindsay Bednar. It's about empowering, inspiring and educational conversations that Lindsay has with guests so that people are able to better understand and connect with one another. Take a listen here: https://open.spotify.com/show/5piCjmFUkFEy9LPhjZmnx8?si=e4af8b73c1834cd9

Oops...there are a couple of swear words in this episode! Nothing crazy or vulgar...in fact the couple swear words are kind of cute, but wanted to give you a heads up.

TW: sexual assault and rape are briefly mentioned in this episode. Nothing specific or detailed is discussed, but if you are not in a place at this time to hear those terms, you may want to come back another time.

This conversation is everything! Post traumatic growth and growing through adversity are the cornerstones of what Ginny's speaking, writing, podcast and coaching is all about. Lisa's experience and expertise is coupled with her compassionate and wonderful demeanor for a supportive and meaningful conversation on how people that have faced trauma and adversity can find the light at the end of the tunnel. The passion and connection in the conversation comes through. Normalization and validation are common themes throughout as well as noting that the pain & suffering can co-exist with the growing. This episode is powerful!

Lisa is a recognized expert in the strengths-based, de-pathologized treatment of trauma and has been in private practice for over 39 years. She presents workshops and keynote addresses nationally and internationally, and is a clinical consultant to practitioners and mental health agencies in the United States, Canada, the UK and Ireland. She has been an Adjunct Faculty member at several Universities, and is the Founder of “The Ferentz Institute,” now in its sixteenth year of providing continuing education to mental health professionals and graduating several thousand clinicians from her two Certificate Programs in Advanced Trauma Treatment. In 2009 she was voted the “Social Worker of Year” by the Maryland Society for Clinical Social Work. Lisa is the author of “Treating Self-Destructive Behaviors in Traumatized Clients: A Clinician’s Guide,” now in its second edition, “Letting Go of Self-Destructive Behaviors: A Workbook of Hope and Healing,” and “Finding Your Ruby Slippers: Transformative Life Lessons From the Therapist’s Couch.” Lisa also hosted a weekly radio talk show, writes blogs and articles for websites on trauma, attachment, self-destructive behaviors, and self-care, teaches on many webinars, and is a contributor to Psychologytoday.com. You can follow Lisa’s work on her website, www.theferentzinstitute.com, YouTube, LinkedIn and Twitter.

Lisa's book on Amazon: https://a.co/d/2PIR9IH

Ginny's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/

Ginny's website: www.ginnypriem.com

Dr. Timothy Levine gives us the truth about lying. He has studied extensively human behavior around lying and telling the truth. Ginny discovered his work on The Truth Default Theory in Malcolm Gladwell's book Talking to Strangers and knew he'd be a perfect expert guest for the podcast. Dr. Levine breaks down for us some of the information in his studies and it may surprise you! He talks to us about lying and honesty as well as pathological liars and we of course have to touch on narcissists. He also discusses his latest book, Duped. If you're a true crime junkie, you'll definitely want to grab a copy. You do not want to miss this episode!

Dr. Timothy Levine is Distinguished Professor and Chair of Communication Studies at University of Alabama at Birmingham .  Levine teaches and conducts research on topics related to deception, interpersonal communication, persuasion and social influence, cross-cultural communication, and social scientific research methods.  In addition to teaching graduate and undergraduate classes, Levine does training for police, attorneys, and people in the intelligence and counterintelligence communities.  Before UAB, he held faculty appointments at Korea University, Michigan State University, Indiana University and University of Hawaii.  Levine has published more than 140 refereed journal articles reporting original research related to communication and he is an internationally recognized leader in deception research.  He is the author or co-author of Information Manipulation Theory, Truth-Default Theory, the Veracity Effect, the Probing Effect, and the Park-Levine Probability Model.  His research on deception has been funded by the National Science Foundation, U.S. Department of Defense, and the FBI.  His current research focuses on what makes some people more believable than others and on effective interrogation strategies. Levine’s new book, Duped, describes his program of research on deception relevant to Truth-Default Theory. He has done training and workshops for the FBI BAU, NSA, various military groups, and various prosecutors. His work has recently been covered in NYT, CNN, and Newsweek.

You can learn more about Dr. Levine's work on his website: http://timothy-levine.squarespace.com/

Purchase Dr. Levine's book, Duped: https://a.co/d/ddL1xm7

Ginny's website: www.ginnypriem.com

Ginny's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ginnypriem/