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"I just needed to get that out."
"I feel better once I verbally process it."
If that's the story you tell yourself, this episode is going to poke holes in it. That habit is venting and it makes you feel worse, not better. At least not in any way that lasts. And it might be the exact thing keeping you stuck.
Here's the thing about "getting it out": when you sit down to vent, you're not releasing anything. You're building a case. You're the lawyer and the jury, gathering evidence that you were right all along that you're not lovable, that money's hard, that bad things always happen to you.
That's confirmation bias, and your brain is wired to go prove whatever you already believe. So every time you tell the story, you pave that pathway a little smoother. That's how a thought becomes a belief. That's how a belief becomes your reality.
In this episode I'll break down why venting feels so good in the moment (spoiler: it's the same relief as caving on the drink or the cookie you swore off), why "I can't help it" is a practiced habit and not a fact, and the one thing to do instead...release the feeling, not the story. If your mind has felt like a hard place to live lately, this one's for you.
No more indulging. Just feel it, and go.
What You'll Take AwayGet direct access to me for personalized guidance, honest feedback, nervous system calibration, and support tailored to your specific goals, challenges, and circumstances. Find out more here
đ©” Get daily supportThe Daily Recalibration gives you short daily reminders to help your nervous system stop defaulting to people pleasing, overfunctioning, and self abandonment. Get the Daily Recalibration
đ©” Get community supportThe calm AF community is the place to practice what you're learning alongside people who are doing the same work. Join the list for the next cohort of the Calm AF Community.
By Kristen Finch4.8
150150 ratings
"I just needed to get that out."
"I feel better once I verbally process it."
If that's the story you tell yourself, this episode is going to poke holes in it. That habit is venting and it makes you feel worse, not better. At least not in any way that lasts. And it might be the exact thing keeping you stuck.
Here's the thing about "getting it out": when you sit down to vent, you're not releasing anything. You're building a case. You're the lawyer and the jury, gathering evidence that you were right all along that you're not lovable, that money's hard, that bad things always happen to you.
That's confirmation bias, and your brain is wired to go prove whatever you already believe. So every time you tell the story, you pave that pathway a little smoother. That's how a thought becomes a belief. That's how a belief becomes your reality.
In this episode I'll break down why venting feels so good in the moment (spoiler: it's the same relief as caving on the drink or the cookie you swore off), why "I can't help it" is a practiced habit and not a fact, and the one thing to do instead...release the feeling, not the story. If your mind has felt like a hard place to live lately, this one's for you.
No more indulging. Just feel it, and go.
What You'll Take AwayGet direct access to me for personalized guidance, honest feedback, nervous system calibration, and support tailored to your specific goals, challenges, and circumstances. Find out more here
đ©” Get daily supportThe Daily Recalibration gives you short daily reminders to help your nervous system stop defaulting to people pleasing, overfunctioning, and self abandonment. Get the Daily Recalibration
đ©” Get community supportThe calm AF community is the place to practice what you're learning alongside people who are doing the same work. Join the list for the next cohort of the Calm AF Community.

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