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We told you we wanted to talk about sex on this podcast, and this is where we wanted to start -- with a talk about not having sex. 

We had a conversation with with Fr. Patrick Briscoe, a Catholic Dominican Friar, and Sara Perla, a single Catholic woman, about the purpose of celibacy for Catholics and how they support a large group of adults committed to it. Catholics take as doctrine Jesus’ statement that “at the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage” and thus that singleness allows one to live as Jesus lived, and as all of us will live in heaven. Following the Apostle Paul, they consider marriage a holy vocation but acknowledge that it requires one to care for “things that are of the world.” Singleness, meanwhile, allows one to care with an undivided heart for “things that are of the Lord.” 

Celibacy isn't considered easy for Catholics, but it is deeply meaningful: it's an opportunity to channel one's individual  passions into a universal, Christlike love, and to share that with the world.

Single Latter-day Saints do not take vows of celibacy so much as vows (or covenants) that imply celibacy, given marital status. The Church’s teachings simply demand “sexual relations to be reserved for marriage between a man and a woman.” Almost nothing is said about erotic and sexual desires prior to marriage. We don't see a distinct theological purpose to nor do we seem to think seriously about how to provide practical, communal support people who live this way.

What would it look like to see singleness, and celibacy, not as a sad circumstance of not ever having married, but as a dignified life path? What if we saw, in restraint around sexual and romantic relationships, an opportunity to deepen our sensitivity to the unending loneliness of humanity? Has our pro-sex, family-centric theology caused us to overlook the ways we might care for each other through non-family structures? 

We can't wait to hear what you think. Email us at [email protected] or join our conversation on instagram @the.soloists

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